Pity Poor Roger Clemens

• We remind you to keep the submissions coming for the ESPN Accountability Record. • How long is 23 months in dog years? • That bitchin' ESPN holiday party. • An outstanding Jamboroo that you might have missed in all the Mitchell Report business. • Oh, yes: That. • We hate "guarantees." • Rick Reilly is doing OK for himself. • The NBDL rules. • Isiah is tired of you making the Knicks lose. • All hail the return of Kyle Orton.

As you might suspect, we're still pretty exhausted from yesterday, so we're gonna hit the sack. J.E. Skeets is the man with the weekend plan, so he'll be injecting the ass of sports for the next couple of days. See you Monday.