Well, This Is Awkward: Maybe That Isn't Tiger Woods In Those Sex-Rehab Photos

Illustration for article titled Well, This Is Awkward: Maybe That Isn't Tiger Woods In Those Sex-Rehab Photos

My trust in the National Enquirer is unbounded, but X17 claims that these photographs, of a man who is not Tiger Woods sexlessly strolling the gentle paths of Pine Grove, show the same guy in the Enquirer's grainy photos.


The Enquirer, however, insists it's a "laughable" cover-up, a "bizarre and ridiculous ruse ... to make it look like The ENQUIRER's exclusive photo of Tiger in rehab is not him."

Tiger's stand-in was paraded in front of a swarm of photographers and he was wearing EXACTLY the same clothing as the real Tiger when we photographed him days ago.

We're pretty sure the clinic makes them change their clothes.

Would-be Tiger clearly has a different build, is taller, lighter skinned and has a rounder face.

The Tiger imposter wears his socks much higher than Real Tiger, who wears only ankle socks, not only in The Enquirer photo but on a regular basis.

Magnification of the photos also shows the two men have distinctly different noses, to the point where any comparison is a joke.

Fake Tiger also has much longer arms, is stockier than Real Tiger who, while muscular, is far more lean.

Fake Tiger is clean shaven, which could simply be explained by saying Tiger shaved. What can't be explained however, is that Tiger seems to have faded in just a matter of days. Fake Tiger's skin is much lighter than Real Tiger.

Fake Tiger's legs are also much hairier than Real Tiger.

Fake Tiger is even outfitted with Stanford baseball cap (Real Tiger went to Stanford).

I have no idea what to make of the photos, but I do think we've crossed some strange threshold with this story when the National Enquirer suddenly turns into the back cover of Highlights.

Tiger's Got A Twin At Rehab! [X17]

* * * * *

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Tomorrow, we're trying out a new writer, a Bonobo generously donated by a reader. Barry's here on Sunday. Benoit Denizet-Lewis's Northwestern hoops column returns on Monday.