Report: The Rockets Have Stuffed Carmelo Anthony Into The Closet Behind The Vacuum Cleaner

The Houston Rockets are unofficially done with their short-lived Carmelo Anthony experiment— everybody figured that much already. But according to Adrian Wojnarowski, it looks like Anthony’s next chapter might be a fate worse than free agency. Apparently, Melo’s going to stay on the Rockets’ roster, but he’s just going to hang out far away from the team and collect dust.

Honestly, this is a fitting step for Carmelo, who has essentially become the NBA’s version of a busted old air conditioning unit—he barely functions, he’s a pain in the ass to move, and he just takes up space for most of the year. In a few months Daryl Morey may need to ask his aunt with a house in the suburbs if he can store Carmelo Anthony in her garage for the summer.