Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

Beware English Soccer And Its Unclean Women

Napoli owner Aurelio De Laurentiis has a message for any of his players who are thinking about defecting to the Premiership:

"The English live badly, eat badly and their women do not wash their genitalia. To them, a bidet is a mystery.” Well, perhaps if they need some vinegar and water, they could just squeeze it out of him. [Dirty Tackle]

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Suck it, Luke Walton: UCLA's seventeenth man maybe didn't earn his roster spot the same way everyone else did. (He's John Wooden's great-grandson.) [Rush The Court]

A two-sport athlete: Falcons fullback Ovie Mughelli can kick your ass at Halo. That's great, but shouldn't he also be able to kick my ass in football? [Yardbarker]

Breaking wind: Titans fans are still coming to terms with Jeff Fisher's meteorological skills. [Titans Tracker]

Where's Sgt. Slaughter when you need him?: Ahh yes, the rarely attempted throat slash-pants dropping combo goal celebration, with accompaniment by a deranged Italian announcer. It's an oldie, but a goodie. [Rumors and Rants]

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