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The Government Is Out Of The Equality Business
After the financial crisis and the Occupy era, “inequality” became a mainstream political issue. And the Obama administration made some quantifiable progress. Now? Prepare for the reverse. ...
Daddy Trump Let Lil' Donnie Pick The Interior Secretary Most Likely To Let Him Kill Things<em></em>
Donald Trump Jr., an avid hunter and even more avid hunting message board user, will officially be taking over the family business come inauguration day. This means that there’s absolutely no world in which Don Jr. should be meddling in his father’s pending presidency whatsoever. Except, apparently,...
Is This What We Want?
Ultimately, we are the ones who decide what we will demand from the people we put into power. Which is why we will always get what we deserve. ...
Lakers Decide Not To Stay At Trump-Branded Hotel Over "Security Concerns"
According to a report from the Los Angeles Times, the Los Angeles Lakers will not be staying at the Trump SoHo hotel this week. They were initially scheduled to stay there in advance of their game in Brooklyn against the Nets on Wednesday, but they decided not to because of “security concerns.” Supp...
Triple H: Donald Trump Is Unclear On Whether Wrestling Is Real<em></em>
Back in 2007, WWE ran a storyline that culminated with CEO Vince McMahon being blown up in a limo. You don’t need me to tell you that McMahon is still alive and was not actually blown to pieces, because you aren’t a moron who thinks wrestling is real. Apparently, the same cannot be said for our futu...
Rick Perry's Glasses Qualify Him For Important Science Post, Building Nukes<em></em><em></em>
Rick Perry, a swaggering idiot who found a pair of glasses on the street one day, is about to become the head of the Department of Energy, according to CBS News. The Department of Energy’s job right now is to develop the next generation of nuclear weapons. What this means practically speaking, of co...
This <i>Seinfeld</i> Reboot Sucks
Donald Trump, who will be spending the next four years traveling around the country doing stand-up, took some time today to give his hungry constituents what they crave: good, clean observational humor. ...
Donald Trump Names WWE's Linda McMahon To Head Small Business Administration
Because life is one cruel joke after another, Linda McMahon, former president and CEO of the WWE, has been named to head up President-elect Donald Trump’s Small Business Administration....
Real Piece Of Shit Column: Corruption Is Fine
As much as Republicans groaned about Donald Trump, they were always destined to fall in line once he actually had power. They are still falling. ...
Liberals Cheering On The Electoral College Dope Who Won't Vote For Donald Trump Is Really Frightening
Last night, the New York Times published an editorial written by Christopher Surpun, a “Republican presidential elector” from Texas who says that he will not cast his electoral college vote for Donald Trump, despite Trump winning the state by nine points. Surpun doesn’t say who he will vote for, but...
LeBron James And A Few Teammates Opt Out Of Team's Scheduled Stay At Trump-Branded Hotel
The Cleveland Cavaliers are visiting New York this week to play the Knicks on Wednesday, but LeBron James and a few other Cavaliers players will not be staying at a Trump-branded hotel in Manhattan, per reports from ESPN and the Cleveland Plain Dealer. The Cavs were not among the three teams who de...
Despair Is The Best Way To Beat Jet Lag, But These Might Work Too
After a few years of not leaving these fine United States, this month I flew around the world and back twice, due to poor planning on my part and unmovable family obligations. (You can’t just reschedule your cousin’s wedding, it turns out.) Having zoomed across 12 time zones four separate times, I c...
Get A Load Of This Ascot-Wearing, Wine-Toting Anti-Trump Philadelphia Vandal
Last week, two men spray painted “FUCK TRUMP!” on the wall of a Philadelphia Fresh Market. (That’s like a cut-rate Whole Foods.) They were a bit haphazard with their vandalism and got caught on security cameras by the grocery store. This is not a particularly notable case on its merits, and would be...
These Are Real Notes From A Real Conversation Between Donald Trump And The Prime Minister Of Pakistan
These are the real notes from a real conversation between President-elect Donald Trump and Nawaz Sharif, the Prime Minister of Pakistan. This is a screenshot from the website of the Press Information Department of the government of Pakistan. It has not been altered in any way....
How's That Swamp-Draining Going?
This week, in #DrainTheSwamp news: ...
A Psychologist Says She Is Quitting The VA Because Of Donald Trump
Last week, we published the thoughts of a wide variety of U.S. government employees about the prospect of working for a Donald Trump administration. Today, we hear from a VA psychologist who says she is planning to resign rather than work under Trump....
You Wanted A "Go Fuck Yourself" Shirt, You Got A "Go Fuck Yourself" Shirt
Deadspin readers, to go by my inbox, agree on very few things, but agree on them strongly. Dogs, the readers say, are good; each successive editor-in-chief has done more to ruin the site than the last; the St. Louis Cardinals can go to hell; and we should sell a “Go fuck yourself” shirt....
How To Talk To Your Shithead Liberal Nephew Over The Holidays<em></em>
Congratulations! You won the election. Not you, specifically—unless you’re reading this, Mr. Trump, which, now that your name is in it, you probably are—but your people: Real American Men, where “real” means over 45 and white, “American” means suburban- or rural-residing, and “men” means what it use...
Kevin Johnson Apparently Out Of The Running To Be Married To Trump's Secretary of Education
Disgraced school-privatization activist Michelle Rhee announced today that she doesn’t want—or at least is not pursuing—a job as Donald Trump’s secretary of education....
Some U.S. Soldiers Share Extremely Blunt Thoughts On Commander-In-Chief Donald Trump
Government employees have shared serious concerns about working under Donald Trump. None of them are more concerned than the active duty members of the U.S. military who wrote to us. ...