w Page 4916 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch now that the Jackson trial is over ... Devil Rays at Yankees. Early arrivals get to see Sean Henn and his 19.20 ERA. It's Wimbledon! You know ... tennis. College World Series: Tulane vs. Texas. Come see the minor leagues' minor leagues....
We Bring Tiger Here To Bury, Not To Praise, Him
Yet another reason why being a multi-millionaire athlete that people worship all the world over must be a pain in the ass: People are always looking for you to screw up so they can metaphorically punch you in the face. Two golf strokes, over a 72-hole tournament, ultimately isn't much, but in the ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while proposing to Katie Holmes ... Spurs on brink of NBA title. Stern itching to get lockout started. Cleveland Rocks! Not really — Cleveland pretty much sucks. But the Indians have won nine straight. Tiger doesn't win U.S. Open. But he's still a 5-2 favorite in the Preakness....
Bobby Abreu's Otherworldly Restraint
All right, now, we pay pretty close attention to this sports business. (We do it for a living, after all.) But we'll fess up: We had heard nothing about this Bobby Abreu story from last month. Maybe it's because we don't watch Spanish language TV. But still....
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch to take your mind off of the giant meteor hurtling toward Earth ... Russell Crowe takes on Jethro Bodine's dad: Cinderella Man opens. Giants at Mets: See if they can get this one in before the sprinklers come on. Axis of Evil Cup: It's Iran vs. North Korea in World Cup qualifying match...
Now Fighting In The Flockhart Division
Anybody else find it amazing that this guy punches people for a living?...
McNabb, T.O. Continue Lovers' Spat
A confession: We love the havoc that Terrell Owens is wreaking in Philadelphia. That team was getting too boring and too content; the only thing better would be if he had signed with New England. Besides, while T.O. was playing on a broken leg in the Super Bowl, Donovan McNabb was, almost literall...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while standing vigil outside the courthouse at the Michael Jackson trial ... Spelling Bee champ wins on "appoggiatura." Form an orderly line, ladies — he's single. Heat Win, Wade Hurt: Shaq offers to pay for funerals of Mikan, Pistons. Cubs win 7th straight. Do we smell another Jimmy...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch after giving up on your annual attempt to read a book ... Final Day: Scripps National Spelling Bee. Can Evan O'Dorney prevail? (Last year a guy fainted from the pressure). Game 5: Pistons at Heat. We recommend viewing the Spelling Bee live, and TiVo-ing this. Yankees at Royals: New Yor...
Just Asking ...
We're watching the Spelling Bee, and find it amusing that the head judge in a contest for children is judged by a priest....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while coughing up that piece of wax fruit ... Arrivadercci Amare: Spurs reach NBA Finals. First Day, Scripps National Spelling Bee: Evan O'Dorney of Walnut Creek, Calif., advances by nailing "lederhosen." Lee's five hits power Cubs past Dodgers. In Juan Gonzalez terms, that's five se...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch now that "According to Jim" is in reruns ... Rangers go for 10th straight win. Face it, they're red hot — and your fantasy team has none of them. Game 5: Spurs at Suns: San Antonio set to wrap up Operation Desert Yawn. Braves at Nationals. Inspired by Deep Throat story, MLB to reveal a...
Buy The Nationals!
Wanted: Wealthy individual (white preferred. sorry!) willing to plunk down $400 million for franchise with limited television rights, decaying stadium and loyal (if a little too black) fan base. Must be open to making no decisions and following orders from former car salesmen and lawyers. Oh, and yo...
Nick Lachey's Typist <em>Really</em> Mad
Honestly, the city of Cincinnati just drives us crazy. On one hand, they arrest people for trying to show art. On the other, Jerry Springer was their mayor. Creationism museum? Put it in Cincy! Need a sportswriter? Grab Nick Lachey!...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while seceretly meeting with Bob Woodward in a parking garage ......
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch while loitering in the TV department at Circuit City ... Game 4: Miami Heat at Detroit Pistons: Larry Brown angrily denies report that his team is playing tonight. England, Beckham take on Colombia ... in New Jersey. Whose idea was this? Chicago Cubs at LA Dodgers. To save time we'll t...
Well, At Least He's Not Fighting Anymore
The show: Dancing With The Stars The premise: "Six celebrities and their professional partners embark on an intense competition — live — in front of a studio audience and the nation." The date: Tomorrow night, 9 p.m. ET The celebrity cast: Joey McIntyre (former New Kid; the gay one, we think) Tris...
Come See The Silly Sports!
We are but a month away from The World Games. What are The World Games, you ask? They're essentially a yearly audition for the Olympics by all the goofy sports that really would like to make it to the real games....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while hopelessly entangled in the volleyball net ... Suns unnecessarily extend tedium. Frank Thomas returns from DL, sparking White Sox to ... no wait, he's hurt again. Men attack each other with large sticks for two hours. No one is arrested.—Rick Chandler...