we Page 703 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Return Of Pacman, Ocho Bencho, And 'At The Movies' With Tony Romo And A Homeless Guy
• Wait, Is That Pacman Jones' Entrance Music? Adam Pacman Jones is back — a fact which absolutely thrills this particular writer: "The NFL's poster child for foolish behavior is returning to the Cowboys. That's right, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has reinstated Pacman Jones, giving him yet another...
Saying Goodbye To Pete Newell, The Greatest There Ever Was
The two greatest basketball coaches who ever lived are now gone. One you've probably never heard of: George "Bud" Presley, who labored in obscurity for most of his career at a junior college in Atherton, Calif., and who passed away in 2003. But his is a story for another day. Let us talk now of Pete...
Chinese Democracy, 15 Years Down, Five Days To Go
Of all the Guns 'N Roses stories, the "Rocket Queen" one is my favorite. When "Appetite For Destruction" was recorded, the moaning sounds on the album's closer (which might be my favorite G'N'R song, actually), were captured while Adriana Smith, a 19-year-old stripper who had been dating drummer St...
Will Matt Cassel Fetch $10 Million A Year?
Patriots quarterback Matt Cassel, or as we refer to the long-time understudy in my keeper league, "Goddamn Matt Cassel," couldn't have orchestrated a better time for Ton Brady to get injured, as Cassel's contract expires at the end of this season. Rumor has it that Cassel will be seeking "Aaron Rodg...
The Promising Backups That Paved the Way for Matt Cassel's Padded Bank Account
Continuing with our economic theme today, the market outlook seems awfully bullish for New England Patriots backup turned starter Matt Cassel. After his big time coming out party on Thursday night, in which Bill Simmons drunkenly compared him to John Elway, Cassel looks to have set himself up for qu...
A Toast To This Smut-Filled Week of Debauchery
Thank GOD this week is over. Christ. Between going out on dates with dim-witted strippers, gloom-and-doom reports from management, litigious MMA fighters and threats from spatially-challenged U of F co-eds, this week has been a perfect storm of corporate drudgery. Well, not the stripper. But that wa...
The Sabathia Subway Series Has Begun
Both the Mets and Yankees believe that they have one more large object to intsall in their brand new ballparks, and it ain't a deep fryer; although it will consume many, many cheese fries. Today is the day that teams can begin negotiating with free agents from other teams, and both of New York's res...
The Packers Are One Step Closer to that Second Round Draft Pick
Last night's ridiculous Jets-Patriots battle in Foxborough turned out to be everything a football fan could hope for , with the requisite Favreian/Spygate intrigue thrown in for good measure. But even though Favre ended up on the winning end of things and played a mistake-free, efficient game, it wa...
Terrell Owens, Comedian
I did not see last night's "Late Show with David Letterman" (so late!) so I missed this appearance by everyone's favorite vaudeville joke-maker and occasional wide receiver Terrell Owens. We also lost our copy of "Little T Learns To Share," but we think this Top Ten list sends pretty much the same m...
The Patriots Public Relations Department Has Had a Busy Week
Poor Stacey James. Fresh off of the Caitlin Davis fiasco from last week, the Patriots executive director of PR has found himself answering more uncomfortable questions about persons loosely affiliated with the team. This week, it's Marblehead High School Coach, Doug Chernovetz (pictured), who was aw...
Barack Obama Will Not Take Away Your Ties Or Your Hair
I don't remember where I saw it, but about a year-and-a-half ago, in one of those "Hey, there's a cool black guy running for President!" stories, the writer posited that Barack Obama, if he were to somehow win (crazy!), would have something immediately in common with John F. Kennedy: He could destro...
Week In Review: Don't You Wish We All Could Be As Happy As Baby Mangino?
Here are some of this week's stories that didn't have anything to do with Caitlin Davis. • The Brady Quinn era begins...with a loss • How to open a beer with ...Nazi shark! • Joey Porter: professional trash talker • More trouble for the Olson family.• Barack Obama is elected: Some surprisingly good ...
And At Week's End, The First Chapter In The Caitlin Davis Penis-Drawing Kerfluffle Comes To A Close
The story of young Ms. Caitlin Davis is a sad one, as the once wholesome New England Patriots' cheerleader went from budding pom-pom sweetheart of Foxboro to loathsome alleged Anti-Semite, both nationally and internationally, in a short period of time. (So sayeth the Italians: "Caitlin nei fotogramm...
Masking Tape, An Inebriated Friend, And The Shocking Discovery Of Boyfriend Internet Porn
Once upon a time, a site called The Black Table had a regular feature entitled Waxing Off, in which women gathered in an online roundtable to discuss issues of the day, and also to make fun of Will Leitch's shoes. And so we got to thinking: With so many great female sports bloggers out there, why no...
Caitlin Davis Talks to TMZ, Assures The World She's No Anti-Semite, Penis Artist
Well, this is interesting. Recently fired Patriots cheerleader Caitlin Davis has apparently spoke to TMZ to reiterate her statement she that was NOT the person responsible for drawing swastikas all over the drunk kid on the futon. Ms. Davis told them, via email, that there's a simple explanation as ...
The Patriots Dole Out Their Swift, Kraftian Justice, Thus Ending The Short Career of One Cheerleader
Caitlin Davis, the 19-year-old Patriots cheerleader who was featured in this Deadspin item, photographed with a Sharpie in hand, posing over a passed out individual covered in penis drawings was dismissed from pompom duties effective yesterday, according to the Boston Herald. The paper insinuates th...
Election Night: An Excuse To Stay Up Past 8:30
Well, it's here. When I was a kid, Election Night was one of the few nights of the year I was allowed to stay up past 8:30. (Seriously, my bedtime was 8:30 until I was a freshman in high school. And you wonder why I still wet the bed.) I never knew who any of the candidates were, or even what the "...
USC Track Star Learns That You Simply Can't Outrun Bullets
Pictured above is Bryshon Nellum, who runs track for USC. The Halloween party he attended last night didn't go so well. As in, he ended up in the Emergency Room, after getting shot three times in the leg. The good news is that Nellum didn't suffer any life-threatening injuries, and might even race ...
Week In Review: Yes Us Can
We're THIS close to having a new President, people. Four more days! Four more days! OK, I'm shutting this thing down, but not before we review what we've learned this week. • Erin Andrews can tuck me in any time. • Tonight, we're all Phillies fans ... except for that guy in the Padres hat. Let's get...
Awful Announcing's Weekly Media Rundown
Each Friday afternoon Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed during the past week from the world of Sports Media. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....