x Page 963 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Buckner's Awkward Re-Return To Fenway
I guess it's not really the appropriate time where you sprint out to the mound, but dude, honestly, he's walking out there like he just let the ball go threw his legs again. Then again ... that is the only reason he's out there. So, in reality, he has to make that long fucking walk again (longer eve...

Sparring With Carl Everett
Being a sports reporter is, at times, an absolutely horrible job. Sure you get to watch games, travel, and interact with athletes, but there is a horrendous downside. (Which is pretty much everything else.) And this is never more disturbingly clear than when a reporter has their first (or 50th ) awf...

Matt Leinart's Actions Make TheDirty.Com Famous
Matt Leinart's stupefying beer-bong partying and champagne-bottle fellatio did nothing to help his career as an NFL quarterback nor his promotional viability, but it did wonders for the Dirty.com. The site, once lost in the overly-crowded co-ed tit-flashing corner of the blog market, reached critica...

Shades Of A Very Expensive 2003
And there it is. The dreaded comparison: "Detroit is 0-5 for the first time since the Tigers dropped their first nine games in 2003 en route to an AL-record 119 losses." For the record, the 2008 Tigers are in no way similar to the 2003 variety, with the exception of players named Brandon Inge, Jerem...

Terror From The Sky At Fenway Park
It may seem as if I'm writing this post under the influence of peyote, and believe me, I'm not above trying that. But in this case I'm sober and it's all true: A girl who was part of a school group touring Fenway Park on Thursday was attacked by a red-tailed hawk, who delivered a decisive hawk beat-...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after bidding on the Miracle Jesus Spoon ... • Boxing: Welterweights, Joshua Clottey vs. Jose Luis Cruz; super welterweights, Yuri Foreman vs. Saul Roman, in New York. (9 p.m., ET). Fisticuffs in Brooklyn? Certainly not. [Versus] • College basketball: National Invitation Tournament, ch...

Ron Mexico's Prison Pen Pal
Considering how much Falcons owner Arthur Blank stuck by Ron Mexico for years, before that dog-fighting business, it should perhaps be little surprise that he's still corresponding with Vick while he's in the slammer. How's he doing, anyway? Has he organized a team to beat the prison guards yet?...

Who Knew Hondas Were So Roomy?
A few weeks ago, there was a message board post about Shaquille O'Neal hopping a ride with a fan (who's apparently named "Donger") from the Suns' parking lot over to his Diesel mobile in the next lot. The veracity of the story was questioned, even though the fan had photographic evidence of the occa...

Red Sox Fans, Spread Among The 100,000. What Could Go Wrong?
We really wish we would have attended the Red Sox-Dodgers exhibition game at the Coliseum last weekend, if just because a fight was inevitable....

It's April Fools In The NBA, Starring The Western Conference Playoff Race
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who just crumpled up his "Western Conference Playoff Position" spreadsheet and ate it. When he's not trying to make heads or tails of this crazy playoff race, you can find him running suicides at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...

Your AL Central "Preview"
All right, well, the season has supposedly started, though rain on Opening Day has to be some sort of cruel trick from God. So let's wrap up the last division....

Shaq's New Diesel
The black Perez Hiltons over at Media Take Out unveiled some photos of Shaq and his post-divorce hook-up, who if memory serves me correct, looks alarmingly similar to Shaq's ex-wife, Shaunie. (It seems Shaq has a thing for cinnamon-colored ladies with Legend of Billie Jean haircuts. )...

Mayweather Practically Unbeatable When Armed With Metal Furniture
Remember the good old days, when boxers waited until they were old and washed up before turning up on the professional wrestling circuit? Of course then you don't make $20 million just for showing up, as Floyd Mayweather did on Sunday at WrestleMania XXIV in a completely legitimate not-at-all script...

Your Texas-Memphis Live Blog
Yes, the string of Texas-themed posts hits three, which hopefully propels someone to beat a No. 1 seed. That, or the 30,000 Longhorn fans in attendance. D.J. Augustin got the best of Derrick Rose last summer, but let's see what becomes of games that matter....

Davidson Is Now Just One Game Away
Storming The Floor looks at last night's Sweet 16 action....

Let The 'Texas Hold 'Em' Trial Begin!
Looking for something to watch when the NCAA Tournament is over? Hope your cable company offers Court TV, because the trial of the decade is about to begin; the case of the Oklahoma Sooners fan who ripped the scrotum of a Texas Longhorns fan in a bar fight. Nancy Grace is working herself into a lath...

Sweet 16 Pants Party: Texas Vs. Stanford
Texas Longhorns (30-6) vs. Stanford Cardinal (28-7) When: 7:27 p.m. ET tonight Where: Houston...

Putting A Foot On WKU's Neck
Storming The Floor looks at last night's Sweet 16 action....

The One Lonely UCLA Fan
There's something we absolutely love about this picture. No matter how well your team's doing, no matter how much fun your friends are having at the game, no matter how young you are and no matter how full of possibilities the planet might seem ... sometimes, when you're having a bad day, you're ha...

China Has Addressed Our Pooping Needs
Breaking news in the Beijing Olympics controversy: They're fixing the toilets. I've prayed for this day (dabs at eye with hankie). It makes sense. The Chinese government realized that if it wants the Olympics to run efficiently, then it needs to address this pressing issue. Simply put, American athl...