x Page 864 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
We've Found The Lass Responsible For The Lone Amstel Light On The Bruins' $156,000 Bar Tab
When the Bruins threw down with an epic body count at their Stanley Cup celebrations at Foxwoods, the world was drawn not to the six-figure bottle of champagne: Armand de Brignac is so played out. Instead it was the solo Amstel Light, a beacon of moderation and taste in a storm of crapulence. ...
The Amarillo Sox Did Not Expect Their New Mascot To Have A Huge Erection
The Amarillo Sox Sock is dead. Long live the Amarillo Sox Sock....
One Armand De Brignac Midas Bottle For £120,000! An Unscientific Analysis Of An Enormous Johnson's Epic Bar Tab In London
Atlantic City casino scourge Don Johnson (not to be confused with 80s-era TV scourge Don Johnson) must have seen the damage the Bruins did in the MGM Grand bar in Foxwoods recently. He must have burned with envy. For those of you unaware, Don Johnson has earned the dubious moniker of "The Champagne ...
Hunt For Beejoli Shah, Fabulist Author Of Viral "Quentin Tarantino Sucked My Toes!" Story Begins (UPDATE)
So, friendsicles: how many of you had the email from "beejoli" forwarded to you this morning and have subsequently sent it along to others? Dozens, I bet. Thousands even. Dozens of thousands probably. Its veracity is still unknown but I know Gawker is dutifully trying to track down "beejoli" to see ...
What's The Best Way To Clean Up Spooge After Bareback Sex?
Hey, I'm some lady. I'm filling in for that guy you like, who is on vacation, which means that he is most likely drinking rum out of a hollow fruit and riding a horse on a beach somewhere right now (romantic!). Speaking of segueing into talking about horses, my main beef with horses is how fragile t...
North Korea Lost To The US Because They Were Struck By Lightning, Says North Korea
In a truly bizarre press conference, North Korea's coach Kim Kwang Min had an excuse for his team's performance that...I don't think I've ever heard before....
What <em>Really</em> Happened When Rex Ryan And His Wife Ran Into Foot Joker Wes Welker
In his book Play It Like You Mean It, Jets head coach Rex Ryan writes that Patriots receiver Wes Welker apologized to him and his wife in Hawaii for his press conference before the AFC divisional playoff game in which he made 11 references to feet. According to one person who witnessed the interacti...
Our Old Friend John Salley Says O.J. Was Innocent
Onetime Deadspin contributor John Salley joined 790 The Ticket's The Jorge Sedano Show for an interview that will air tomorrow morning. In it, Sedano asked Salley who he considered—aside from himself—to be the best thespian/athlete....
The Comeback Pig: Marv Albert, And How To Survive Any Sex Scandal
This month, Marv Albert celebrated his 70th birthday and joined the NFL on CBS. He announced he would leave his gig calling Nets games for the YES Network—he wouldn't have the time. The CBS job "wasn't something I was looking for," Albert said. Marv, at 70, is sports' most sought-after voice, so muc...
You Can Fly Like James Bond In "Thunderball" For The Low, Low Price Of $249
Dave Tuxbury works at a place in the Florida Keys where you can strap on a jetpack like the one Sean Connery used in "Thunderball" and, with the help of 30-foot hoses that use seawater as a propellant, fly like a mechanized falcon. They say it's the only place in the country where one can do this....
Here's Video Of Giovani Dos Santos's Gold Cup Goal That Finished The Americans Off
With remarkable placement and touch, young Giovani Dos Santos scored the final goal of the Gold Cup tournament. It gave Mexico a 4-2 lead that they would keep until the final whistle. Here's a link to video of Pablo Edson Barrera's goal that gave Mexico a 3-2 lead....
Your Gold Cup Finals Open Thread
At stake in tonight's Gold Cup final between the soccer teams of the United States of America and Mexico is a berth in the 2013 Confederation Cup. And bragging rights. And all that. Granted, the USA pretty much dominates El Tri in the land of the free, but Mexico's got itself a worthy side. Then a...
Bernard Hopkins Wore Goofy Glasses To Address The Pennsylvania State Legislature
The Bernard Hopkins Gets Honored By Politicians For Beating Up A Haitian-Canadian Kid Tour rolled into the Pennsylvania State House this week....
A Thrashers Fan Surrounded By Winnipeg Jets Fans At The Draft Tries To Mask His Pain With Smiles, Beers
Your morning roundup for June 25, the day Wade Boggs introduces you to Deputy Stanley, a dimwitted yokel who does battle with Swamp Shark....
Cockblocked By Shrooms!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To Prodigies
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. This week's theme, in honor of Rory McIlroy and Kyrie Irving, is sports prodigies. A note to those two: enjoy this moment. If these stories are any indication, there's a slight chance it won't last....
Kissing Riot Couple's Zapruder Film Proves Their Blissful Moment Was Not Staged
Of course you remember the golden Vancouver riot couple, forever commemorated in this photo, their newfound love a port in a storm of tear gas and riot shields. Well, some folks wrote that the photo might have been staged—it seemed too perfect, too cinematic. We understood. Oh, this postmodern wor...
Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills Ruin NHL Awards With Confident, Butchered Pronunciation
Real Housewives Camille Grammer—Kelsey's ex—and Adrienne Maloof—sister of those bankrupt rich man-children who allegedly own the Sacramento Kings—presented the Lady Byng Trophy to Tampa Bay Lightning right wing Martin St. Louis at Wednesday's NHL Awards show. St. Louis is a six-time All-Star, he w...
"Goddamn It, I'm Rich," Backup Sixers Guard Lou Williams Tells Us In New Rap Video
Some of the players drafted tonight will become stars, despite our dire predictions, some will be busts, and others will forever be NBA rotation guys, the Lou Williamses of the world, who, try as they might, just aren't quite as good as Jrue Holiday....
This Has To Be Among The Funniest Things That Could Happen After Two Motorcycle Racers Crash
During a round of the Promosport Championship at Circuit de Nevers Magny-Cours in France, two riders crashed. Then, their rides decided to start mating. All that's missing is this....