tuffy-old Page 6 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight: To Begin With, Everything
What to watch while wondering if Pittsburgh beats Cleveland in everything ... • Movie: Almost Famous (7 pm ET) [HBO Plus] - Of course we're home to liveblog Game 3. We're always home. We're uncool. • Baseball: World Series Game 3: Rays at Phillies (8 pm ET) [FOX] - Waldorf vs. Gonzo. We're taking s...

Hugh 4: Louisiana Signals Its Displeasure Over Current Events
Thanks to Paul for this evocative image, complete with artsy angle. (And also thanks to Brad, who sent one just before post time.) We thought the LSU fans were a little drama queen-y when their band broke out "Paint It Black" at 21-7 Georgia. Now we know for sure. Lady Andrea: The #1-ranked team is ...


Hugh 3: Brian Who?
Texy let us know that Brian Griese had an awful time remembering Chris Weinke's name in the Texas-Team That Will Lose to Texas game. We don't think Chris should be offended. He had a fine sports career and should be proud of his efforts. Besides, who's gonna remember Brian Griese in three years? We ...

Hugh 2: The Wrath of Hugh
You're getting a little nastier out there, especially when it comes to having your sexual predilections called out in previous Hughs. (Confidential to Towering for Tebow: We're agnostic on pooper action; thanks for asking.) We approve of this turn for the mean. We also wonder if the left tackle for ...



Hugh 1: Chris Simms Should Take Notes on Internal Organ Care
No surprises out there so far. Texas Tech has taken the pressure off their kicking game by sticking to touchdowns, rolling out 35-14 before the half and injuring only one side judge. We thought Tech might have to roll out a teenager with a genetic liver disorder to kick after the half, but calm has ...

For Your Viewing Pleasure: A Cross-Country Demolition Blog Post Without Rules
• 12:00 — Sport: College Football - Texas Tech vs. Kansas [ESPN] - Not pictured: Texas, Oklahoma State and Oklahoma lining up to help expand the rear entry opened wide by Kansas. • 12:00 — Sport: College Football - Illinois vs. Wisconsin [ESPN2] - The Beloit, WI/South Beloit, IL Border War heats up....

What'll They Do to Joe Paterno: Embalm Him?
We'll bite: we don't know how Joe Paterno did it. We're baffled. Everyone (including us) had him written off for dead at Penn State and officials in Happy Valley looked for graceful ways to remove the body from the scene of the crime and somehow a student must have done something and now the program...


Isiah Thomas Is Not a Young Black Female: Police
Good morning, campers! Rise and shine! We hope you slept well last night, 'cause if you didn't... Jesus, we hope you don't live in the New York City media market and once had a modicum of fame in the City That Occasionally Requires Additional Assistance to Sleep at Night. If so, you probably noticed...

If you care enough to send the very best about the very worst in college football, hit us up on "The Hugh Johnson" on AIM. For general abuse, you can hit up Rick and me at [email protected]. We got nuttin' but love for you, baby....

Carlos Zambrano Mows Your Hitters Down
A game that was merely a whisper this morning has turned into a primal scream from the massive Cubs ace, Carlos Zambrano. Awash in a sea of Cubs blue at Miller Park in Milwaukee, Zambrano roared back tonight from a forced vacation due to rotator cuff soreness and an August well under his best to sec...

Creative Ways to Cheat Your Way to Success Back at the Office
Over the weekend, we've been presented with numerous ways to succeed by circumventing unfair and inappropriate "rules" meant to hurt you and not others by not giving you everything you want immediately. As we close out this weekend, let us give you the tools used by sports teams across the globe so ...

As Greg Biffle was approached by the ESPN sideline reporter on ABC in Victory Lane after his win at the Sylvania 300 about fifteen minutes ago, we can see on the overhead crane camera the reporter's producer is waving her binder at Biffle. On the binder is a piece of paper with bold letters: "PLEASE...

Jessica Simpson Entertains Phoenix Baseball Fans, Car Wreck Aficionados
We may have had a bit of fun in our last visit with the notion that Jessica Simpson's opening act is Randy Johnson. However, we felt that perhaps we hadn't given the matter the proper respect it deserves. After all, a number of important and wealthy people knowledgeable about their industries determ...

NFL Update: Week 2 Early Games Final
• Bears 17, Panthers 20- sigh. Jonathan Stewart scored his second TD with under four minutes left to secure the win. Oh, and a stalled Bears drive failed to bring them back. • Bills 20, Jaguars 16 - Trent Edwards (20-25, 239 yds.) charged back with 10 points in the fourth to steal the win. • Giants ...

NFL Update: Week 2 Third Quarter
• Bears 17, Panthers 13- Carolina rudely won't give up to the Neckbeard's superiority (17-23, 140 yards). Also: holding, Chicago. • Bills 10, Jaguars 16 - Maurice Jones-Drew scores a TD on a 74-yard drive for the Jaguars. • Giants 20, Rams 6 - Eli Manning: 17-26, 202 yds, 2 TDs, 86 commercials. Welc...

NFL Update: Week 2 Halftime
• Bears 10, Panthers 3- Both teams traded field goals in the second quarter. Matt Forte has 15 carries for 43 yards. • Bills 10, Jaguars 3 - Fred Jackson has four catches for 50 yards. • Giants 13, Rams 6 - Both teams traded field goals and then traded field goals again, including one at the half. E...