yo Page 656 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

World's Best Soccer Player Forms Universe's Worst Bro-Band Tribute Band
It was looking good for futbol to get some American respect. It's looking less good today....

Floyd Mayweather + Don King + Las Vegas = Pictures of Cash Money
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Private Stache: John-John And The Say Hey Kid Share A Tender Moment
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

Man In A Banana Suit Using A Citi Field Urinal? Man In A Banana Suit Using A Citi Field Urinal.
When you're emailed a picture with the subject line "Mets game tonight" and the body reads "Banana suit" and the text is highlighted, you post the picture of the man wearing a banana suit using the urinal at Citi Field....

ESPN Anchor Commits Gaffe. Oh, And He Calls Citi Field "Shitty Field," Too.
Following a look-in to whatever it is that A-Rod was doing, Anish Shroff flubbed sending it back to the announcers at the Mets game, saying, "Let's get you back out to Shitty Field as the Mets threaten [sic] the 8th." How embarrassing!...

A Return From Gentle Path: The Humiliation Of A Sex Addict In Rehab
Several months ago, an anonymous Deadspin reader checked himself into the infamous Gentle Path sex addiction program for 45 days — the same place Tiger tamed his wayward pecker. This is what our writer experienced in his time there....

On The Other Side Of A No-No, Tigers Learn How To Pick Their Battles
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Mite Fight Broken Up By Mommy
These small children — teammates — get into it with a shove and a slash, and one drops the gloves, ready to go. That's when young JJ's mother plays enforcer....

Here's A Trick Shot Mix-Tape Put Together By Some Trick-Shooting Moppets
Chip-shot shot, baseball-bat shot, off-the-curb shot, and countless others? Yes, yes, yes, and yes. The BlakRoc (Black Keys, Mos Def, and Jim Jones) soundtrack is the icing on the cake. [WFNY]...

Live Chat: With This Guy Who's Still Proud He Had Two Bottles of Mad Dog on Call in 1995
A few of you asked for it, so all of you get it....

Prediction for Today's Royals/Yankees Game
Twenty-seven years ago today, this happened ......

NFL Wants To Take Hard-Earned Money From All Those Players Who Shoot Themselves In Bars Or Something
NFL executive vice president Jeff Pash has some serious problems with the current collective bargaining agreement, foremost being that all those football players shooting themselves in bars get to keep their signing bonuses. Outrage!...

Bring Me The Arm Of Lefty O'Doul
In 2007, the arm of a mannequin outside former San Francisco Seals manager Lefty O'Doul's bar was stolen. Yesterday, it came back. Along with a written and photographic record of its three-year hedonistic joyride across the Midwest....

Dumb TV People Interview Thierry Henry, Remind America Why It Can't Have Nice Soccer Things
Click to viewThe newly minted New York Red Bull visited the set of Fox 5's morning show, Chirpy Morons Sit on Sofa and Talk About Vitamins, and submitted to a whole host of indignities. Watch, if you can. [MLS Talk, via @GrantWahl]...

Arizona Lady Emigrates Illegally From Shirt
Maybe Arizona is the lawless hellhole Jan Brewer's made it out to be, after all. Between the Nazis on the borders and the streets becoming sets for an ill-advised No Country For Old Men sequel, the citizens of Arizona now have to worry about the unpatrolled border of this lady's cleavage....

Today In Things Making You Fatter: Baseball
Shocking news out of the halls of SI today: all-you-can-eat deals at baseball games are extremely unhealthy, and teams might have some ethical obligation to stop such promotions. To the pull-quotes!...

Baby Eating Way Out Of Watermelon Encapsulates The Human Cond—Awwwwwww!
Edible time-out? Funtime/dinnertime mashup? Emerging pod person? All we know is—awwwwwww! [via ExtraHotTrainaMustardClicks]...

Best News Lede Ever? Best News Lede Ever.
"Police responded early Friday to a call of shots fired at a home in Roberts and found a man apparently hallucinating an attack by clowns." [Pioneer Press](via DCarr)...

A.J. Burnett is a Liar. He'll Tear Your Heart Up. He'll Burn Your Soul.
Let me tell you a little bit about what A.J. Burnett did on the day Tim McCarver did the right thing by outting the Yankees organization as Nazi Communist airbrush artists....

Tim McCarver: Yankees Front Office Takes After Nazi, Communist Propagandists
Tim McCarver apparently thinks there's a Yankees campaign to remove Joe Torre's Bronx contributions from the annals of history. So, in the fourth inning of Saturday's game against the Rays on Fox, he went all Tim Kampf on viewers....