w Page 4975 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Guys And Dolls: Floyd, White Sox Back On Top
The inflatable sex doll community was shocked on Tuesday night when Chicago's Gavin Floyd once again lost a no-hitter in the late going; giving up a double to the Twins' Joe Mauer with one out in the ninth. (Inset: "Nooooo!"). Bobby Jenks came on to get the final two outs in the White Sox's 7-1 vic...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after giving acupuncture to Portland ... • NBA: Eastern Conference semifinals, Game 1, Cleveland at Boston (8:15 p.m., ET). Now it gets interesting. Papa John's Pizza, anyone? [TNT] • MLB: Indians at Yankees (7:10 p.m., ET). Drew Carey approves. [WKYC] [Yes Network] • Movie: Batman Beg...
Heidi Watney Makes It Through Her First Night Unscathed
Heidi Watney, much ballyhooed as the new NESN reporter of record for her, well, her Watney-ness, had her first on-air duties last night as the Red Sox talking lady of record. Red Sox bloggers all gave her passing grades for her first night's work....
GSTF Tour Returns ... In Milwaukee!
Well, in all the hullabaloo of the last week, we'd almost forgotten: We have a reading in Milwaukee this week! It had slipped past us, what with all the dumbing-down of America....
Ten Years Since Wood's Amazing Game
We love reminders of just how old we really are. Newsweek informed us that it has been 10 years since "Seinfeld" went off the hair air, which is just jaw-dropping, when you think about it. But that's nothing like Friends Of The Program's revelation: It has been 10 years since Kerry Wood's 20-strikeo...
Even A-Rod's Wife Questions Her Husband's Masculinity
It's tough for most of us to watch those "Miracle of Life" shows where they give you the full access to what it's really like to watch someone have a baby. After viewing it, you soon realize that even the most gruesome horror movies showing a screeching alien ejecting itself out of a person's stom...
White Sox Locker Room Is Not A Safe Environment For Women, Real Or Inflatable
Ozzie Guillen and the White Sox are now in the midst of being criticized (again) by some sports writers and the Association For Women In Sports Media for their creative blow-up doll, slump-busting shrine. The Association said said the shrine creates an "uncomfortable" environment for female sports w...
At Least SOMEONE Can Take Off The Favre Jersey Without Making A Whole Stink About It
Remember that kid who wore his Brett Favre jersey for four straight years? Well, either because Favre has retired or puberty is just around the corner, the kid has finally taken it off....
Yankees-Red Sox Rivalry Jumps Shark, Lands In Madness
Sometime in the not-so-distant future, when all the oil and electricity is gone, global warming takes a firm hold and mankind is left to fend for itself in a feral state, I would expect scenes such as the following to occur with frequency. But not yet. For the love of God, not yet. As you might have...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you put the finishing touches on your beer can coffin ... • Arena Football: Chicago at Tampa Bay (8 p.m., ET). Storm's a-brewin'. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at Detroit (7 p.m., ET). This matchup looked pretty bland two weeks ago. Now, I'm looking forward to it. [ESPN] • NBA: Eastern Conf...
Ozzie Guillen Does A Brilliant Ozzie Guillen Impersonation
Perhaps it's appropriate that Ozzie Guillen would unleash one of his patented expletive-filled tirades on Chicago fans, the Cubs, and media outlets just a few short days removed from the 25th anniversary of Lee Elia's epic f-bomb ranting. Maybe it was an homage. But more likely it was just Ozzie Gui...
Who's Sorry Now? Rocket Edition
Nowhere in the recorded history of regret has there been a more hang-dog expression than this. Hasn't Roger Clemens suffered enough? Just look at him. The round head that reminds you of the boulder that chased Indiana Jones. The pale skin that reminds you of the moon. The furrowed brow where he keep...
The Buzz Bissinger Affair, In Song (And I Feel Fine)
It's The End Of Sports News As We Know It [YouTube]...
Fred Lynn Is America's Fishing Buddy
Former major leaguer Fred Lynn is probably one of the nicest guys on the planet. He's a man who's brimming with self-contentedness and is disarmingly friendly. After you speak with him for two minutes, it's no surprise that seemingly every dude who grew up in New England in the past 40 years is so o...
Anti-Meth Ads, Sports Style
So you know those terrifying Montana anti-meth ads that were recently taken off the air?. Well, in an inspired bit of dark whimsy, The Great Barstoolio had put together a sports compendium of the ads....
On Race, Message Boards And Shutting The Hell Up
Of all the panels on "Costas Now" the other night, the one we thought was most effective at tickling the cerebral cortex was the last one, about race, featuring Cris Carter, Michael Wilbon and Jason Whitlock. (It was so absorbing that "Costas Now" is doing a full 90-minute segment just on race down ...
Tim Tebow Has A Steady Hand, We Hope
Florida quarterback Tim Tebow is an amazing, versatile quarterback, able to chuck a pass 50 yards, turn the corner and a linebacker and plow over undersized defensive lineman. He's a Renaissance Man, a do-gooder, a man of America. His skills run deep. How deep? Trust us, you don't want to know....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while doing a little post-Derby laundry... • Sunday Night Baseball: St. Louis Cardinals vs. Chicago Cubs. Finally, an end to the early May logjam atop the NL Central! [ESPN] • Drag Racing: NHRA Midwest Nationals, Final Eliminations from Madison, IL. This midwestern bias is getting out...
Gussying Up the WNBA's Rookie Class
The WNBA, like other professional leagues, holds an annual orientation for their new rookie class. Unlike other professional leagues, this orientation featured courses on hairstyles, makeup tips, and other non-pillow fighting related slumber party activities....
Cesc Fabregas Is Flaming
Take note Chicago Fire, that is how you're going to put asses in the seats....