dashiell-bennett-old Page 4 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
North Korean Soccer Fans Are Actually Chinese "Volunteers" (UPDATE)
North Korea's World Cup debut elicited touching stories about the ragtag group of soccer fans "hand-picked" by the Communist regime to support their squad in South Africa. Turns out they were hand-picked for their skill at not being Korean....
Tom Izzo: Spartan "For Life"
That sounds about right. Now ... exhale. [Lansing State Journal]...
Japan Wins Eighth Consecutive World Cup Costume Contest
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
In Defense Of The Vuvuzela
The backlash to the backlash has begun and I have to say that I'm glad. If you think the vuvuzela is an evil torture device that should be banned from all sport, then you can blow it out your ass....
Conference-ocalypse Averted, Big 12 Is The New Big 10
So today was apparently not a good day for the Big 12 to die. Despite all reports to the contrary, Texas will apparently stay in the Big 12 South and the Pac-10 is now stuck with Colorado....
Trust A.C. Green For All Your Pepper Spray Needs
When you need a non-lethal defense system, don't settle for anything less than the non-lethal defense system that A.C. Green gives to the women in his life. For lethal defense, you should still talk to Delonte West. [YouTube]...
FedEx: When You Absolutely, Positively Need Your Son's Team To Play In A BCS Conference
Memphis, stricken by Realignment Fever, is trying to negotiate their way into a bigger conference or, failing that, find a wealthy benefactor to buy them one. Thankfully, they (and their quarterback) have an international conglomerate at their disposal....
Deadspin Classic: The Tiny Plastic Horn That Will Ruin The World Cup
That terrible sound you'll be hearing over the next few weeks is the vuvuzela, which Dash described last year as "South Africa's answer to the Thunderstick." His story is below....
Blogger Retires To Spend More Time With His Television
As you may have gathered from my Griffey-esque nocturnal performance the last few weeks, my time at Deadspin is nearing an end. I'll be leaving this here neck of the internet woods at the end of this month....
Wait 'Til Next Year (When It Grows Out)
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Soccer: The Liberal Plot To Destroy America
Does America have World Cup fever? Or does the liberal media just want America to contract this deadly plague, because—like socialized medicine and soft cheeses—it's a silent killer that weakens our nation from within?...
Military's "Super Underwear" Will Save Your Butt
Scientists have developed some sort of electronic underoos that will be able to identify and heal injuries while you're wearing them. The genius behind this breakthrough? You guessed it: Nano-engineering professor Joseph Wang. [Reuters]...
Celtics Drooling With Pride After Big Win
The NBA Finals are tied at two and now we know how Big Baby got his name. Yes, everyone saw that. Also: Ew....
Here's A List Of Things That May Or May Not Happen Tomorrow
Sources tells us that all of the following things are true, unless they turn out not to be:...
Adam Burish Takes High Road, Offers To Punch Chris Pronger One More Time
Chicago may have ended their ridiculous Stanley Cup drought on Philly's home ice, but apparently that's no reason to be magnanimous. Celebration or no celebration, there's always time to remind people that Chris Pronger is a bit of a jerk....
In Case You're Confused, Big Ben Is The One Who DIDN'T Kill Two People
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Report: USC Football Gets 2-Year Bowl Ban
It only took six years, but USC is finally getting called to the NCAA principal's office. Postseason ban, loss of scholarships, games and possibly that 2004 national title. You know, now sounds like an excellent time to join the Pac-10....
Golden Tate's Dramatic 911 Donut Call: "They're Drunk And Being Retarded"
Listen in as an exasperated donut maker asks police to save her from two buffoons who stole her donuts and her keys. Also: an NFL wideout with "average" build who is "maybe 5'9"? Maybe he needs more than donuts....
Chicago Blackhawks Win The Stanley Cup
It's over. Patrick Kane wins it for the Blackhawks with a "secret" goal in OT. Good for him. (Update: Now with bonus video of Jeremy Roenick's tears.) [NHL.com]...
Did ESPN Photoshop Dwight Gooden's Mug Shot On To A Suit?
Doc Gooden called into the Scott Van Pelt radio show today, but since it is also simulcast on ESPN2, they needed a suitable head shot to show viewers. Or failing that, a police mugshot with a suit painted over it....