Take This Sabbath Day: The Week In Unintentional Dong Submissions

You were worried, I know. Fear not dongists, we were just a little backed up yesterday and getting back into the swing of things. Without further ado, here is your week(ish) in dong submission. Up first, we have this plant tentacle dong reaching for glorious sunlight, courtesy of reader Max. As always, be sure to support our dong endeavors and send in any would-be penises to the tips department.

Here's a dong shaped hole from some Xbox golf game, as provided by Ben.

Dave went to see Darius Rucker a few months ago and snapped this hootie stage dong. Fine, I'll say it: Hootie songs, like dongs, are not as bad as everyone makes them out to be.

In case you were not convinced this guy was a peeper, the sketch artist drew a little peehole on his hoodie. Thanks for the heads up, Dave.

Reader Eric came across this neck tat dong on the subway. All shapes and sizes on the subway, folks. All shapes and sizes.

Here's a little something for your sweet tooth. Cookie dongs, thanks to Gena.

"I spilt water on my leg and the stain came out quite phallic. I saw it and thought of you guys. -BJ"

Jack sent in this picture of some kind of cutout puzzle deal that eventually becomes a skull. Complete with helpful instructions. Jack, like the rest of us, only sees a dong.

Joey's girlfriend sent him this picture of a piece of chicken slathered in sauce and rice from Panda Express. The ultimate aphrodisiac.

Reader Matt sends along this triumph of marketing—the Bed Head hair stuff-dildo. Well done, wizards.

Here's a venison tenderloin from Peter. That is, like, a quadruple entendre.

I'm only including this one because Rob claims he came across this (questionably) dong-like structure as he was building a 3D model of a flea for a school project for his son. What in the world is going on in our schools today?

This lava lamp dong is mesmerizingly beautiful. Thank you, Rus.

Finally, reader Wayne sends in this ice wang.

Dongs be with you—and also with you.