w Page 5119 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Florida State Prepares For Boston College... By Thumping Some Black Frat Boys?
Details are still sketchy at this point, but apparently there was a little brouhaha on the campus of Florida State University yesterday and we don't want to alarm you ... but the football team may have been involved. Campus police say about ten individuals were involved (including at least two women...

Please Do Not Approach The Tigermobile
This is purported to be the sweet ride of one Willy-Mo, aka William Moore, senior safety for the Missouri Tigers; although judging from the photo below, it may be someone else's. At any rate, I don't know where this was taken, but it doesn't seem like it's a great part of town. In fact, according to...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you move on with your life after politics ... • College Football: Central Michigan Chippewas at Northern Illinois Huskies (8:00 p.m., ET) Fire up, Chips! [ESPN2] • NBA: Doubleheader: Portland Trail Blazers at Miami Heat (8:00 p.m., ET); Houston Rockets at Phoenix Suns (10:30 p.m....

Let Taxidermy Bring Out The Wildcat In You
Black Friday will be upon us soon and before you know it you will be huddled under blankets outside a Wal-Mart at four in the morning, begging the retailer to give you the honor being kicked in the head for a $10 DVD player. (Excuse me: "home entertainment system.") But why not avoid the muss and fu...

Terrell Owens, Comedian
I did not see last night's "Late Show with David Letterman" (so late!) so I missed this appearance by everyone's favorite vaudeville joke-maker and occasional wide receiver Terrell Owens. We also lost our copy of "Little T Learns To Share," but we think this Top Ten list sends pretty much the same m...

Fun With Babies: More Horrifying Tales From The Phillies Parade
Just like Vietnam, it may be decades before the entire tragic picture of the Phillies victory parade finally comes into focus. More disturbing details emerge each day, including this video, in which this excitable Phils fan can't stop fist-pumping, and in the process nearly jettisons his kid. But...

Red Wings Fan Attempts To Jinx Penguins With Lions Shirt; Results Predictable
Red Wings fan Rick Finn here decided his team needed a little something extra going into last night's showdown with the Penguins, so he hatched an ingenious plan. He had an opportunity to pose with the Stanley Cup in Traverse City, Mich., on Labor Day, and decided to try and put a hex on Sidney Cros...

The World Cup Is Closer Than You Think
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject : Morning crap This unknown player for one of Turkey's national soccer teams (its World Cup roster lists Semih Şentürk, 25, a striker, as No. 9) can't be worried about FIFA politics; he's involve...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you get choked up over a damn space robot ... • College Football: Ball State Cardinals at Miami Red Hawks (7:00 p.m., ET) I still think PCs are better than MACs. [ESPN2] • Cards: World Series Of Poker, Final Table (9:00 p.m., ET) I wonder who wins? [ESPN] • Movie: "Midway" (8:00 ...

Piazza Convinces Publisher That His Life Story Is Entertainingly Heterosexual
One of my good friends from high school had the opportunity to work out with the Dodgers during spring training in the mid-90s. He said the experience in the locker room was memorable because Ramon Martinez swung his penis around like a gangster's pocket watch and that Mike Piazza had the most disgu...

The Patriots Public Relations Department Has Had a Busy Week
Poor Stacey James. Fresh off of the Caitlin Davis fiasco from last week, the Patriots executive director of PR has found himself answering more uncomfortable questions about persons loosely affiliated with the team. This week, it's Marblehead High School Coach, Doug Chernovetz (pictured), who was aw...

Yep, That's A Late Hit
Crowd noise can be a problem when you're on the road, but sometimes it affects the home team as well. Like when you're blitzing the quarterback and you don't hear the refs blow the play dead and suddenly you find yourself "unabated to the quarterback." And then, maybe you break his collarbone. It h...

Barack Obama Will Not Take Away Your Ties Or Your Hair
I don't remember where I saw it, but about a year-and-a-half ago, in one of those "Hey, there's a cool black guy running for President!" stories, the writer posited that Barack Obama, if he were to somehow win (crazy!), would have something immediately in common with John F. Kennedy: He could destro...

ESPN Creates Poker Drama, Then Spoils It For Everyone
ESPN has spent months building up to tonight's broadcast of the final table of the World Series of Poker. They even convinced organizers to take an unprecedented 117-day break before settling the final table so that they could broadcast a "plausibly live" show tonight, just hours after the champion ...

Saying Farewell To The Tuba Man
Seattle is known for its characters, from the guy who waited in line outdoors for four months to see one of the Star Wars prequels, to artists who create giant freeway trolls, the city has always embraced the odd and the colorful. But one of those unique voices has been silenced, sadly. I used to se...

Obama Received No Mandate In Death Valley
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject : Morning crap Lest we think that LSU fans were totally focused on hating Nick Saban and Alabama this past Saturday, please remember that The Pelican State is also very red. Can a lone fan cry ou...

Ha! I Can Never Be Tackl ... Ohhh, Mommy!
This youngster here is obviously a fan of the classic, straight-ahead running style of now-retired Dolphins running back Larry Csonka. Ouch. I should have listened to mom when she suggested beginning golf. The question is, which hit was bigger: This one, or the one levied by the Eagles' Chris Goc...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you try in vain to return that broken eyePod ... • NCAA Basketball: Presbyterian Blue Hose at Duke Blue Devils (7:00 p.m., ET) Devils vs. an entire religion? I like those odds. [ESPNU] • NFL: Monday Night Football: San Francisco 49ers at Arizona Cardinals (8:30 p.m., ET) Pro foot...

Five Holes-In-One In One Week: Shenanigans?
My grandpa averaged about two rounds of golf a week for close to thirty years and one time, when he was in his late sixties, he finally nailed a hole-in-one. It was a pretty big deal, as most things are when you wait most of your adult life for them to happen. He got a trophy and everything. So it's...

The Continuing Saga of One Online MMA Community and an Angry Martial Artist Pestering Rick Chandler
A little less than a month ago, you may remember the story about MMA fighter Lloyd Irvin and how he disarmed an intruder at his family's home using a fancy sambo technique. In the initial post that Rick wrote, he was skeptical about the report, which resulted in a few testy email exchanges with Mr. ...