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Illustration for article titled *WINNER*: Then I Get The More Awesome Idea Of Giving Him A Blow Job In His Girlfriends Bathroom.

For many of you, the day after Thanksgiving requires you to put on your best Gap sport coat, head out to the local beef-and-beer drink your way through a high school reunion. Sometimes, the outcomes are disastrous. Heed these warnings.


My first Thanksgiving reunion with high school friends weren't with friends of my own, but with my cousin's. She was two years older than me and was always my childhood hero. Especially when I was in school, since she and her friends would sneak me beer and get me high.

So Thanksgiving 2000 cousin and I are both back home and meet up with her friends at Crow Bar in North Beach, SF (RIP Crow Bar). After hours rocking their juke box with The Big Four (of metal), playing air hockey and shenanigans involving someone's glass eye, one of our group pukes on the floor. His name was Nick and I'd had a crush on him since I was 13. Of course he was thrown out and we, including Nick's gf, go to the gf's house around the corner.

Everyone continues to party at this girl's apartment, while Nick voms in the bathroom. I get an awesome idea to venture into the bathroom, to, like, see what's up, I guess? As I recall, he's doubled over the toilet, dry heaving or trying to pull the trigger.

Then I get the more awesome idea of giving him a blowjob. In his girlfriend's bathroom.
I'm not sure what was going through my mind (10 years ago!), but I was certainly hyper aware of puke breath. So, obviously, blowjob was the way to go.


As I'm know, his girlfriend's knocking on the door trying to make sure he's okay, asking why the door's locked, etc. After he/we is/are done, I unlock the door and start rinsing with mouthwash. His girlfriend walks in and I'm like "I needed Scope" while Nick is sitting on the toilet trying to look relaxed, which I imagine he was.

Of course, by Christmas everyone knew about Gina's slutty cousin who goes to school in Santa Barbara and I was banned from that group until Nick ended the relationship. Not really sure if this is a horror story, but I was recently reminded of it because Nick is turning 30 this year and he's having his party Thanksgiving Saturday. He couldn't be less attractive to me if he tried. — Aileen F.

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