How Is Christian Pulisic Going To Fit In At Chelsea?
On Wednesday, Premier League giants Chelsea purchased Christian Pulisic from Borussia Dortmund for an astronomical €64…
Hot Damn, Chelsea Just Bought Christian Pulisic For A Shit-Ton Of Money
The rumor mill has been in overdrive these past few weeks about Christian Pulisic’s future, and today we got official…
Borussia Dortmund Defender Manuel Akanji Is The King Of Quick Maths
Last year, British rapper Big Shaq took the world by storm with an incredible freestyle performance during which he…
Christian Pulisic Went Off Today
An update on Christian Pulisic, American superstar: he is still extremely good at soccer. Today, in a DFB Pokal win…
Maybe Paco Alcácer Sold His Soul To The Devil For The Power To Score Whenever He Wants
Though Paco Alcácer’s goal today came when Spain were already down big in their UEFA Nations League match against…
Hoffenheim Striker Misses Open-Net Game-Winner
Regardless of the sport, it’s the dream of every young athlete to one day score a last-minute game-winner in front of a…
Wonderteen Christian Pulisic, Who Is Now A Wonderman, Scores Winner On 20th Birthday
Christian Pulisic turned 20 years old today, which means he is no longer the Wonderteen we have all known and loved,…
Three-Team Standoff Hopefully Will Not End With Arsenal's Dick Getting Shot Off
Famously star-crossed Premier League club Arsenal have already had a bad winter transfer window. Just last week the…
Manchester United Need To Stay The Fuck Away From Our Wonderteen
The good thing about having one of the soccer world’s most coveted young attacking prospects is that the eyes of the…
America's Wonderteen Delivers 89th-Minute Match-Winner For Dortmund
Borussia Dortmund claimed a 2-1 win over Hoffenheim today when Christian Pulisic juggled his way past Oliver Baumann in…
Cristiano Ronaldo May Be Butt In La Liga, But He's Still Good In The Champions League
Real Madrid superstar Cristiano Ronaldo ranks second in La Liga in shots taken per 90 minutes. Ahead of him is some…
Tottenham And Dortmund Are Throwing A Golazo Party
Everyone knew today’s Tottenham-Borussia Dortmund match was going to be the one to watch even before the games kicked…
In Ousmane Dembélé, Barcelona Have Found A New Heir For Lionel Messi
At long last, some good news for FC Barcelona. Both Barça and Borussia Dortmund have now officially announced their…
Christian Pulisic Kicks Off The Bundesliga Season Like A Superstar
Every time I worry the American soccer press (Deadspin included) is being too hyperbolic in their praise and general…
How Barcelona's Scramble To Replace Neymar Might Send Christian Pulisic To The Stars
It wasn’t really supposed to happen like this. French teen sensation Kylian Mbappé was slated to be this summer’s…
Christian Pulisic Starts His Season Off By Embarrassing Bayern Munich
America’s Wonderteen, Christian Pulisic, scored the opener of the German Super Cup for Dortmund against Bayern today,…
Go Ahead And Enjoy Christian Pulisic Tearing Shit Up In A Meaningless Game
I’m not going to tell you that Christian Pulisic’s performance in today’s Borussia Dortmund-AC Milan friendly—in which…
Dortmund's Other Teenage Star Slams The Door On Bayern Munich To Reach German Cup Final
With Bayern Munich and Borussia Dortmund tied 2-2 late in their German Cup semifinal match, Dortmund’s teenage star (no,…
Prosecutors: Dortmund Bus Bomber Was Carrying Out Get-Rich-Quick Scheme
German authorities have arrested a 28-year-old man of German and Russian descent who they believe tried to blow up the…
More Magic From America's Wonderteen Christian Pulisic
American soccer sensation Christian Pulisic has had a hell of a week. Less than 24 hours after the Dortmund bus was…