w Page 4986 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I'm Your Beer Bong Man, Stop Me As I'm Passing By
Last year on Opening Day, the Milwaukee Brewers faithful unveiled the beer pong orgy. This year they've made it a more intimate occasion, ensuring that each and every Brewers fan gets adequately blasted. Bringing the love back into binge drinking, now that's what it's all about....
Bill James's Steroid Accusations Have Higher Range Factor Than Canseco's
By now even most casual baseball fans know the story of Bill James. Baseball thought of stats one way, he thought of them another, using complex equations using the quadratic formula and integrals and grep. Easy enough. But perhaps Mr. James has another e=mc² up his sleeve when it comes to the way w...
Fiery NASCAR Crash Was The Work Of Scheming Terrorist Fire Ants
You always wondered if NASCAR drivers could turn right. Well, they can, but only once. The twisted remains of the vehicle you see here belonged to Michael McDowell, who rubbed the wall the wrong way (too hard, and straight on) in qualifying for this week's Samsung 500 at Texas Motor Speedway. But no...
About Last Night ...
What you missed, other than the diapered monkey in traffic ... • NBA: Nets playoff chances, fade to black. Detroit's bench handles New Jersey, 106-87. • MLB: Marcum zero, Smokey. Shaun Marcum retires 11 Sox in a row in Toronto's win over Boston. • Tennis: Andy Roddick loses to Nikolay Davydenko in s...
Matt Leinart Suddenly Dirty
• Opening Day! • President Bush would have been a better commissioner. • Look: Daulerio works here now. • Matt Leinart once, and Matt Leinart twice. • Andy Roddick, doing OK for himself. • We miss Davidson already. • Stuart Scott on the microphone. • Joel Zumaya, bringing rock. • Larry King really, ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after discovering a new definition of nightmare fuel ... • Boxing: Heavyweights, Jason (Hunchback) Estrada vs. Lance (The Boston Bleeder) Whitaker, in Lincoln, R.I. (9 p.m., ET) [ESPN2] • NBA: San Antonio Spurs vs. Utah Jazz (8 p.m., ET), Dallas Mavericks vs. Los Angeles Lakers (10:30 ...
NCAA Pants Party: Final Four
All right, well, the games finally tip back off tomorrow, and it's about time: Without any major storyline — The Chalk Bracket just doesn't tend to inspire people — it's been a bit of a slog this week....
Posing As An Unknown ESPN Analyst Not The Way To Score Teens
That man to your right is ESPN college basketball analyst Mark Adams. Some of you may recognize him; most of you may not. That still didn't stop a 48-year-old New Jersey man from posing as Mark Adams in a failed attempt to shack up with a teenage girl....
The Best $187 Million Ever Spent
As Isiah Thomas and the Knicks attempt to finish up their disastrous season and wait to find out what new GM Donnie Walsh will do to rejuvenate the team, it'd probably be a good idea to make sure he doesn't read this Portfolio.com article on how much Isiah has cost the Knicks. The magazine estimates...
Perhaps The Duke Hatred Has Gone Too Far
Buried in a fun interview with Slate sports editor Josh Levin was this amazing tidbit about the Washington Wizards' promotional team:...
The Usual Dash Of Dollar Dog Night Bacchanalia
Wednesday night at the Philadelphia Phillies Citizens Bank Park marked opening night and its first official "Dollar Dog NIght" promotion, which culminated in a Phillies 1-0 loss and, as usual, another mesmerizing display of shit-faced chaos courtesy of the revved-up monkeys. Ever since the Phillies...
Benny The Bull: Free At Last!
Displaying the kind of investigative moxie that could have kept us out of this whole Iraq mess, the Chicago Sun-Times dug into Thursday's Benny the Bull T-shirt assault story and discovered that Benny had been wrongly accused! On Thursday it was reported that Benny — the costumed mascot for the Bull...
Storming The Floor's Final Four Preview
Storming The Floor looks at the Final Four, which tips off tomorrow. Oh, and this South Park "photo" of the coaches is from Gutty Little Bruins, which is probably why John Calipari looks a little off....
40 Acres And A Mountaineer
University of Michigan football coach Rich Rodriguez is still in a messy legal battle with his former team, West Virginia University, about his old contract and the upcoming trial could possibly get ugly. The issue? The legality of the $4 million buyout Rodriguez's team of hard-nosed attorneys alleg...
Don't Even THINK About It, Brett
You know, this is gonna come as a shock to you — and we do hope you are sitting down — but apparently Brett Favre (seriously!) turns out (you ready?) to be (here it comes!) thinking of unretiring. We know, right?!...
Terror From The Sky At Fenway Park
It may seem as if I'm writing this post under the influence of peyote, and believe me, I'm not above trying that. But in this case I'm sober and it's all true: A girl who was part of a school group touring Fenway Park on Thursday was attacked by a red-tailed hawk, who delivered a decisive hawk beat-...
Steve Lyons Would Like To See Your Breasts, Please
Here's an odd little story, featuring current Dodgers broadcaster Steve Lyons and a big-bosomed lady named Stacey Roy. From a court document filed on March 9, Stephen J. Lyons v. Fire Insurance, suggests that this is just a messy little money squabble between an ex-athlete and his homeowners insuran...