washington Page 123 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Everyone's Overqualified To Cover The Nats, But Especially This Guy
Because Nationals Park is more hazardous and soul-numbing than Helmand Province, the Washington Post's new beat writer is a Pulitzer Prize winner. I'd rather be that Pulitzer winner who got laid off. [WaPo]...
If The Nets Lose And No One's Around To See It, Does It Still Count In The Standings? (Yes.)
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Caps Fan Doesn't Actually Know Size Of Jordan Staal's Penis
It looked for all the world like that fan was impugning the, uh, curve of Staal's stick. Not so. Now we get the real story....
It's The Feud With A Combined ERA Over 5.00
Would a player intentionally suck to become a part of history? The pitcher who let Barry Bonds set the HR mark says no; his teammate says yes. Join us this week, on As The Nationals Turn....
Javaris Crittenton Pleads Guilty To Gun Charge, Gets Probation
The Washington Wizards guard plead guilty to a misdemeanor weapons charge today—as opposed to the felony weapons charge handed to Gilbert Arenas—and will get one year of probation and a fine. Don't worry, it gets weirder....
Conan Plays The Lovable Loser, But On The Court As Well?
Conan O'Brien might have some downtime coming up. So the Washington Generals, they of the decades-long losing streak, have reached out and offered him a starting spot....
Gilbert Arenas Charged With Gun Felony
Prosecutors have filed one count of felony gun possession against Gilbert Arenas, in what looks to be the first stage of a plea agreement. Police are actively searching for Javaris Crittenton's gun too. [WashPost]...
The 2009 Washington Redskins: A Season Of Failure
The Washington Redskins are a franchise that has seen better days, but a decade under a tyrannical, greedy, and possibly imbalanced owner has left fans with the sinking feeling that they may never see those days again....
Wizards Now Pretending Gilbert Arenas Never Existed
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
<em>Forbes</em> Wins The Race To Declare NBA Players "Thugs"
And there it is, right on time. "Many NBA players carry guns and the league is full of thugs," according to something called Michael Ozanian, national editor at Forbes, of all places....
Arenas-Crittenton Standoff Just A Hilarious Inside Joke Gone Awry
Everyone is still trying to make sense of the Washington Bullets' (redux) guns-a-blazin' locker room showdown, but according to the latest version it simply resulted from a misinterpreted zinger about attempted murder. Some people have no sense of humor....
Zorn Officially Out
Guess no one told the Redskins that they could sleep in today. Jim Zorn was escorted from the building at 4:45 a.m. this morning and Bruce Allen didn't even buy him breakfast. [ESPN]...
The Zorn Nonentity
As I write this, the Redskins are playing for pride and their jobs...and are struggling against Billy Volek and the Charger subs. It's time for Jim Zorn to pay the piper....
Gilbert Arenas Is Just Unloading About EVERYTHING On Twitter Right Now
Spurred by the "media outside his house," the Wizards' eccentric guard accused of pulling a gun on his teammate, is sharing some candid thoughts about that — and the rumors about Shaq sleeping with his fiancee. It's quite a show....
Gilbert Arenas And Teammate In Gun Standoff (UPDATE)
It's barely 2010 and already this year has exceeded my expectations: Wizards guard Gilbert Arenas reportedly drew a fucking gun on teammate Javaris Crittenton, who did likewise. From the NY Post:...
Dan Snyder, Genius
The Redskins make more money than any other professional sports franchise. This comes as disappointing news to Washington fans who secretly hoped the team would move and they could start over. [Newsweek]...
Of Ridiculous Contracts And Insubordination
The two highest paid players in their respective sports threw hissy fits and were sent home. One will play today; one might not play again. Want to guess which is which? (Hint: the one who's actually still good will play.)...
Tiger Woods and Mike Wise Cheated on People. Have You?
"I am Tiger Woods," writes Mike Wise in a bracing column in today's Washington Post, "and I have poked fun at his travails because I use humor as camouflage." Not anymore....
Armed Agent Zero Confuses Wizards With Bullets
We interrupt your Christmas caroling for this: Gilbert Arenas is under NBA investigation for stashing firearms in his locker. Apparently, that might violate the league's gun policy. Plus, Washington D.C. owns strict anti-gun laws. What's the excuse?...
This Is Not How A Human Leg Is Supposed To Bend (Update)
Gruesome, gruesome injury for Texas A&M guard Derrick Roland tonight....