Locker Page 1128 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Video Of An Old Crimson Tide Fan Lip-Synching "Call Me Maybe" Is The Most Discomforting Thing Ever
From tipster William, with whom we will be forever angry with due to what he has exposed us to, comes the above video. The video depicts an elderly gentleman lip-synching to "Call Me Maybe," which is A Thing on YouTube these days, but this version goes beyond "Oh man this song is so stupid and ann...

Because This Stuff Never Gets Old, Here's Carmelo Anthony Scaring People By Pretending To Be A Wax Figure
Melo got his sculpture at Madame Tussauds in Times Square yesterday, and in between saying things like "my time is coming," he did that thing where he stands stock-still until unsuspecting ticket-buyers get close enough to spook. There were no reactions as magical as this one, but Anthony's timing...

Steven Soderbergh Whips It Out. <i>Magic Mike</i>, Reviewed.
As Steven Soderbergh gets closer to the retirement he swears will be happening next year, it's tempting for us who love his movies to wish he'd go out with one last major opus, some sort of legacy-defining masterpiece. So maybe that's why it's good that he clearly doesn't seem interested in doing an...

How "Seven Nation Army" Conquered The Sports World
The Euro 2012 semifinals kick off today, and 69 goals in, you might have noticed one fan chant being sung after every single one. How did an eminently chantable White Stripes ditty become soccer's universal goal celebration? This piece, originally published Jan. 13, 2012, has your answers....
![Tyler Clippard, Giant Jerk Animal Lover, Spits On Feeds Baby Ducks [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Tyler Clippard, Giant Jerk Animal Lover, Spits On Feeds Baby Ducks [UPDATE]
Reader Curtis took in the Nationals/Rockies game at Coors Field last night, another Rockies loss. As the game wound down he walked around the stadium only to come along a duck family that had wandered into the visitors' bullpen. Clippard purposefully walked between the ducklings and their parents,...

Deadspin Up All Night: Warming Up
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Erik tonight, plus the Fights....

Nets Raise Their Offer To Deron Williams To A Birthday Party, Two Human Children
Deron Wiliams's wish list reportedly consists of just two teams: the Dallas Mavericks and the Brooklyn Nets. For a little extra-contractual love, the Nets drove a big old truck up to Williams's Soho home today, in honor of his 28th birthday. They also left a pair of children, but considering William...

Free Agent Says Money Is Important
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: So Steve Nash isn't going to the Knicks, then....

NBA Fines Amar'e Stoudemire $50K For Calling Twitter Complainer A Fag
We told you on Saturday about the Twitter troll whom Amar'e Stoudemire called a "fag" in a direct message. Now those avid sports-blog readers at the league office have decided to fine Stoudemire $50,000, the AP reports:...

A Plush Bear Stuffed With Crap. <em>Ted</em>, Reviewed.
1. Of the myriad problems with Ted, Seth MacFarlane's flaming, masturbating fart of a comedy, the biggest one is that the teddy bear at its center is neither cute nor funny. The movie thinks he's both. For the movie's promising central joke to work—that a boy's teddy bear comes to life and then grow...

Dwight Howard Inadvertently Caused All Sorts Of Trouble In Portland
On a January night in Portland, Quincy Wynn pulled up to a crosswalk He was waiting for pedestrians to cross the street so he could make a right turn on red, but he thought one of them was moving too slowly. He yelled at Josiah Kuehl, a 15-year-old high school student walking home from a wrestling t...

How To Eat Dog Shit: A Condiments Guide
Before we get to the Funbag, two things. First of all, I'm on vacation next week. So we're gonna have another guest Funbag host to answer all your questions. To send a Funbag submission to our guest host, just email the tips line. The good thing about submitting questions to the guest host is that y...

Baron Davis Chucks Basketballs At Oblivious New Yorkers In New PSA
The NYC Department of Transportation released the first of a series of public service announcements, warning pedestrians, cyclists and drivers to fucking pay attention, there are eight million other people in this goddamn city and life is hard enough without some selfish asshole just bowling throu...

Clyde Drexler: Everybody On The Dream Team Felt Sorry For Magic, Everyone In The NBA Was Waiting For Him To Die
Sports Illustrated's Jack McCallum followed the Dream Team around during the 1992 Olympics, and he has a new book, Dream Team, which covers the team in great detail. McCallum writes about the NBA climate before Barcelona, the team's various selection controversies, their legendary practices, and the...

Deadspin Up All Night: Welcome To The Machine
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Please catch up on day one of things, if you'd like....

Metta World Peace Says The Lakers Are The NBA's Best Team And Don't Need To Make Any Changes
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: World Peace is unlikely to become a GM one day....

Throbbing Pipes And Pussy By The Can: Scenes From Laconia Bike Week
It is never truly silent during Laconia Bike Week. Even when you're far from the Finger Eleven or Nickelback songs playing at Weirs Beach (the heart of the event), or from the profanity dropping out of the mouths of bearded dudes with skin almost as leathery as the vests they're wearing, there is st...

Tony Parker Says His Eye Was 99 Percent Punctured By Flying Glass In The Drake/Chris Brown Nightclub Melee
Some snarky bloggers cracked jokes a few weeks ago about what happened to Tony Parker's cornea in the bottle-throwing smackdown between Chris Brown, Drake, and their entourages. Parker showed up to a press conference in sunglasses, said he was fine and that his eye would heal in a week....

John Hollinger Had The Best NBA Preseason Predictions, Jon Barry's Were Nearly The Worst
With the NBA season concluding last week with a Miami Heat championship, let's revisit how those pre-season pundit predictions turned out. We tracked the picks from 30 ESPN pundits across 11 categories (6 division winners, 2 conference champions, NBA Finals champion, MVP, and rookie of the year)....