w Page 5213 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fired Up, Ready To Go
• Goodbye, Oddsmaker. • Jose Lima is indestructible. • LSU won. • Eli Manning, fired up, ready to go. • GOOSE. • Darren McFadden, scufflin'. • Joe Gibbs, hangin' 'em up. • Warren Sapp claims he hates gay porn. • Len Pasquarelli is a friendly sort. • Everyone is always wrong. • We finally got around ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while playing with your Mr. Potato Head ... • NBA: Miami at New Orleans (8 p.m., ET); Milwaukee at Los Angeles Lakers (10:30 p.m., ET) [ESPN]. Visit the famed French Quarter before the game. And there's one in New Orleans too, I hear. • Boxing: Super middleweights, Edison Miranda "Righ...
NFL Divisional Pants Party: Cowboys Vs. Giants
You know what would really blow people's minds? If Jessica Simpson would have dated Eli Manning instead. Man, those guys would have some scintillating conversations....
Smith Street (NSFW)
This is AJ Daulerio's final Cultural Oddsmaker for Deadspin. Email him to let him know what you think....
Strahan Would Totally Tap That
At first glance it's moral support from an unlikely source: Giants defensive end Michael Strahan says that Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson should be given their space. Leave Romo alone! He's a human being! Etc., etc. But you and I know what the real deal is here. Hey Tony, if you ever get tired of her...
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
It's Hard Out There For A Billiken
To put Saint Louis University's loss to George Washington on Thursday into perspective, portly coach Rick Majerus himself could have played point guard for the Billikens, and it wouldn't have hurt. Final: GW 49, Saint Louis 20. That's the lowest total for an NCAA men's team since the shot clock was ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after more interactive fun with tigers ... • College basketball: West Virginia at Louisville (7 p.m., ET); Illinois at Wisconsin (9 p.m., ET); [ESPN]; Arkansas at Auburn (9 p.m., ET) [ESPN2]. This young, scrappy Illini five just could win it all if they figure a way to tickle the nets ...
NFL Divisional Pants Party: Patriots Vs. Jaguars
It's always nice to see the NFL adopting baseball's strategy of scheduling the most exciting postseason games really late at night. Though we might just be getting old....
It Is Time, Once Again, To Wank For A Cause
It's the news you dared not hope was true: Nearly 10 years after it was introduced in San Francisco, the Masturbate-A-Thon is making its triumphant return. To The Netherlands! What took you so long, Dutch people? (Carl Monday dons raincoat, sounds the Action 4 News Team alert). Oh, like you had anyt...
The Burnley Bee Will Not Tolerate Nakedness
Look, from now on, when a costumed bee tackles a naked man during an English League soccer match — and then does about a half-hour Bee Victory Dance to celebrate the feat — I want to be informed immediately. I'm just seeing this now? Inexcusable. Hirshey, or someone, will pay. Now, on with the show....
Warren Sapp's Worst Thing In The World
Remember when Warren Sapp was relevant? OK, we don't remember that either. Anyway, the guy has finally retired, flipping out in his next to last game, just for good measure. What was the tipping point of his rage? Why, gay porn, of course!...
Brady Quinn's Unfortunate Circumstances
With the news yesterday that the Browns are looking to sign Derek "Horse Balls" Anderson to long-term contract, we look ominously to a future that, sadly ... could be Brady Quinn-less....
Divisional Playoff Cranium!
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....
NFL Divisional Pants Party: Packers Vs. Seahawks
OK, everyone, it's the best football weekend of the year. Seriously: Four awesome games, all weekend. What more could someone want?...
Attention Oprah's Book Club: The New Reggie Bush Tell-All Is Here
Not in time for Christmas, darn it, but sure to make for cozy fireside reading nonetheless; the new Reggie Bush book, Don Yaeger's Tarnished Heisman, is here. Is this the Game of Shadows of college football? There's apparently enough evidence of financial impropriety involving Bush at USC to make th...
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
About Last Night
What you missed while stumping for votes at the Nevada caucus (playing blackjack) ... • NBA: When the Celtics lose, it's news. When they lose to the Bobcats, it's big news. • College basketball: Isn't "7-foot-7 giant" redundant? Know any 7-foot-7 dwarves? Anyway, North Carolina 93, UNC-Asheville 81....