Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

The Record For Most Land Lubbers In One Place Was Absolutely Shattered Last Night

Your morning roundup for November 12, the day we learned that maybe Atlas just doesn't give a shit. Image via Mocksession. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors.


What we watched: College basketball played on a boat. What a spectacle! I particularly enjoyed ESPN breathlessly telling me approximately six thousand times that history will be/is currently/had been made. Basketball. On a boat! Never before in the history of basketball or boats has this ever been achieved. Just a monumental day—on Veterans Day no less.

It was certainly entertaining to watch, though. You don't get basketball and views of the Pacific very often so it made for a visually pleasing experience. Also, the consensus top team in the nation was playing a Michigan State team that always seems to be around. College basketball is weird, though. The regular season is largely meaningless and, most of the time, boring. There are enough teams playing each week, however, that there always seems to be at least one interesting match up. So, a sort of interesting match up was made HISTORICAL merely by introducing a boat. Good luck topping that, second week of the college basketball season.

In Case You Missed It: "Sandusky wasn't charged in 1998, remember, but he did admit to hugging a boy while showering with him, which he further acknowledged was wrong. In 2001, The Second Mile started paying Sandusky an annual "consulting" fee of $57,000, according to the IRS records. The Second Mile only stopped paying Sandusky in 2009, after the charity also decided to stop Sandusky from camping out with young boys. Even without the allegations that Sandusky used the charity to find victims, this kind of gravy-ladling should make everyone sick. Think of it this way: In eight years, Jerry Sandusky made more money showing up at golf courses and steak dinners than most Americans do working every day." Find everything here.


[Eyes blink several times, gears, springs and bolts suddenly pop out of head]: "'He's certainly turned it around,'' Day said. 'Tiger's known for shoving stuff down people's throats. And he's certainly doing that now. I like the way he's playing. He's got more shots than me in the bag right now, definitely. He hit some shots where I'm just sitting there going, "Wow." I feel like I can play a lot of different shots, but some shots that guy hits are just amazing.''' [ESPN]


Who would have guessed the Australian Open would be such fertile ground?: "[Hunter] Mahan was walking down the 11th fairway at The Lakes, a 577-yard hole that hugs the waters, when he looked back to see Daly pump two shots into the water while trying to reach the green. Then came a third. And a fourth. And a fifth. A sixth. A seventh. 'I was thinking of Bay Hill when he dumped a bunch in the water,' Mahan said. Mahan was still a teenager in Dallas in 1998 when Daly hit six balls into the water on the sixth hole at Bay Hill in the final round and made an 18, the highest score he has recorded. The only thing that kept Daly from breaking his record at the Australian Open was that Daly ran out of balls. He would have been playing his 16th shot. Instead, he motioned to Mahan and Craig Parry, handed over his scorecard and stormed off the course." [USA Today]

Your Invisibility Cloak interlude

Crawling out of the darkness: "Let me make this clear. There is not a single right-thinking Penn State fan who does not acknowledge that the real victims here are the victims of that monster, Jerry Sandusky. There is not a single right-thinking Penn State fan who does not acknowledge that Joe Paterno and Tim Curley and Graham Spanier did not do enough-not nearly enough-to prevent an awful situation from getting even more awful. There is not a single right-thinking Penn State fan who does not understand that Joe had to go, that the entire administration had to go with him, that reparations must be paid, that the university and the university community will have to fight and claw and scrap to earn back any kind of public trust. There is not a single right-thinking Penn State fan who does not understand that enormous, catastrophic, life-changing mistakes were made, and that because those mistakes were made, innocents have suffered. There is not a single right-thinking Penn State fan who is not utterly ashamed to be associated with a small group of men who failed so miserably in its responsibility to protect helpless children. It crushes us. We are devastated. We are saddened. We don't know up from down, to be quite frank, because we have been blindsided. We are just now dragging ourselves up off the mat. But despite our anger and despair and confusion, and despite what you may think about us, we are doing what we can, in the darkness of the moment, to do the right thing. Some of us are raising money. Some of us are advocating for change. Some of us are asking the very questions that need to be asked-about what went wrong, and how, and what we can do, as individuals and as a collective, to never allow anything like this to ever happen again. To anybody." [Intelligent College Football]


World Peace says give labor and solar energy a chance: "Lakers forward Metta World Peace seemed to agree with [Dallas Mavericks guard Jason] Terry, in his own way. 'It's bigger than just a lockout. It's an educational experience,' World Peace said at a promotional appearance for Sungevity, a solar rooftop specialist. 'I went through it twice. I got suspended for how I reacted in Detroit [in the 2004 "Palace Brawl"] and saw they were able to take my paycheck. Now I'm locked out again. I can't receive a check. It's more educational for me than anything.' World Peace wasn't alone in his apparent displeasure." [LA Times]

Merch: Managing editor Tom Scocca and contributing editor Drew Magary have both written books. You can buy Scocca's Beijing Welcomes You: Unveiling the Capital City of the Future here, and Magary's The Postmortal here. Now do it.


Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to

Share This Story