yo Page 464 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Jaguars Can Still Technically Make The Playoffs
The Jacksonville Jaguars were sucking at a historic rate back when they were 0-8, but after a bye, they've won four of their last five. Somehow, in a complicated scenario, the Jags still technically have a chance of getting a playoff spot. Six teams would have to majorly fuck up and Jacksonville wo...

Drunken SantaCon Brawl Features Six Santas
For the unfamiliar, SantaCon is a holiday bar crawl in which bros dress up like Santa and get shitfaced. When SantaCon winds down and Santas have imbibed more than they can handle, a pedestrian can usually witness Santas puking, sleeping or—in this case—fighting. So get that warm, fuzzy holiday feel...

MLB Investigates Yankees For Potential Tampering With Mike Trout
This seems like a whole lot of nothing, but we can stand behind anything to make baseball's silly season the sillier. Yesterday, Yankees president Randy Levine had this to say by way of explaining why the team was hesitant to give Robinson Cano too many years:...

Report: Knicks Might Try Drafting In The First Round For Once
When the reports started coming down yesterday that the Knicks were seeking Kyle Lowry from the Raptors in exchange for a package including a 2018 first-rounder, it sounded eminently logical. Not in the "that's a smart move" sense, but in the "of course the Knicks are going to give up on a draft tha...

Broadway Danny Rose: It's A Beautiful Thing
We're getting into a definite type of situation here......

Funny As Fuck: Buddy Hackett
Because...well, you need a because for Buddy?...

Dad Saves Daughter From Flying Basketball Player
Well done, Knicksdad! Your paternal instinct to protect your offspring won out over your natural desire to touch a professional athlete. Truly you are the dad of the year. (If you had let her get hurt, the Knicks probably would have given you some signed swag, maybe even free tickets. Next time.)...


This Hilarious Knicks Fan's Rant Is The Epitome Of Knicks Fandom
Believe it or not, the Knicks' 41-point loss to the Celtics this Sunday has at least one fan fed up. This video from said disgruntled fan could be the new manifesto for Knicks fandom nation-wide. While it's probably in some part staged, everything "Billy" says is gospel....

No, ESPN Didn't Accidentally Leak Nick Saban As The New Texas Coach
We received this tip about ESPN using an interesting slug for a story about Mack Brown resigning. (The bookmarks bar is blacked out to hide identity.) Did Nick Saban sign a five-year deal to be the new Longhorns coach? Nah. It's fake....

Derek Jeter Revived A Dying Man With His Handsome Face
Everyone shut up, we have some very important Derek Jeter news to share with you....

Curtis Granderson: "True New Yorkers Are Mets Fans"
Curtis Granderson was officially introduced a Met today, with a four-year, $60 million contract and a preternatural knack for winning over the fans. Within minutes of meeting the media, he tossed some fire on a Yankees-Mets rivalry that only exists on tabloid back pages. ...

Wikipedia vandalism is generally tired, but let's make an exception for James Dolan's band, JD & The Straight Shot. USA Today pointed out some since-corrected Knicks jokes in the song titles, but there are already a few more to replace them. ("Don't Waste My Time I've Got a Team to Run Into the Grou...

Oh Hey, How Often Do You Wash Your Jeans?
Back in October, TMZ reported that Tommy Hilfiger doesn't wash his jeans. Ever. ...

Rob Gronkowski Also Has A Concussion, Is The NFL's Latest Nightmare
When Browns safety T.J. Ward sent his shoulder crashing into Rob Gronkowski's outstretched right leg, everyone had the same two thoughts: "Holy shit, Gronk just tore his ACL!" and "Ward only went low because he didn't want to concuss Gronk and get fined for doing so." Well, try telling that second ...

Swaggy P Swagged A Little Too Hard On This Layup
Kobe Bryant made last night in Los Angeles a memorable one. Just eight months after tearing his achilles tendon, the five-time NBA champion made his heroic return to the court and—-OH SHIT, HERE COMES SWAGGY P....

Yankees Replace Robinson Cano With Carlos Beltran
The Yankees signed Carlos Beltran to a three-year, $45 million deal. Beltran, still willing to cut the Yankees a break, reportedly took $3 million less to sign with New York. In exchange, the Yankees had to budge from the two-year contract they preferred. Who knows if the Yankees are done; according...

Please Don't Ollie The Subway Tracks
Yes, this is cool and terrifying and mesmerizing. But I swear to Subway Jesus, if you miss and hit the third rail and delay my commute, I will piss on your grave....
