Football Page 1550 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Larry Johnson Makes a Solemn Vow to Not Become Ike Turner
Chiefs running back Larry Johnson was deactivated again this week and addressed his latest lady-pestering incident with the media yesterday and seemed surprisingly contrite. We're so used to seeing troubled athletes mumble through scripted apologies for the sake of their career, it's a little jarrin...
'100 Percent Cheese Free' Apparently Not 100 Percent Nut Free
Meet Syd Davy, better known to Minnesota Vikings fans at 100 Percent Cheese Free (it's Rip The Packers Day, I guess). He was the subject of our About Last Night Wakeup Image this morning, and as promised here's an explanation as to what he was doing at the Patriots-Broncos Monday Night game. Don Cha...
Colt McCoy's Girlfriend Exhibits Excellence In TV Journalism
Here is Mandy Pepperidge Rachel Glandorf, who is supposedly Colt McCoy's girlfriend and, I'm sure, a top-notch journalist for CBS affiliate KEYE42-TV in Austin, Texas. Here's hoping the powers that be at TBS/ESPN/Versus/Fox Sports Southwest/Playboy Channel are reading this, because fast tracking thi...
Browns Suspend Kellen Winslow For Defending His Testicles
Can a team suspend a player for defending his own nether region? It appears that's exactly what the Cleveland Browns are doing with Kellen Winslow, and excuse me if I call them on their bullshit. On Monday Cleveland suspended Winslow for one game for "unwarranted, inappropriate, and unnecessarily di...
It's Obama And McCain ... AFTER DARK!
So over the weekend, the two candidates for President — Sen. Barack Obama, head of a Muslim sleeper cell, and Sen. John McCain, organizer of the first Hanoi chapter of the Ku Klux Klan — spoke at the Al Smith Dinner, a big Catholic charity event held in Manhattan right before the elections every y...
So What's The Deal With That Tacklin' SEC Ref?
The most frequently submitted tip over the last 48 hours or so is the YouTube clip of that lunatic umpire who lowered the boom on South Carolina quarterback Stephen Garcia as he tried to run for a touchdown against LSU. For a good while, I didn't even believe it was real. It had to be one of those f...
Switching Mikes In Midstream, The 49er Way
Well, here is your new face of the San Francisco 49ers. Initial thoughts? Aside from being totally hyp-no-tized, I have to say that it really couldn't be any worse than the old one. There was perhaps no coach in the NFL one wanted to see succeed more than Mike Nolan — really, has anyone ever had a b...
The Rather Remarkable Self Destruction Of Larry Johnson
Details continue to come out concerning Chiefs running back Larry Johnson and an altercation with a woman at a Kansas City nightclub on Oct. 10, and it's interesting, if depressing, reading. Already scheduled to appear in court on Dec. 3 on an assault charge for pushing a woman at a nightclub, Johns...
Um, What The Hell, Patriots Fans?
Sorry to start your day off on the wrong foot, but several people have sent this in; a fan at the Monday Night game in Foxboro last night purportedly wearing blackface. I guess that's what this is — a closer shot is shown following the jump — although I'm no expert on such matters. Would Ted Danson ...
Jay Cutler Out to Prove his Arm is Bigger Than His Mouth
Tonight, the Denver Broncos and mouthy quarterback Jay Cutler swagger into Foxboro and will attempt to frustrate the completely neutralized New England Patriots on their home field. Even though the Pats do not remotely resemble anything close to the juggernaut they were last year, they're still favo...
Boston College Linebacker Is Indeed Breakable
Boston College linebacker Brian Toal is a tough guy. He's had a rough college career filled with injuries, but the redshirt senior will not be beaten. Some—like the Boston Globe—might even say he's unbreakable, as they helpfully remind us on today's front page. Right next to the story about his brok...
The $400,000 New York Jets Tickets
Hey, Jets fans! Are you excited about the new Meadowlands stadium opening in 2010? Are you also an obscenely rich business tycoon in a recession-proof industry and lacking all economic conscience? Then you are in luck—or you were—when it comes to securing a seat in the new stadium. Unlike the Giants...
College Football Roundup: Mommas Don't Bring Your Babies to Neyland
Just a tip, don’t ever try and take a baby into Neyland Stadium. No matter how old the kid (ours is less than nine months old and was sleeping in a baby bjorn on his mom’s chest). Babies have to have tickets to Neyland too. I have no idea why the University of Tennessee would have this policy. Espe...
Favre-Packers Divorce Is Getting Downright Messy
So do you have a problem that you would like Brett Favre to solve? Girlfriend trouble? Confused about which laundry detergent to buy? Hang by your phone, and Brett will be with you momentarily. But first he has to solve the problems of the NFL, like advising Tony Romo on whether or not he should pla...
Lazy Sunday
The Packers will keep pace with the Bears in the NFC North. Green Bay has managed to all but shut down Reggie Wayne and Marvin Harrison today, although Dominic Rhodes filled in nicely for the injured Joseph Addai (pronounced "Add-ee-ay", if you're Jeremy Piven). Manning threw a late pick on the goa...
I Think She's Mocking The Way You're Lying On The Couch
You remember that "Favre who?" sign you drew up at the beginning of the year when Green Bay started 2-0, only to shove it back in your closet after they lost 3 in a row? Well, it might be time to take it back out and dust if off, because Aaron Rodgers is looking sharp today! The Colts offense spent ...
If Ed Hochuli and Tim Donaghy Had a Child ...
... It would no doubt be the ref working last night's LSU/USC game. This is easily one of the most amazing sports videos you'll ever see. Inexplicably, a ref felt that the LSU Tigers weren't playing tough enough defense against South Carolina last night, and he decided to do something about it. And...
Moving into the Late NFL Afternoon
All of the early games are final, and here are your scores: Bills (23) - Chargers (14) Panthers (30) - Saints (7) - There was fear that Reggie Bush's knee injury might be season-ending, but such talk was reportedly premature. Bears (48) - Vikings (41), Steelers (38) - Bengals (10) - Hey, Chad Johns...
Through Daylight and Through Darkness, the Cheerleading Shall Continue
• San Diego at Buffalo: As reader The Fan's Attic points out, the important thing to remember here, kids, is that despite the numerous power outages in the arena during this game, the suggestive dancing never stopped: "Bills cheerleaders continued their routines along the sidelines." USA! USA! USA!...
The NFL - Now With Rouges!
ESPN screw-up aside, there is a wild, wild game going on in the Windy City. The Bears lead the Vikings 27-24 in the third. Chicago's D has already scored two touchdowns, and Chester Taylor stole a TD from Adrian Peterson's fantasy owners just before the half. Blocked punts and field goals are every...