um Page 259 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Now This Is How You Terrify Babies
More than a hundred infants were on hand at Tokyo’s Irugi Shrine yesterday, taking part in an ancient ritual designed to ensure babies’ health. The secret? Use sumo wrestlers to get them bawling their eyes out....
Darren Rovell Can't Tell A Two From A Five
Darren Rovell is a petty dickhead. Because people make so many jokes about how he is a money-grubbing, soulless, post-human shill for rich old men and corporations, his sheer petty dickheadedness can go underappreciated, but it's really what defines him, which is why the very best Rovell stories i...
You Need More Bruce Lee In Your Life; Start With <em>The Chinese Connection</em>
The most iconic moment in 1972's Bruce Lee vehicle The Chinese Connection, and maybe of his entire career, comes when he walks into a Japanese dojo with a sign that the Japanese, as an insult, left at his teacher's funeral. He says he'll take on anyone in the dojo, and when one guy steps up, Lee s...
Tom Brady Shares His Old Resumé
Now he's one of the most recognizable men in the world. But back in 2000, Tom Brady was a kid fresh out of state school with no concrete plans, but a wealth of crappy summer-job experience. We've all been there, Tom....
Blue Jackets Not Fucking Around With Ryan Johansen Contract Negotiations
After a breakout 33-goal season, Blue Jackets center Ryan Johansen is seeking a bigger payday. But he and Columbus are far apart on just how big, and Johansen isn't planning to report to camp when it opens tomorrow. So the Blue Jackets just pulled something I don't know that I've ever seen a team do...
Sandy Koufax: Jackie Robinson Tried To Make Things Easier For Me
The beauty of the Internet is that it offers up surprises and treats. Never know when you're going to find something worth remembering. I was toolin' around my Tumblr feed the other day when I ran across a beautiful illustrated piece by an artist named Katherine W. Wirick. Another talented picture-m...
Angry Ukrainian Mob Throws Politician Into A Dumpster
An angry mob was waiting outside of Ukraine's parliament today, and they were not playing games. When they spotted Economic Development Party member Vitaly Zhuravsky leaving the building, they grabbed him and threw his ass right into a dumpster....
Couple Making Out At LSU Game Take Tumble Down The Bleachers
These two didn't care about LSU football. Hell, they were so into each other that they didn't even care about gravity. But gravity won....
Report: Roger Goodell Cancels Appearance At 49ers Game
Roger Goodell has reportedly had a last-minute change-of-heart about attending tonight's 49ers home opener, despite having had his appearance scheduled for a couple years....
This Hug Of The UMass Kicker Is Just Mean
UMass — the University of Massachusetts football team — blew a 31-20 lead on the road at Vanderbilt, and then missed this 22-yard field goal that could've sent it to overtime....
This Dumb Cup Has Room For Chips And Soda, But Not For Dignity
Perhaps you have seen a TV commercial for a product called "Snackeez," a grotesquely large plastic beverage cup with a special dry chamber for storing your favorite garbage snacks. If you have not, here it is:...
How Long Does It Take To Become A Yokozuna Sumo Wrestler?
Yokozuna is the highest rank in sumo, but over the past 250 years, the sumo wrestlers who've reached the title have gotten younger, and in the last few years, less Japanese. ...
Stop Whining About Pumpkin Beer
We the people like to complain about every damn thing in the world, and for some strange reason, we've settled on pumpkin beer as one of the things to complain about the most. The stuff sells outrageously well, and in so doing serves as a gateway beer guiding people out of the macro cooler, even if ...
Jadeveon Clowney Blames Texans' Crappy Turf For Knee Injury
LB Jadeveon Clowney, the first-overall draft pick, will miss time as he recovers from a torn meniscus in his right knee suffered in the second quarter of yesterday's season opener. He told one teammate how it went down:...
Hey, Another Guy Got Kicked In The Head Yesterday
It's getting real out here, man. Yesterday, we saw NFL player Antonio Brown jump kick a punter, and it was fucking gorgeous. Let's keep this going....
Maurice Jones-Drew Bicycle-Kicks His Fumble Into Derek Carr's Hands
Maurice Jones-Drew was fortunate enough to kick his own fumble back to quarterback Derek Carr. He definitely knew what he was doing. No fumble luck here. Seriously though, impressive awareness by Carr to watch the play and reel in the ball....
Don't Step To Will Muschamp About His One-Play Suspensions
Florida's season opener on Saturday was suspended after just one play, a kickoff, after rain and lightning strikes made the game unplayable. Two days later, coach Will Muschamp announced that three suspended Gators would be reinstated. This struck some observers as funny. It was not funny to Muscham...
Raiders Closing In On Stadium Deal To Keep Team In Oakland
It looks like Oakland Raiders owner Mark Davis got exactly what he wanted out of all of those fancy steak dinners in San Antonio and all that public kissy-face with Los Angeles. According to the San Francisco Chronicle, the city of Oakland has cobbled together a deal for a new stadium that would k...