albertburneko Page 19 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Time For The Celtics To Get Isaiah Thomas Some Damn Help
One of the big subjects of talk around the NBA these past few weeks has been LeBron James’s workload. And with good reason, too: LeBron’s 32 years old now, with a hell of a lot of basketball miles behind him, and as the past two seasons have shown us, the Cavaliers’ title chances correspond pretty d...
Trump Called A Press Conference Because The Tweets Weren't Working
Here is a ... well, here is something:...
A President You Can Drink Bleach With
This seems a good moment to revisit “He seems like he’d be a good guy to have a beer with,” the shorthand explanation for the rank anti-intellectualism that put George W. Bush in the White House 17 years ago and later flowered, in our somehow even dumber present, into “Uh actually stupid idiots are ...
Peter King Profiles Tom Brady, Who Drinks Salt And Smiles And Therefore Is A Genius
Of all the clichés of the hack celebrity profile, perhaps the most overdone is the one where the writer opens with an observation of the famous person’s eating or drinking behavior from across a table. You’ve encountered this countless times, I’m sure: the bombshell sex-symbol tearing lustily into a...
Dead Letters: "Move Your Ass To Samolia"<em></em>
Subject: Why are you’re coworkers such flaming libtards?...
Donald Trump Stunned To Learn Presidency Is An Actual Job, His First
Maybe you’d better sit down for this one. According to a report by Politico, corned-beef dirigible Donald Trump, a skill-free inheritance baby with a virtually unbroken lifelong track record of incompetence and failure, has found that running the United States government is a tougher job than lendin...
The Wizards Are For Real
Take heart, D.C. fans. Sometimes the best basketball player alive is just gonna throw in a one-legged 25-foot turnaround fallaway jumper high off the glass to tie the game with 0.3 seconds left in regulation in your building. It happens! Or anyway, it happened....
Apropos Of Nothing, Here's Chris Sale In A Red Sox Outfit
Courtesy of the Boston Globe’s Pete Abraham, on Twitter:...
A Timeline Of Proposed Super Bowl 51 Headlines From Last Night
The Deadspin staff convened in our staff chatroom last night to discuss and coordinate our coverage of Super Bowl 51 while we all watched it from our various homes and/or Super Bowl parties. As the game unfolded, staffers suggested various headlines for our postgame story; I’ve compiled them into a ...
We're The Staff Of Deadspin. Let's Chat.
It’s Friday. Nobody’s working. We’re hanging out in the discussion section below, waiting to answer your questions. Come join us!...
Inspiring: Man Who Single-Handedly Brought Down Roger Goodell Now Runs Successful Start-Up<em></em>
A lot has changed for Bill Simmons since he sat for an interview with Recode’s Peter Kafka back at the South by Southwest festival in March of 2015. He got fired from his longtime job at ESPN; he launched an HBO television series; he founded The Ringer on content platform Medium; HBO canceled his te...
Hmm, I Guess Maybe The Wizards Are Good Or Whatever
The Washington Wizards struggled through most of the first half of last night’s home game against the extremely shitty New York Knicks. If you’ve followed the Wizards at all in ... well, ever, then it was the type of game you’re used to seeing them piss away (or, sometimes even more maddeningly, to ...
LeBron Will Find His Extra Playmaker In The Toilet
The Cleveland Cavaliers lost again last night, to the shit-ass Dallas Mavericks, dropping to 7-8 in January. LeBron’s fed up! With Charles Barkley, for one thing, but also and more importantly, with not having any reliable playmakers on the bench who can take some pressure off of him and Kyrie Irvin...
Resist.
Yes, wear a shirt with a slogan on it. Yes, put a bumper sticker on your car. Yes, flood your social media feed with your outrage. Fine. All of those are fine, and necessary, and good....
Oh God The Knicks Are Going To Screw This Melo Shit Up So Completely, I Can't Wait
The Los Angeles Clippers are wounded—literally!—and in trouble. Chris Paul’s out for at least five more weeks with an injured thumb; Blake Griffin only just returned from a knee injury that kept him out of 18 games. They’ve lost three of four, and to some real dogs: the Wolves, Nuggets, and 76ers. T...
Some Apocalyptic Death Scenarios, Ranked
Clearly the End is nigh. With that in mind, and while tooling around with the NUKEMAP, the Deadspin staff discussed various apocalyptic death scenarios today, to determine which ones seem good. Here is a ranked list of some—not all!—apocalyptic death scenarios, in order from best to worst....
Trump's Greatest Allies Are Craven Shithead <i>Serious Journalists</i> Like This Guy
First, a quick recap....
Craven <i>WaPo </i>Reporters Praise Trump's Press Secretary For Lying With More Composure This Time
Get a load of these sorry quisling motherfuckers....
Report: ESPN Is Canceling <i>The Sports Reporters</i>
The Sports Reporters, a Sunday morning talk show in which boomer columnists who stopped actually watching sports when Michael Jordan retired for the second time take turns benevolently donating their dignifying Pensive Faces to the vulgar ball-games, will be canceled, according to a report by Sports...