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What Time Does 'What Time Does The Super Bowl Start?' Start?

Illustration: Jim Cooke (GMG)

The time has come once again for the “big game,” the football-related contest that surrounds every first Sunday of February, the race to the top for the big trophy. That trophy is, of course, dominance over other grimy web publications who engage in the now-annual, semi-hallowed practice of debasing themselves at the feet of the SEO gods in hopes of a firehose’s worth of curious Super Bowl viewers trying to find out what time the dang game starts.

The Huffington Post started this shit in 2011, and every year we’ve paid attention, things have only gotten more embarrassing. This blog post you are reading now will unfortunately not tell you what time the game starts—you’re an adult, you can figure this out on your own—but it will chronicle, as ever, the answer to the real question: What time does “What time does the Super Bowl start?” start?

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(A note on some participants, especially CBS Sports: It seems that several articles are simply being republished everyday with a new timestamp, or have at least been updated and pushed out again. Somehow the same three CBS Sports blogs are showing up as distinct stories in a Google search more than 20 times. Tracking this is beyond my skill, but don’t worry, they still did their thing as usual. If it makes you feel any better, our oldest friend distinguished itself.)

Here are 2019's participants:

This is a breaking news post, and we will update it as more information becomes available.

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