Locker Page 315 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
What Weird New Behavior Will Donald Trump Display At The National Championship Game?<em></em>
A year and change into his first term in office, it’s still honestly kind of hard to tell why Donald Trump ran for president. At this point, we know enough about him to assume both 1) that it had nothing to do with any of the reasons he offered on the campaign trail and 2) that it’s probably somethi...
The National Park Service Will Be Run By The Guy Who Helped Dan Snyder Cut Down Public Trees To Improve His River View<em></em>
As fits a government that could already boast a head of the Department of Energy who wants to do away with the Department of Energy and a secretary of education who favors homeschooling over public schools, a guy renowned for desecrating park lands will now be running the National Park Service. P. D...
René Magritte As Philosophical Detective
This essay was originally published in the Threepenny Review (1994), is featured in Sante’s anthology, Kill All Your Darlings, and appears here with the author’s permission....
Cowardly President Diaper Donald Reportedly Won't Do ESPN Interview At National Championship Game. Sad!
If you have been paying literally any attention to the news over the last day or the last week or really the last many years, you are well aware that Donald Trump is profoundly stupid and/or mentally ill and/or suffering from (not even early-onset, but just regular-old-onset, he’s 71 years old) deme...
Order The Veggie Burger With Bacon
More often than is smart, I find myself at a bar and desperately in need of sustenance with dwindling options. Maybe you’re an idiot like me, or maybe you work nights at a bar or restaurant and need to eat something satisfying that won’t knock you on your ass mid-shift. And when you ask a server if ...
Jahlil Okafor’s Favorite Movie As A Kid Was <i>Air Bud</i>
One of the most intriguing subplots to the NBA season has been finding out about Jahlil Okafor’s taste in movies. Okay, maybe not the most intriguing, or even intriguing at all, but… just stay with me here....
Rick Carlisle Needs To Chill
Mavericks head coach Rick Carlisle, who is also the president of the NBA’s Coaches Association, is fed up with ESPN giving crazy sports dad LaVar Ball so much space to express himself. Everyone is tired of LaVar Ball because he’s annoying and stupid, but Carlisle’s reasons for being angry are not go...
Luke Walton Jokes He Took Out Lonzo Ball Because "His Dad Was Talking Shit"
The Lakers got to end their nine-game losing streak Sunday night by treating the Hawks like the punching bags they are, but the longer-term and more important story in Los Angeles is the Ball family’s undermining of head coach Luke Walton. First, during the losing streak, LaVar said from all the way...
Kawhi Leonard's Gonna Miss Some More Games
The injury that kept Kawhi Leonard out of last night’s Spurs-Blazers game is a “partial tear” in his left shoulder, according to coach Gregg Popovich....
Deadspin Up All Night: You're Always On The Run Now
Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Go see I, Tonya, kids....
Lonzo Ball Offers Least Enthusiastic Endorsement Of Luke Walton Possible
As expected and possibly intended, Lonzo Ball, stateside, is having to answer for his dad’s commentary on the fit of Luke Walton as head coach of the Los Angeles Lakers. Here we have the young man trying to navigate his way through this trial with as many clichés and platitudes as possible:...
Draymond Green Says The NBA Should Consider Replacing All Its Current Referees
Draymond Green picked up his 11th technical foul of the season during Saturday’s win over the Los Angeles Clippers, bringing him within five techs of an automatic one-game suspension. Afterward, he told Anthony Slater of The Athletic that the current state of NBA officiating is “ruining the game”:...
It Is Disgusting And Unfair That Giannis Is Making Clutch Jumpers Now
Giannis Antetokounmpo put up another absurd Greek Freak line Saturday night in a Bucks road victory over the Wizards: 34 points on 17 shots, 12 rebounds, seven assists, a couple steals, and a block. That’s the third time this season he’s put up at least 34 points on better than 70 percent shooting, ...
Lonzo Ball's Father Says No Lakers Player Wants To Play For Luke Walton
LaVar Ball, right now, is probably most associated with overheated popup retail openings and the bizarre basketball odyssey of his two younger sons. He’s a reality TV star and a famous Famous Person, and part of his job as a person who is famous for being famous is to say outlandish things in order ...
Matthew Dellavedova Ejected After Taking Down Bradley Beal
Tonight’s Bucks-Wizards game is a tight one, but Milwaukee is finishing it out without guard Matthew Dellavedova after the Australian earned a flagrant 2 ejection for demolishing Bradley Beal. He is fortunate the official punishment is all that he suffered....
(They Lost.)
It’s our favorite genre of local news screwups!...
Steph Curry Went Absolutely Bonkers On The Clippers
By now, Steph Curry highlights are sort of redundant. His very way of playing is a highlight reel: he uses darting dribble moves to create space to launch bombs from insane distances; he plays high-stakes, gambling defense; nearly every pass he throws is a slick no-look job. That’s how you turn a re...
Marcus Mariota Throws Touchdown Pass To Himself
The Tennessee Titans are somehow still in this wild card game against the Chiefs thanks to Marcus Mariota throwing a touchdown pass to himself, entirely legally. PLAYOFFS, BABY. We believe this is only the second time this has ever happened in NFL history; here’s the first, in 1997:...
Deadspin Up All Night: In Case You Missed It
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Hang in there....