dashiell-bennett-old Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Realistic Memphis Fan Resigned To His Fate
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Landon Donovan's Goal May Have Also Saved His Marriage
Everyone was fighting back tears when Landon Donovan blew a kiss to "Bianca" following the biggest moment of his life. Well, that moment may have brought him and Bianca—his estranged wife—back together. Grab your hankies again....

Draft Night Does Not Ease Knicks Fans' Pain
Everyone agreed that the Knickerbockers need a big man and/or a point guard to complement the arrival of youknowwho. Naturally they used the NBA Draft to grab two mid-size scorers that were on no one's radar. Savvy, as usual....

Stephen Strasburg Saves The Collectible Crap Industry
Stephen Strasburg already has an autographed Washington Nationals baseball card somehow, although I'm going to guess the $1 jillion eBay offer is not a "serious" bid. It's easily worth twice that! [eBay]...

Indians Minor Leaguers Arrested For Beating Up Bouncer
Three players, including the son of Astros manager Brad Mills, are accused of puncturing a man's lung in a fight outside an Akron bar called....wait for it....Whiskey Dick's. Gee, you wouldn't expect trouble at a place like that....

Everyone Has A Theory About Penalty Kicks
We've almost reached the knockout stage, which means we've almost reached our first World Cup match decided by a shootout. And every bozo from your local pub to M.I.T. wants to tell you their unbeatable "secret" to penalty kicks. Hooray....

NBA Draft: Where People With More Talent Than You Become Millionaires
Wall, Turner, Favors, Johnson, and Cousins are the first five. No surprises there, because I am incapable of forming an opinion about the NBA. Nothing can shock me! [Live updates @ ESPN; Photo: AP]...

Australia Says Farewell To The World Cup
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Wimbledon Live Blog Devolves Into Poetry And Madness
Xan Brooks is an editor for The Guardian who was tasked with what would appear to be a pleasant two-week assignment: Live blogging Wimbledon. Then Isner-Mahut happened. Come join him on his descent into hell....

Golden Tate's Donut Crimes Becomes Obvious Ad Opportunity
As (sorta) predicted, Top Pot Doughnuts has turned a NFL's player's sugar addiction—and a fortuitous breaking and entering—into marketing gold. [Photo submitted by Seattle reader Jon.]...

Oh, Did We Forget To Mention Lawrence Taylor Was Indicted For Rape Today?
Hey, it was crazy out there today. Sometimes the grand jury hearings of a Hall of Famer accused of raping an underage prostitute just slip through the cracks....

Pirates Display Commitment To Excellence By Re-Hiring Pierogi
After a thorough HR review, the pierogi mascot who was fired for criticizing the team on Facebook has been reinstated to his menial, dehumanizing job. Because if there's one thing the Pirates never let go of, it's talent. [Post-Gazette; Photo]...

How Should We Resolve The Isner-Mahut Stalemate?
If there's one thing we learned today, it's this: John Isner and Nicolas Mahut have exactly the same amount of tennis skill. But that still doesn't solve the problem of how to end their ridiculous grudge match....

Riot Cops Slightly Underdressed For Soccer Match
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Flipping The Bird In Photos: Making You Super Awesome For 124 Years Running
Rick Chandler believes he's discovered the first ballplayer—perhaps the first person—to ever give the finger to the camera during a group photo. Meet Charles "Old Hoss" Radbourn, the first guy to ever be That Guy. [OutOfBounds]...

Mickey Mouse Assaulted For Supporting The Boston Red Sox
The All-Star Game is in Anaheim next month, so in the tradition of shameless corporate sponsorship, MLB created 30 Mickey Mouse statues, each one honoring a different pro team. Naturally, the Red Sox Mickey has been brutally violated....

"BroncoGator" T-Shirt Proves Florida Fans Can't Quit Tim Tebow
A devout Tim Tebow fan manages to accurately illustrate his obsession while simultaneously violating not one, but two registered trademarks. Honestly didn't see that cease and desist coming? Did NFL Legal change its delivery? [BroncoGator/ESPN]...

Let's Take A Moment To Enjoy France's Misery
South Africa is the first host nation that failed to make it out of the World Cup's group stage—but even they managed to humiliate the French and send them home amid one last bit of poor sportsmanship. Delicious....

PING! It's College World Series Time!
Actually, it has been for several days already, but by request, here's a CWS open thread. No. 1 Arizona State got bounced today and Oklahoma plays Clemson in the nightcap. No offense, but I'm watching "The Two Escobars." [AP Photo]...

Steelers Fans Need To Learn That No Parking Means No Parking
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....