The Tiger Woods Guide To Post-Scandal Press Conferences

No one knows what Tiger Woods will say or do tomorrow, but no matter what happens it will go down in the annals of classic public apologies. Here's a look at some of the legends of the genre.
A quick study of the historic record also provides several different strategies for approaching this important Hail Mary of public relations. Which option will Tiger choose?
President Bill Clinton Strategy: Defiant lies
Basketball Guy Kobe Bryant Strategy: Hold on to your wife. Hard.
New York Governor Eliot Spitzer Strategy: Martyr yourself
South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford Strategy: Just completely wing it for 18 minutes
Televangelist Jimmy Swaggart Strategy: Cry, beg to your god
Idaho Senator Larry Craig Strategy: Definitely Not Gay
New Jersey Governor Jim McGreevey Strategy: Gay, but still married to an awesome gal
Louisiana Senator David Vitter Strategy: Confuse audience with references to obscure, unrelated legislation, then hide behind your wife.
Baseball Dude Alex Rodriguez Strategy: Just stop talking for 20 seconds or so
Pennsylvania Treasurer Bud Dwyer Strategy: Uh ... no. (WARNING: not safe for anyone who doesn't want to watch a guy shoot himself in the head.)


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