australia Page 17 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Marcos Baghdatis Calmly Destroyed Four Consecutive Tennis Rackets Between Sets Last Night
After falling behind by two sets to Stanislas Wawrinka in the second round of the Australian Open last night, Marcos Baghdatis went to his chair and calmly smashed four consecutive Tecnifibre rackets. The rage propelled him to win the following set, but Wawrinka took the match, 7-6, 6-4, 5-7, 6-1....

Holy Balls Serena Williams Is Ripped: Deadspin's Australian Open Preview
While Americans were freezing their Tebows off watching playoff football, the first major tennis tournament of the year kicked off in Australia, with temperatures in Melbourne hitting 92 on day one. Dylan Stableford, Deadspin's tennis editor, has a preview of the action Down Under....

Cameraman On Segway Makes For Incredible Views Of Cricket Pitch, Humiliating Crash
Joe Previtera, an Australian television cameraman known as "Joe the Cameraman," got his karmic return 12 years after his infamous "sledging" (or insulting, in cricket speak) of a cricketer during a 1999 match when he fell off of his Segway during an Australia-India test match yesterday....

Billie Jean King And Martina Navratilova Respond To Australian Legend's Homophobic Rant
Margaret (Smith) Court is a former Australian tennis great turned pastor in something called the Victory Life Church. Earlier in the week she made statements with regard to homosexuality, marriage and political correctness. Some of her thoughts are listed below:...

Lingerie Football Star Chloe Butler May Break Hearts, Definitely Breaks Arms
Meet Chloe Butler. She is an Australian lingerie football star, currently playing for the Los Angeles Temptation. As any degenerate will tell you, lingerie football is no joke. The stakes are high, and the fans higher. It should come as no surprise, then, that Chloe here takes great joy in inflicti...

Meet The Minor Leaguer And Scam Artist Who Sold A Pittsburgh Pirate To Australia
Surely it was a surprising development when Pirates outfielder Xavier Paul agreed to sign with the Brisbane Bandits of the Australian Baseball League this season. But his agent dotted the I's and crossed the T's, and Brisbane rolled out the red carpet for Paul to make his debut last week....

Aussie With World's Largest Collection Of Antoine Walker Memorabilia May Also Have World's Only Collection Of Antoine Walker Memorabilia
Matt Clarke from Australia calls himself the "biggest Walker fan in the world." (He's referring to former NBA/current Idaho Stampede player Antoine Walker, in case you don't share his passion.) We will not attempt to disprove that claim. If anyone else on this galaxy happens to own Walker's Timberwo...

Australia's Biggest Horse Race Was Won By A Nose Hair
Today is the Melbourne Cup, Australia's richest turf race and an event so big, they can hold it at 3pm on a Tuesday. The winner was Dunaden, but holy shit not by much. The French-trained horse beat out Red Cadeaux by the slimmest of margins, and judges pored over the photo finish for three minutes b...

Crazed Australian Rugby Fan Advocates For Pedophile Wallabies, Nazi Kiwis, And In-Game Snipers
On Sunday, Australia meets South Africa in the Rugby World Cup quarterfinals. The pundits are nattering aplenty. Perhaps the least conventional viewpoint is the one expressed above: that the Aussie team needs to "harden the fuck up" and get a "bit of mongrel back in the game" by adding snipers to ...

The Irish Rugby Team Wins One For The Displaced
Chris Benz and Dave Shireley will be filing dispatches from the Rugby World Cup in New Zealand, in the odd moments that they are sober. For a rugby glossary and position guide, click here....

Strippers Help Australian Youth Football Team Celebrate A Big Win
The East Brighton Vampires under-16 football team had a big win in the grand finals. Afterwards, the Aussie lads retired for a private party where "Vampires president Greg Wallace confirmed an adult entertainer had been present but was not sanctioned by the club. Alcohol was consumed ... and there ...

A Seemingly Naked Australian Rules Football Player Got Arrested For Roughing Up A Thai Cop
"Star Gold Coast Suns AFL player Campbell Brown and young teammate Maverick Weller were detained by police in Thailand yesterday. They had allegedly been involved in a fight with a local policeman. ... Pictures obtained from a witness show Brown and Weller handcuffed and seemingly in distress. The ...

Are Rugby Brawls More Spectacular Than American Throwdowns?
What we have here is a pair of efficient slobberknockers between NRL sides Melbourne and (appropriately-named) Manly. Injuries, ejections and suspensions galore, and we're instinctively tempted to say this contains more excitement and outright violence that anything we're used to seeing in America...

Australian Sports Are Designed For Incredible Catches
That's David Mead of the Gold Coast Titans with the incredible fingertip grab and score from this weekend's NRL action. Australians seem obsessed with anointing highlights the "try of the year" , but apparently rugby league is a totally different sport from Aussie Rules Football, so Mead can have ...

The Best Argument For Eliminating Offensive Pass Interference
Different football (Australian), different rules (as far as we can tell from watching this televised Calvinball that airs on the wee hours on ESPN2, there are no rules). But we're still awestruck by this move that Carlton's Andrew Walker pulled on Saturday night....

Here's A Nice Lady Fan Peeing In Her Seat (NSFW)
We know. The line to the ladies room is long. We sympathize. But still: ew ew ew....

If You Want To Play Soccer In Australia, Please Remove Your Genital Piercings First
The Old Hill Wanderers would like to clear up the specifics in an incident that led to a red card in a game against Swinburne on June 19:...

Little Girl Muay Thai Match Ended In A Draw With No Fatalities
Both "Princess" Jasmine Parr and Georgina "Punch Out" Barton survived their showdown in the ring in Australia today. Each won some coin for their efforts, too....

This Horrific Leg Injury From An Australian Football Game Will Make You Hate Sports Forever
We trust that you know yourself well enough to fairly judge whether or not you want to see this gruesome clip, especially just before lunch. You might want to wait until after you've had your sub. Or maybe you don't want to watch it at all. It's up to you. What you need to decide for yourself is w...

Here's Video Proving An Australian Rugby Player Didn't Stick His Fingers In His Cousin's Ass
Jeremy Smith and Kalifa Faifai Loa are cousins. They also both play rugby in Australia. During a recent Cronulla/North Queensland match, Faifai Loa was on the ground with Smith atop him. That much is clear. Here's what isn't clear: Whether Smith slid his fingers up his cousin's ass....