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We tend to find European sports terminology hilarious, mainly because it points to how equally absurd American sports terminology is. We all might know what "a blooper to shallow left" means, but to anyone not intimately familiar with baseball terminology, that s just nonsensical babbling. So here s a look at the big news of the week in odd, confusing sports in other lands, with our translation.

• "Muttiah Muralitharan, Sri Lanka's master spinner, has dismissed rumours regarding his alleged connection with a Mumbai bar dancer and, through her, with the betting syndicates." []

Ha, strippers and the mob. And you were saying what about cricket being boring?

• "For the record, Tigers' coach Pat Howard instructed Lewis Moody to drive over to Leeds (a three-hour round trip) and apologise in person to the bloke he punched during an Guinness 'A' League game last Monday." [Planet Rugby]

The sports agents were driven out of England along about the 14th century, apparently.


• "When the skies are clear, AFL football is a game more suited to the day. At night, when the dew descends, as it did at Subiaco on week one of the finals, or there is a combination of natural and artificial moisture, it can degenerate rapidly. [The Herald Sun]

Now on the Weather Channel, the Aussie Rules Football standings.