art Page 303 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lamar Thomas Speaks (Kind Of)
We're having trouble locating it specifically on CanesTime, the message board for Miami football, but several other Scout.com boards have posted what is allegedly a message from recently fired Miami Hurricanes radio broadcaster Lamar Thomas, whose now infamous tirade about beating down FIU players h...
Also, We're Pretty Sure That's A Facemask Penalty
Welcome to Brawlgate, Day 4, as fallout continues from Saturday's melee between the Hurricanes and Golden Panthers. The Atlantic Coast and Sun Belt Conferences handed out 31 one-game suspensions late Sunday — 18 for Florida International, 13 for Miami — but, as they say, a new wind was about to blow...
Welcome To The NFL, Matty
Because everyone we talk to in St. Louis says it's been raining all day and is likely to rain all night, so we are less than optimistic that we'll see the NLCS Game 5 tonight. Therefore, we must receive our sporting fix tonight from Monday Night Football, or, as we like to call it, "Tony Kornheiser ...
Back To You In The Booth, Lamar
So it may not come as a surprise to anyone that more suspensions have come down following the steel cage match between the University of Miami and Florida International football teams on Saturday. A total of 31 players have been dinged — and must sit out their respective games this weekend — 18 from...
Your Friday Cross Dressing/She-Male Roundup
If you know us, you're familiar with our usual gripe: It's getting so that you can't stage a simple dragon-boat racing competition these days without someone breaking the rules by cross dressing. From Reuters:...
Kids And Darts! What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
And so finally, we have the concept for the next Johnny Knoxville movie. The British Darts Organisation is campaigning for their sport to be included in the 2012 London Olympics; and to that end, they've opened the Darts School of Excellence in London. It's for for kids ages 7 to 18, as England atte...
John L. Smith Knows What You're Thinking
And he's acting accordingly:...
Pucker, Pucker, Pucker
When I first downloaded this clip and started to listen to it, I saw that it was over 15 minutes long, and I thought, "Eh, it's probably not worth it." And for a couple of minutes, it wasn't. And then this guy Michigan State radio guy begins the slow rapid descent into madness....
"You Jackin' It?"
Well, here it is: Carl Monday being bum-rushed on "The Daily Show." The segment is as entertaining as we could have hoped — we love Jason Jones' Monday-esque intro — and, we hope, succeeds in finally crossing Carl over to an America that will never, ever be ready for him....
No Pedro In October? That Just Seems Wrong
As we deal with our own baseball-related panic — which we'll obviously be getting into later — we turn to Queens, where Mets fans, enjoying their best season in nearly 20 years, have lost their ace for the entire playoffs. Whether Pedro Martinez comes up with a tiny former Brando co-star or not, w...
![Hey, Did Somebody [Cramp] In Here?](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18f47w4gdsv3vjpg.jpg)
Hey, Did Somebody [Cramp] In Here?
Just to make sure we remain the gutter-obsessed sewer rats we are, it's time for some fart humor....
As Pink Taco Leaves, Leinart Arrives
As many of you know by know, the Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals, ignoring pleas from the unwashed masses, have sold the naming rights to their new stadium. And, as would be expected, it's the most idiotic name possible: The University Of Phoenix Stadium. The name is confusing — so they're i...
Ron Artest Gets His Illini On, Tru Warrior Warier Style
So here's something that took us back a bit: Sacramento Kings guard/forward/madman Ron Artest is apparently on tour right now to support his modestly titled album "My World" — TRU WARIER! — and he's clearly playing the most amped up, crazy venues....
Return To Irreverence!
We knew the Oakland Raiders were going to be a source of consistent amusement throughout this season, through ineptitude, disorganization or simple befuddlement, but we didn't quite expect it to happen so soon....
Now That's A Serious Looking Contract
We don't mean to imply that there's a possibly new New York Islanders general manager Garth Snow — shown here on a "scouting trip" — might not necessarily be ready for life in a board room, considering just last year he was the team's backup goalie....
Party Crash: Our Birthday Bash
As you might have noticed — mainly because we kind of haven't shut up about it, much to our own detriment — our beloved little site turned one year old yesterday. When we personally turned one year old in 1976, we celebrated by drinking in extreme excess, so we thought we'd do the same thing last ni...
Waiting Patiently For Art Modell To Die
I know this is perverse, but I can't quite decide just how perverse. Actually, I probably know, but choose not to acknowledge it, because I also find it amusing....
Cameron Family Just Pleased As Punch With Matt Leinart Right Now
So, it's no longer just small local papers reporting that Matt Leinart's sperm have been even busier than usual lately. It has now been confirmed, by none other than People magazine, and if you can't trust them, you can't trust anyone....
Matt Leinart Has Himself Some Swimmers
This is Matt Leinart. He is a rookie quarterback for The Buzzsaw That Is Arizona Cardinals, though he is perhaps better known for his career at the University of Southern California, where he won a Heisman trophy and 1.5 national championships....
Tiger Wins In An Un-Tigerly Fashion
The man wins even when he isn't trying to win. Tiger was shaky down the stretch (!), holding a three-stroke lead with six holes to play, and ending up in a playoff with Stewart Cink. Four holes later, Tiger Woods was the WGC-Bridgestone champion....