um Page 328 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
100 Percent Of The NBA's Asian-American Population Now Plays For The Knicks
The Knicks added Jeremy Lin to the roster last night in an effort to fix the fact that they have zero depth in the backcourt. He's the league's lone Asian-American player, and he's also the only Harvard grad in the pros. Get this kid a billboard....
Yorvit Torrealba Receives 66-Game Suspension For Slugging A Venezuelan League Umpire
The Rangers catcher's physically expressed frustration at a prior strike call earned him 66 games in Venezuelan winter ball, which is the rest of this season and all of next. We wonder how broken up he is about it, considering his son was kidnapped in his home country a few years back, and the wor...
Yorvit Torrealba Spread The Holiday Spirit By Slugging A Venezuelan League Umpire
Rangers catcher Yorvit Torrealba is spending the offseason playing for his hometown Leones del Caracas of the Venezuelan League, and after missing badly for strike three took his frustrations out on the umpire in an ugly way. It was, if my Spanish is correct, one of two attacks on the home plate u...
Kobe Is (Allegedly) A Better Womanizer Than He Is A Basketball Player: A Statistical Analysis
The National Enquirer dropped one of its perhaps-truth bombs this week on Kobe Bryant's marriage (here's a summary, since the Enquirer wants you to splurge in the supermarket and didn't put its story online): The tab reports that Bryant had affairs with 105 women during the 10 years he was married t...
It's Going To Be A Long, Miserable Year For Kris Humphries
Kris Humphries's summer sideshow was entertaining but seemed ultimately irrelevant: his dalliances with Kim Kardashian and with reality TV were in the universe of entertainment and celebrity, not our sports universe. We'd get our jokes, E! gets their ratings, Humphries and the Kardashians make a q...
Chad McGhee Has Risen Up Against President Obama And Government Itself
Now that the Knox City Greyhounds season is over, Chad McGhee has turned his attention to matters besides Texas high school six-man football. Here, he takes both a moral and political stand against the POTUS and affiliated pagans who have declared war on the Lord. In these War on Christmas times, ...
If You're Ready, We Now Have A Photo Of That Pooped-In Hockey Glove
To be clear, what you are looking at is not Dave Bermingham's glove right after fellow adult league hockey player Zung Nguyen defecated in it following a fight. What you are looking at is Dave Bermingham's glove a week later, still pregnant with feces....
Aw Jeez, The Lights Are Out At Candlestick Again, A Fan Is On The Field, And Big Ben Is Providing Commentary
The lights went back out in Candlestick with 12:13 left in the first half, leading a fan to conclude the time was ripe to run onto the field. Ben Roethlisberger, meanwhile, lamented James Harrison's suspension—while Harrison himself took credit for the outage....
When The Lights Go Down In The City
The start of Monday Night Football is currently delayed due to this transformer explosion that blacked out Candlestick Park and presumably led to several copped feels. [ESPN]...
Breaking Down The Football In <i>The Dark Knight Rises</i>
It's nerd Christmas, as the trailer for The Dark Knight Rises was released today to the orgiastic squeals of the internet. There's plenty to take in: Bane's unintelligible speech, Anne Hathaway's vie to become the first woman since Michelle Pfeiffer to actually add something to a superhero movie—b...
Ron Rivera Says The Panthers' Trick Play Yesterday Was Inspired By The Movie <i>Little Giants</i>
Carolina head coach Ron Rivera told reporters this afternoon that the Panthers' trick play against Houston yesterday was inspired by "The Annexation of Puerto Rico," the Fumblerooski play used at the end of the 1994 classic film Little Giants. Here's the play in question, which in the movie is cal...
Elvis Dumervil Made Tom Brady Fear For His Life
Sure, the Patriots throttled the Broncos 41-23. But New England's victory didn't come at the expense of a little of Tom Brady's machismo, as the horrified look in his eyes upon this sack by Elvis Dumervil was more apropos for someone who wears Uggs. Which, I guess, means it's apropos—period. ...
Pre-Kardashian Kris Humphries Went On A Date With One Of Jon Huntsman's Daughters
Things are looking up for Kris Humphries, the NBA free agent who spent 72 days married to Kim Kardashian. Last we checked in with him, he had to deal with a "KRIS IS GAY!" tabloid cover, and he had survived what was—unofficially—the worst year ever....
How A Senior League Hockey Fight Ended With One Player Pooping In An Opponent's Glove
Earlier today, the most intriguing athlete bio in the history of athlete bios made the rounds. Zung Nguyen, a 37-year old defenseman for a Boston-area men's hockey league, became an instant legend for this single sentence:...
I-Team: Tell Us About This Adult Hockey League Poop Fight
Just 45 seconds into a New England Senior Hockey League game in Hingham, Mass., on Friday, December 2nd, Rogue Squadron defenseman Zung Nguyen was penalized for unsportsmanlike conduct and given a game misconduct. Nguyen's player profile page sheds more light:...
Dolphins Fan Gets Brutally Knocked Out In The Sun Life Stadium Parking Lot (Video) (Updated)
The sucker punch that dropped a Dolphins fan in the parking lot after Sunday's game vs. the Eagles is so brutal that the meathead who threw it should do some time. The sound of head hitting parking lot is chilling. The louder sound of the initial contact may be worse. Hearkens back to the near-dea...
Did Tim Tebow Break Up Lindsey Vonn's Marriage?
Last week we received an email that suggested something insane enough that we were happy to entertain it for a funny, fleeting moment, but mostly we were fairly certain that there was no way in hell it was in any way true....
Chris Paul Will Reportedly Not Go To The Lakers In A Three-Team Trade
NBA owners have reportedly pressured the league to kill the three-way deal. [RealGM.com]...
Chris Paul Will Reportedly Go To The Lakers In A Three-Team Trade
The NBA lockout officially ended this evening, when the players and owners ratified the new CBA in Manhattan, and everything else has already fallen back into place: The Clippers signed Caron Butler to a $24 million deal, the Knicks lost out on an opportunity to sign a great point guard, and the Lak...
Kris Humphries's Worst Year Ever Culminates In "KRIS IS GAY!" Tabloid Cover
As the year-end lists filter in this month, remember this: Not many people have had a more humiliating year than NBA free agent Kris Humphries. A year ago, Humphries was known as a mediocre pro basketball player who came off a mediocre bench for the mediocre New Jersey Nets. Now, after a 72-day marr...