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The Best Things We Heard In 2018
King Princess has exactly six real songs out and every single one of them is good as hell. “1950” is a perfect pop song that you better like or else you’re the cops, and it’s not even the best song on her debut EP. Friendship ended with Lorde; now King Princess is new best friend. - Patrick Redford...

Time To Check In On Jim McVay And His Ridiculous College Football Grift
Today the Washington Post published a story on Jim McVay, the guy whose only job is to run a lower-tier college bowl game, and the million dollars he makes for doing it. The report, which points out how the $1,045,000 McVay made in 2017 “ranks as extreme” even in the bloated business of college foot...

The Best Things We Read In 2018
Let’s get this out of the way up top: Yes, I agree, you wouldn’t think a cultural history of Oklahoma City would make for a compelling book. (I’ve had this conversation a lot this year.) But Sam Anderson’s Boom Town is the most engrossing piece of writing I’ve read all year. The book weaves together...

Draymond Green Is Kind Of Killing The Warriors
The Warriors got smashed well and good by the Lakers last night, earning their 12th loss of what has so far been an uninspiring (by their standards) season. The Warriors have never had more than seven losses by Christmas during the Steve Kerr era, and it was genuinely strange to see them, at full st...

<i>A Christmas Story</i> Subplots, Ranked
Christmas feels incomplete without at least four-to-six partial viewings of A Christmas Story, Bob Clark’s 1983 movie based on Jean Shepherd’s semi-autobiographical stories. By now, if you have a heart, you’ve seen each segment and running subplot dozens of times. But which are the best? And which a...

No One's Scared Of Ben Simmons
Kyrie Irving caught fire to help the Celtics pull away from the 76ers for a 121-114 overtime win in a statement battle between two of the let’s say three best teams in the East. But it was his counterpoint who celebrated Christmas Day with a career high, even if it was a total accident and still sor...

Could Trump Dodge A Shoe?
Today, we’re talking about fart ventriloquism, Street Fighter, Bernie the Avalanche mascot, and more....

What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?<em></em>
It’s here! It’s finally here! Every year it seems like the big day will never come, but it’s here. It’s the day to gather with your family and friends ‘round the hearth, warm beverages and sweet treats at the ready, and have a hearty chortle over the things America stuck inside itself and couldn’t r...

Deadspin Up All Night: You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch
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Deadspin Up All Night: The Same Party Every Weekend
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NBA Officials Ruined Two Great Posters With Two Soft Techs
Jaylen Brown and Lauri Markkanen each had an incredible posterizing dunk in their games on Friday night. Each player looked at their respective victims and gave a slight flex in victory over their athletic accomplishment. Shortly after, each player was assessed a technical foul for their “unsportsma...

LeBron James Has No Problem Calling NFL Owners Out On Their Bullshit
LeBron James didn’t mince words when talking about the difference between NBA and NFL owners on the latest episode of his HBO show The Shop. In a conversation with Todd Gurley, Maverick Carter and Ice Cube, he called out the “slave mentality” NFL owners have towards players while referencing roster ...

Deadspin Up All Night: I Just Want You For My Own
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Here Is A Heartwarming Video Of DeMarcus Cousins Dunking On Kevin Durant
Approximately 11 months after tearing his Achilles tendon, DeMarcus Cousins is slowly working his way into playing shape. He practiced a few times with the Warriors’ D-League team, although Steve Kerr told the San Francisco Chronicle’s Connor Letourneau yesterday that Boogie is “really not that clos...

Mark Cuban Shares Just The Most Exhausting Take On American Basketball
Luka Dončić is very good. He is also cool, the kind of player you look forward to rooting for and enjoying for years to come. It would be a shame if something were to happen that suddenly forced you to start rooting for Zion Williamson to make it his first order of business next season to dunk Donči...

ESPN Got NBA General Managers To Fill Their Diapers Over LeBron James Answering A Question
So I guess ESPN got what they wanted. Days after LeBron James said “duh” when asked if it would be cool to have one of the best players in the world on his team, rival general managers are reportedly losing bowel control over the terrifying implications of a player acknowledging aloud what is plainl...

Luka Dončić's Step-Back Jumper Is As Smooth As It Gets
The Mavericks lost to the Clippers last night in a rather entertaining edition of the DeAndre Jordan Bowl, one where nobody was particularly interested in playing defense and Lou Williams did the Lou Williams thing of making every goddamn shot he thought about. Leading the line for the Mavs was Slov...

Prosecutor Releases Scathing Report On Michigan State's "Culture Of Indifference"<em></em>
On Friday morning, Michigan special prosecutor William Forsyth released a withering report, which you can read here, about Michigan State’s handling of years of sexual assault complaints against Larry Nassar. In the report, Forsyth blames MSU’s “culture of indifference and institutional protection” ...

Zion Williamson Laughs And Hides His Face After Being Asked About Maybe Someday Joining The Knicks
The insanely overpowered Duke Blue Devils gave Texas Tech their first loss of the season Thursday night, at Madison Square Garden, in a refreshingly competitive 69–58 game. Among other things, this was humanoid megafauna Zion Williamson’s first career game at the home of the Knicks, and so of course...

Oh Wait, Never Mind, The Rockets Are Dead Again
The resurgent Rockets lost by two points in Miami Thursday night, but here’s what you need to know: they were up eight points in the second quarter when Chris Paul suffered another hamstring injury and had to leave the game. After the loss—which, to be fair, came on the second night of a back-to-ba...