yo Page 704 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Plaxico Burress Update: He Still Has A Hole In His Leg
Do you remember a couple of years ago when Dick Cheney shot that guy and the basic facts of story were so utterly ridiculous that all you had to do was say "The Vice President of the United States shot a man in the face" and that counted as both a joke and a serious analysis of the situation? That's...

Boom Goes The Dynamite, As They Say
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call will return for a brief period of time through the holidays. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call....

FSU Fan Could Be Charged With Being Cranky, Missing Bedtime
Now this is no home-field advantage oncesoever: when a stray Florida Gators fan broke out the car keys to make noise in the face of an FSU Seminoles (and when the hell did this start? And do Cameron Crazies linger over the BMW keychain as they shake them at UNC fans?) in Tallahassee yesterday, the S...

For Your Viewing Pleasure: How to Stuff a Wild Deadspin
• 3:00 — Movie: In the Valley of Elah [MAX] - Woman stands topless in front of you... "ma'am" could be taken as an insult. • 3:30 — Golf: LG Skins Game, Back Nine [ABC] - After nine holes, Not Tiger is leading Not Tiger while Not Tiger has yet to earn a skin yet. If you're a betting reader, we'd tak...

For Your Viewing Pleasure: It's a Hard-Knock Life for Us
• 12:00 — Movie: Annie [ABC Family] - If your team loses today, you just stick out your chin and grin and say... • 12:00 — Sport: College Football - Georgia Tech at Georgia [CBS] - Stone Mountain will be leveled by the sheer force of will emitted from this game. This will not be enough to convince s...

Lendale White Is Not Impressed With The Lions Tackling Ability
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call will return for a brief period of time through the holidays. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call.Note to television producers: try to keep the sideline microphones away from Titans' running back Le...

Why The Lions Belong On Thanksgiving
The Detroit Lions are (arguably, I know) the worst organization in sports. Their incompetence, from the owner to the fans, is legendary. Yet, tradition dictates that every year, just as families arrive at the homes of relatives they don't particularly care for in order to celebrate this giving of Th...

Citi Field and Manchester United: Your Tax Dollars At Work
The government's bailout of our collapsing financial industry continues apace—you got your check, right?—but now that these companies are playing with our money, suddenly everyone is an expert. Some are suggesting that maybe the reason these firms are in trouble is because they like to waste money a...

Lawrence Tynes To President Bush: Pardon My Brother, Please
Question: Do you know who Lawrence Tynes is without me having to explain that he's the kicker for the New York Giants? Do you think President Bush knows? He did single out Tynes during the Giants post-Super Bowl White House visit, because it was his overtime field goal against Green Bay that sent th...

SHOTY First Round: Roger Clemens Vs. Vince Young
It's the day before Thanksgiving, and it's difficult to imagine much that would be more enjoyable than voting in the 2008 Deadspin Sportshuman Of The Year tournament. Like you're doing any work today anyway. In fact, you're probably not even in the office right now. Are you reading this from the fu...

Ron Artest Unleashes His Unholy Vlog
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call will return for a brief period of time through the holidays. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call. This video was respectfully ganked from the man, the myth, the DUAN albatross...SKEETS. For the who...

A-Rod Not In Touch With His Inner Jewishness
Uh oh, guess who was busted for skipping his Kaballah classes? One Mr. Alex Rodriguez is in so much deep shit with Madonna it's not even funny. MSNBC is saying that the Yankee has cancelled private classes with "spiritual leader" Eitan Yardeni, who was supposed to guide A-Rod around the bases of cos...

He Totally Would Have Made It If He Only Had One Leg
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call will return for a brief period of time through the holidays. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call. I think it's safe to say that anytime you have two bored dudes on a roof, an old basketball hoop, a...

Dude, I Think Stryper Won A Trophy or Something
Michael Bertin writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin. Frankie Hejduk has been in MLS for nine years. He's done five seasons in Europe four of which were with Bayern Levekusen, including the infamous 1999-2000 campaign when the side needed only a draw against tiny Unterhaching on the last day o...

When All Else Fails For The Lions, Might As Well Have a Couple of Fat Guys Fight in the Parking Lot
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call will return for a brief period of time through the holidays. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call. From Sports By Brooks, comes this surprisingly mesmerizing video of a couple of shirtless chubster...

The Jets Fly High Over the Titans
After 12 weeks the Tennessee Titans have joined the ranks of the defeated thanks to (sigh) Brett Favre and the New York Jets. Apparently there's been a rather large puddle of blood on the field stemming from an injury to Albert Haynesworth, and from what I understand there have been no efforts made...

Blame the Wildcat: Favre Is a Wide Receiver and Fisher Is Skydiving...And McNabb Is Benched
Brett Favre learned everything he knows about playing wide receiver from an instructional book written in an obsolete vernacular. And for some reason Jeff Fisher decided to make his arrival at Friday's practice via parachute. Both teams have added field goals since we last checked in, making the sco...

The Jets Try To Steal Perfection From The Titans
Could today be the end of perfection for the Titans? Tennessee faces off against Favre and the Jets at 1:00 and it should be a doozy. Even with Favre's probable interceptions, the Jets should prove to be the Titans biggest challenge so far. For once I'll be rooting for the Jets, as perfection is bor...

Joey Porter Refuses To Stop Talking
Everyone's favorite batshit crazy linebacker, Joey Porter, has graced us with some words of wisdom yet again. In an interview with the South Florida Sun Sentinel, Porter pleads his case on behalf of Michael Vick and pit bulls. When asked if Vick should get a second chance, Porter replied: ...

Jets QB Not Named Favre Suspended For Violating Drug Policy
It is not a good week for back-up quarterbacks. First it was Florida, now the Jets. It seems that Jets Rookie QB Erik Ainge was suspended four games by the NFL on Friday for violating the league’s policy on steroids and related substances. It doesn't seem to be a huge loss for the team: ...