whimsy Page 101 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Is Why The Internet Wins
In a day inundated with depressing news, it only seems fitting to end it with mindless insanity courtesy of Mr. Ufford at Warming Glow. This is your reward for being respectful today....
Ancient Cheerleader Manual Reveals Secrets To Making Classmates Jealous
You have probably thought about being a cheerleader, but may think that you're right not for the job. Nonsense! If you can speak English, dress appropriately and pretend to like your school, anything is possible!...
Adrian Peterson Does Not Get Hockey
Like many a local celebrity before him, Adrian Peterson was given the honor kicking off the Minnesota Wild game last night with their traditional chant of "Let's Play Hockey." That didn't work out so well....
San Francisco Giants Advertising Copy Written By Giggling 12-Year-Olds
The Giants marketing department will apparently just write anything down on a piece of paper and consider their jobs done. Please leave all "ball"-based puns to the professionals. [Big League Stew]...
Lee Corso. Barry Melrose. Dick Vitale
Who are three people I would not want to see have a Lemon Party? Or, according to Esquire.com, three "men you should emulate." [Esquire.com]...
Martellus Bennett's Blog Is A Thing Of Beauty
Martellus Bennett (no relation) is best known for his fine performance on HBO's Hard Knocks and his ability to rhyme "Romo" with "homo." Now he's a blogger....and he is awesome at it....
Finally, A Video Game That Lets You Use Steroids
New online game from Addicting Games, Baseball Juiced, lets you roid up your players. The game is kind of crappy and doesn't seem to always work ... but maybe that's the point. [Badjocks.com]...
Brewers Fan Saves Bikini Girl From Rogue Home Run Ball
Imagine a young woman innocently sunbathing at a baseball game, when a vicious home run ball comes rocketing toward her unsuspecting frame, with nothing but a bikini top to defend herself? What do you do?!...
Boston Guys: This Woman Could Be Your Wife One Day
There's something so calming about this dimwitted lady's Sisyphean trudge up the down-side of the escalator, undeterred by science, or the thousands of annoyed Bruins fans in her path....
Darren Rovell Vs. The Fifth Third Burger
If that burger had a mouth, it could totally eat him in two bites.Click for the video and watch him eat it in front of Jim Cramer. [CNBC]...
Volleyball Fainter Is Fine, Thanks For Asking
Watching Nikki Allen, USC's director of volleyball operations, talk...stagger...sway...timmm-ber!...is a vintage YouTubian moment which will undoubtedly follow her around for years. Thankfully, she's fine — she was just a little nervous and jet-lagged....
Loyal Fandom, Taunting Or Performance Art?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Sports And Porn, Together Again, As It Should Be
It's time for 20 pictures in which sports and porn collide. Now never send any of these to us ever again. Thanks. [Betfair]...
March Madness Devolves Into All-Out Meat Blogging War
The mainstream media has once again been accused of pilfering from the little guy in his mom's basement, only this time the stakes have been raised dramatically. And so have the steaks....
Concession Stand Bon Vivants: Bow Down To Your New Mexi-Meat Overlord
The minor league West Michigan Whitecaps bring "The Fifth Third Burger" to their concession menu this year. Taste America: 1.66 pounds of beef. Lettuce and tomato. Salsa. Sour cream. Chili. Fritos. [CNBC]...
Tommy Lasorda Can Do This Interview In His Sleep
Tommy Lasorda has an impressive amount of energy for a man his age, but he does seem a little lethargic in this interview—and by lethargic, I mean, he can barely hold his own head up....
Luckily, Brady's Always Spreading Them Around
Those rascals at CBSSportsline are at it again. Always with the dick jokes. Amazingly, that's only the second silliest headline on the page, what with the Martz story and all. [CMSB]...
This Is Why Warm-Up Drills Are Dangerous
Stan Simpson, Illinois frosh, killed in the low post during practice... no, of course he wasn't. But I'm sure his whole face smells like Wilson right now. [The Sports Hernia]...
Working The New Orleans Hornets Halftime Show Is Just Humiliating And Painful
On Tuesday night, the New Orleans Hornets had another halftime spectacle go horribly awry. One of their French Quarter Flyers completely destroyed his ankle during a routine. Photo after the jump — if you dare....
Will Najeh Davenport's Hamper-Pooping Hijinks Hurt His Modeling Career?
I totally missed this on Friday, but Najeh Davenport's days as an NFL running back are seemingly over and he's now looking to start a new career as a professional model. Fantastic....