Tommy Craggs Is A Grumpy Bastard And A Genius

Here are three short stories about Tommy Craggs.

1. At some point in time, I had badgered Tommy Craggs with enough Gchats and emails that he started responding to most questions with a "fuck you." Tommy's "fuck you" had to be translated, but most of the time, it meant "yes." (There was also the occasional "eat me" or "fuck yourself.") I'm not going to put excerpts from a transcript, because most of them aren't available, but I swear there was one stretch of time when Tommy sent me at least one "fuck you" a day for approximately 50 consecutive days. He was an easily flustered, plaid-wearing DiMaggio, picking his spots and keeping the streak alive.

2. Tommy was open to practically everything, but he was sometimes reluctant to my innovative headlines.

Craggs: why not make the headline good?

me: This Frank Caliendo Impression Video Will Make You Shit Your Dick

Craggs: don't do that

Months later, however, he finally warmed up to the idea.

3. For the 2013-14 NFL season, I was the main writer on Sundays, but I'd also have help from one of the full-time writers in a rotation. Eventually, Tommy wasn't quick enough to beg out, and had to take a Sunday. He wrote two posts: One on Lou Reed's death and one on Dez Bryant getting worked up on the sidelines. Each two-paragraph post took about two fucking hours. They were also better than anything I wrote that month, or year.