war Page 204 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here's Video Of Brett Favre Throwing A Little White Ball Hard In A Town Called Pearl
There's a place where Brett Favre is still adored and revered and considered a legend worthy of a standing ovation. So, of course he went there. Even threw out the first pitch of the Southern Miss Golden Eagles/Tulane game in the Conference USA Tournament "at the T.P."...
More Bad Madness On The Sepp Blatter Campaign Trail
A week before FIFA's presidential elections, another evil-smelling troll has escaped from the basement of Sepp Blatter's Swiss chalet. The current source of horror: Mohamed bin Hammam, Blatter's rival in the elections, was charged yesterday with offering bribes to members of the Caribbean Football U...
Jason Kidd Recorded A Rap Song, "What The Kidd Did," After The Kidd Did College
Jason Kidd recorded this song for a 1994 album called B-Ball's Best Kept Secret, a title that sounds as bad as the idea itself (one unspoken rule about basketball is that thou shalt never refer to it as "b-ball" with a straight face). The collection paired NBA players with producers and rappers to...
Hines Ward, NFL's Dirtiest Player And Dancer, Almost Paralyzed His Tango Partner This Week
Hines Ward unintentionally body-slammed his partner, Kym Johnson, during a rehearsal for the show Dancing With The Stars last week. She suffered a sprained vertebrae and returned for what could only have been an "emotional" and "teary" and "inspiring" performance with Ward — and, having survived a...
If Watching White Dudes Trying To Dance In Unison Is Your Thing, This Is The Video For You
The highlight of this video, which would never have been made if not for the mental defect which convinces most baseball players they're totally awesome and funny and kings of the world, comes at the 2:30-2:34. Because slo-mo footage of toast actually is awesome....
Sepp Blatter Says FIFA Will "Be Sucked Into A Black Hole" If Sepp Blatter Is Not Reelected FIFA President
Sepp Blatter, the international dictator disguised as FIFA president, wrote a letter to Italy's La Gazzetta dello Sport this week to warn the world that a failure to reelect him to a fourth term on the June 1 vote "could cause a tectonic movement with irreversible damage." Let's defer to him to set ...
Dwight Howard Went To Disney World Anyway
The Magic were upset by Atlanta in the first round, but Dwight Howard, the broadest-shouldered 13-year-old trapped in a 25-year-old's body on planet earth, would not let it ruin his trip to Disney World last weekend. Until, at least, a few days later, when he found the time to call out the Orlando S...
Watch Super Middleweight Arthur Abraham Hit People Terrifyingly Hard
So there's this super middleweight title fight on Saturday between Andre Ward (23-0) and Arthur Abraham (32-2) at the Home Depot Center in Carson, California. The bout is part of a Showtime tournament called the Super Six World Boxing Classic, which is supposed to unify the WBC and WBA titles. War...
Try To Look Surprised: England Says World Cup Voters Asked For Bribes
Ever since the good, godfearing Anglo nations were shut out of the 2018 and 2022 World Cups, rumors have flown that Russia and Qatar bribed their way to the top. No one would be surprised because it's FIFA, but it was also sour grapes. And maybe it still is, but this time England is naming names....
By The Looks Of Things, The Texas Rangers Mascot Is Hung Like The Palomino Horse It Purports To Be
Your morning roundup for May 7, the first Saturday after the gays seized control of Atlantic City....
Dance Show Contestant Hines Ward Sees Nothing Newsworthy About Getting Cuffed At Gunpoint Today
Hines Ward, who guest blogs about Dancing With The Stars for the Los Angeles Times, was driving home from a late dinner through North Hollywood early this morning when he "was briefly detained at gunpoint in a mix-up over a reported stolen car." Seems as if his ladyfriend (or friend who happens to ...
Charlie Bell's Love-Advice Videos Are Strangely Poignant Now That His Wife Is Charged With Stabbing Him
Golden State backup guard Charlie Bell has a bizarre web series called the "Truth Doctor" in which he doles out love advice to the masses (relatively speaking: most clips get about 500 views) and takes people on tours of his sparse apartment. Another interesting tidbit about Charlie Bell: his wife...
Tinfoil Hatters Have Something To Talk About For Man U-Chelsea
That's referee Howard Webb over there. A photoshop of him actually, because he doesn't really wear a Manchester United kit while refereeing. He wears a referee's shirt. After a controversial FA Cup match in January, with some controversial decisions going United's way, Liverpool player Ryan Babel po...
Jack Edwards's Baffling Pro-Boston, Anti-Royalty Rant
Noted homer Jack Edwards probably couldn't sleep last night after his beloved Bruins came back to oust the Canadiens in 7 games. But before tossing and turning with visions of Jozef Stümpel dancing in his head, he had some parting words on the NESN postgame show....
Kurt Warner Talks Dancing, Theodicy On His <em>Good Day L.A.</em> Interview
Of all places for Kurt Warner to get backed up against a wall, and then repeatedly and viciously head-butted about his religion, a Good Day L.A. interview was not our first guess. But yesterday, the former NFL quarterback and born-again Christian joined Jillian Reynolds, Steve Edwards, and Dorothy...
Star Of <i>Fred Claus</i> Points And Laughs At Four-Time NHL All-Star
Your morning roundup for April 20, the day we started buying all of our heroin on Craigslist....
With Apologies To Jack Edwards, This Junior Hockey League Announcer Is The Homer To End All Homers
After reading our post about Jack Edwards's deliciously biased Bruins coverage, reader Kenn sent us this excellent clip from a junior hockey league in Texas. In it, the announcer completely loses his shit, tries to calm himself down, and then loses his shit all over again. It sounds like he's cove...
Jack Edwards: Homer To End All Homers
Last night, NESN's Jack Edwards reminded us that he is still the ultimate homer of the hockey commentating world — hockey's Tommy Heinsohn, if you will. In Game 3 of the Bruins-Canadiens series, Edwards screamed at Montreal's Roman Hamrik to "GET UP!" after he tackled Michael Ryder to the ice. He ...
Putting The NHL's TV Deal With Versus In Context
The NHL is set to announce the terms of their renewed contract with NBC and Versus today, for upwards of $200 million a year. (Multiple sources say it's a 10-year deal.) That sounds like a lot of money, or not a lot of money, depending on who you talk to. Versus also sounds like the best home for ho...
Floyd Mayweather Accompanied 50 Cent To Fight Night At Foxwoods And All He Got Was Booed
Your morning roundup for April 17, the day burglars everywhere accept the fact that trying to rob 81-year-old stroke victim/Korean vet Bobby Smith means they'll get a piping-hot frying pan filled with potatoes across the head....