yo Page 405 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Darrelle Revis Signs With Jets
According to a tweet from his agents, cornerback Darrelle Revis has signed with the Jets, who he played for from 2007 to 2012:...

Little Russian Soccer Kid Gets Shit Wrecked When Big Coach Kicks Him
Sure, Russia may have their own standards for coaching, child-rearing, and acceptable levels of violence in sports, but a grown man molly-whopping one of his charges right on the pitch, then barking at him to get back in the game has to cross some kind of threshold....

Gronk Twerks At Clippers Game
Muscle-bound toddler Rob Gronkowski attended the Clippers game tonight, and when the Dance Cam trained itself on Gronk as LMFAO played, he refused to dance!...

Hassan Whiteside Ejected After Absolutely Trucking Kelly Olynyk
For the second time in a week, Miami Heat center Hassan Whiteside has gotten himself ejected from a game. In the third quarter against the Celtics tonight, Whiteside rammed over Kelly Olynyk, with seemingly no provocation besides the usual amount of contact between big men that had been going on all...

Ned Yost Is Pretty Bummed Out About That Bee Genocide He Witnessed
A spring training game between the Royals and Angels was delayed on Sunday so that a massive bee hive could be removed from a microphone behind home plate. There were a lot of bees!...

Oklahoma LB Eric Striker To Racist Frat Boys: "Fuck All You Bitches"
The University of Oklahoma's Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity chapter has been shut down after video of members conducting a racist chant surfaced over the weekend. In a Snapchat video that made its way onto the internet, Sooners linebacker Eric Striker shared his furious reaction to the incident...

NYCFC Keeper Josh Saunders Smokes Head Against Goal Post
New York City FC's goalkeeper Josh Saunders suffered this ugly head injury in today's season opener against Orlando City. While corralling a free kick, an opposing player runs into him, carrying him back towards goal where he drills the back of his head into the post. Here's a GIF of the blow:...

Messi Scores 3 But Suárez Leads Barça To Top Of La Liga In 6-1 Win
This is precisely the kind of game Barcelona were hoping to get out of Luis Suárez when bringing him in this summer, and the kind he's been delivering regularly as of late. With his combination of confidence, unceasing work, deadly finishing, and selflessness, he was able to will an unimpressive B...

Tampa Bay Bucs Cheerleaders Win $825K Lawsuit Settlement Against Team
And another one! Following in the footsteps of the Raiders, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers have settled the lawsuit brought by former cheerleaders to the tune of $825,000....

Jets Trade For Brandon Marshall
The Bears have agreed to send WR Brandon Marshall to the Jets, per ESPN's Adam Schefter. The haul hasn't been reported yet (Update: a fifth rounder), but it shouldn't be huge: Chicago was desperate to move Marshall before his $7.5 million guarantee kicked in next week....

Fake Larry Donnell Gets On MSNBC, Says "Fuck Her Right In The Pussy"
Giants tight end Larry Donnell was on the plane that crashed into a fence in New York today. The guy who called into Andrea Mitchell's MSNBC show was not. Guess how the interview ended....

Brian Cashman Says The Yankees Should Retire The Very Idea Of Captaincy
On the radio today, Yankees GM Brian Cashman declared that if it were up to him, the Yankees would never name another captain after Derek Jeter, who was "so perfect" in the role but retired or died or something....

Giants TE Larry Donnell Was On Plane That Skidded Off Runway
A Delta flight from Atlanta to New York skidded off the end of the runway at snowy LaGuardia airport this morning, coming to rest on a berm specifically put there to keep planes from splashing into Flushing Bay. A reported 130 people were board the MD-80, including Giants tight end Larry Donnell, ...

Make Your Bed. Make Your Bed? Make Your Bed!
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....

How To Get Your Ass Back In Shape, And Keep It There
Now that the New Year's Resolutions crowd has cleared out of the gym, it's time to get down to business. The goal is not to become CrossFit truthers or pot-smoking ultramarathoners, but to simply avoid racking up massive medical bills due to poor health as we continue our slow, inevitable march to...

Deadcast: Is Ernie Banks’ Body Being Hidden In Washington, D.C.?
Since Chicago Cubs legend Ernie Banks died over a month ago, his surviving family members have been engaged in a blood feud with Banks's former mistress over both Banks's remaining assets (rumored to be valued at a mere $16,000) and his remains, the location of which are at present unknown. Even th...

Daniel Murphy Disagrees With The Gay "Lifestyle"
New York Mets second baseman Daniel Murphy says that he would be accepting of a gay teammate, but that he “disagree[s] with the lifestyle, 100 percent,” throwing the authenticity of his claimed acceptance into question. ...

David Wright And Bobby Parnell Are Apparently The Mets' Lunch Police
Mets pitcher Noah Syndergaard chose to eat lunch in the clubhouse today during the team's scrimmage. Big mistake. David Wright and Bobby Parnell found out, and threw Syndergaard's lunch in the trash to teach him a lesson....

Jason Smith's Dancing Is The Only Redeeming Thing About The Knicks
The Knicks are bullshit and should be ignored at all costs, but we can make an exception for power forward Jason Smith, who in this video busts out a series of dance moves at an energy level of a Pixie Stick-addled kid who just watched Ace Ventura: Pet Detective....

So This Is How It's Gonna Be For A-Rod, Huh?
Here's the back page of today's Daily News, the morning after the Yankees took part in a six-inning, totally informal, intrasquad "game," without actual human pitchers:...