as Page 2435 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Just How Drunk Was Eddie Sutton?
Well, he blew a .22. To figure out how many drinks per hour that is, first, we have to take a guess at the man's weight. Now, I've been fired from my job trying to guess people's weight at the carnival three or four times, so I'm not very good at it. But if we guess an even 200 pounds, consuting ...

About Last Night...
• NBA: Sophomores 106, Rookies 96. I guess "Second Year Guys" wouldn't look quite as snazzy across the front of their uniforms. Andre Iguodala has 30 of the most meaningless points ever scored....

Welcome To The Golf Course, Baby ... You Gonna DIIIIIEEEE!
We hadn't seen any pictures of Axl Rose lately — we still imagine the former Guns 'N Roses frontman growing his fingernails long and collecting jars of his own urine, Aviator-style, while he watches Velvet Revolver videos and flicks a lamp on ... and off ... and on — but this more recent one struc...

Does This Make Him A Five-Tool Player?
Either huge fantasy sports Web site Rotoworld was hacked into around midnight last night ... or they're introducing a new category in fantasy baseball this year....

This Is Not A Picture Of Chastity Bono
Far be it from us to mock a guy for going back to rediscover his roots and promote the game of baseball internationally ... but sweet God, what has happened to former Reds reliever Danny Graves? When you get back from Vietnam, before you head to Indians training camp ... might we suggest a workou...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while staging the Battle of Midway in the bathtub ... • NBA: Antonio Davis rushes into stands to defend wife — the only defense the Knicks played all night (rim shot). • College Basketball: No. 1 Duke, No. 2 Florida both roll to 17-0, setting up dramatic Rose Bowl showdown. • NHL: Ye...

Poll: Isiah Wins, But It's Closer Than You Think
Well, the results are in from our poll about a theoretical (for now) fight between Isiah Thomas and Bill Simmons, and, well, we're rather shocked: You give Simmons a lot better chance of winning this duel than we possibly could have though. Out of Deadspin readers, 46.2 percent of you think Simmo...

The Ugliest Baseball Player Of All Time
Ever wonder who the ugliest baseball player of all time was? (This sounds like every after-the-fourth-beer sports-bar conversation we've ever had.) A deeply entertaining discussion is going on about this at Athletics Nation and, by all accounts, the ugliest player in baseball history had to have b...

A-Rod Finally Stops Spinning
Honestly, we're starting to get a little embarrassed to even post about this, but hey, we're here, this is our job, this is what we do ... it's time for another Alex Rodriguez in the World Baseball Classic post. (We've covered this, let's see, here, here and here.)...

The Long Road Of Sean Payton
If you missed it, the New Orleans Saints hired Cowboys assistant head coach Sean Payton to be its new head coach. We feel somewhat uniquely qualified to discuss this hire, because, by pure happenstance, we've been following Payton's football career since we were about 10 years old....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while folding and ironing your socks (sad, really) ... • College Basketball: The Indiana University knocks off No. 7 Illinois at the real Assembly Hall, to the tune of this. (Ed.'s Note: The person who wrote this has been fired, and also killed). • NBA: Now you may reveal the fact th...

The Millionth Reason Not To Watch Leno
After you've watched the Illini lay waste to the Indiana Hoosiers in Bloomington tonight, we humbly suggest that you turn your dial to "The Late Show With David Letterman" to watch official Friend Of Deadspin Jeff MacGregor talk with everyone's favorite gap-toothed wonder....

Isiah Thomas. Bill Simmons. Quien Es Mas Macho?
In one of those stories that almost seem too good to be true around here, it appears that good ole' Bill Simmons has been threatened by Knicks general "manager" Isiah Thomas on — of all things — Stephen A. Smith's radio show. In his newest "More Cowbell" post, a Simmons reader writes in:...

No Soup For You!
The man you see pictured is Randy Monroe, coach of the Maryland-Baltimore County Retrievers. Last week, his team lost at home to New Hampshire, and Monroe — who is famous for stomping up and down the sidelines and screaming — officially lost it. So what did he do to motivate/punish his team? He ba...

The Final Wake Of Southeast Jerome
To, at last, close the book on our man Clinton Portis and all his press conference personas from the last year, the man himself has finally updated his personal Web site with a detailed timeline, with biographical sketches, of each fraction of his tortured soul....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while watching your Golden Globes Pool picks go up in flames ... • NBA: Lakers beat Heat as Shaq and Kobe have their Brokeback Mountain moment ... • College Basketball: Our Rashad Anderson Fan Club is looking pretty darned prescient after UConn snaps Syracuse's win streak. • NHL: Gre...

Mo Vaughn, Still Pickin' 'Em Up And Settin' 'Em Down
We always liked former Red Sox first whaleman Mo Vaughn, if just because of his always-refreshing honest about where he spent his spare time: strip clubs. (We'll just say reporters always knew where to find him when they needed a quote.)...

About Last Night ...
You awaken in the lower branches of an elm tree, pantsless, beer cans littering the yard below. Don't worry, we'll let you know what you missed ... • AFC Playoffs: Steelers shock Colts, with game ending the way most great ones usually do — with a tackle by the quarterback. • NFC Playoffs: Panthers...

About Last Night...
• NFL: Patriots 13, Broncos 27. Yesterday, Tom Brady's life was 4,000 times better than mine. This morning, only 3,872....

Redskins vs. Seahawks - 4th Quarter
• Hey, a 52-yard gain by the Redskins. All on one play. They are serious about cracking that 200-yard barrier today....