Golf Is Now A Contact Sport

Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in this morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.

•Graeme McDowell did just enough (i.e. hung around while everyone else went down in flames around him) to win the US Open at Pebble Beach. It gives the rest of us, who just aim for par, a hope that we too can win a major (with our 28 handicap). (Thanks to David for the screencap.)

•Manny Ramirez's return to Boston went exactly as he had hoped—assuming he forgot he was a Dodger these days, which is a pretty safe assumption. The Red Sox swept, moving into a tie for second, a game back of New York.

•Kim Clijsters is back at Wimbledon for the first time in four years, opening play with a straight sets win over some nobody. Her success since her return from starting a family leaves no excuses for those new mothers out there. Aww, you don't want to go to work today because the baby was up all night? Well, Kim Clijsters is kicking ass in a goddamn major.

•The cheese eating surrender monkeys shed at least half that label, resuming training in advance of tomorrow's match with South Africa. I'm sure this has to gall Ireland fans, but the upside of qualifying controversy has been the opportunity to watch the French implode on an international stage.

•Jimmie Johnson has won just about everything else, and now he can add a road course to his portfolio; though it didn't hurt that Marcos Ambrose's car stalled under a late caution flag. This now concludes our NASCAR coverage for the year.

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Good morning. As you can see, we're already up and running.