bu Page 533 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ohio State Players Who Took Discounted Stuff Will Return For Another Year Of Nominally Unpaid Labor
The Tattooed Five will be back in Columbus next year, per an agreement with Jim Tressel, who will teach the players a hard lesson about not paying for stuff by bringing them back for another year of unpaid football....

Last Night's Winner: The Kings' Only Highlight Of The Season
Tyreke Evans nailed an honest-to-god game-winner from halfcourt. No lame first half buzzer beaters, no overturned on review horseshit. Just a desperation heave to save the Kings. Now watch, Evans will miss two months and Sacramento will lose 10 in a row....

Time To Put The ESPN Ombudsman's Photo On Milk Cartons
Number of ESPN columns praising Don Ohlmeyer in the last 68 days: one. Number of Don Ohlmeyer's ESPN Ombudsman columns in the last 68 days: none....

Referee Achieves Lifelong Dream Of Flipping Off Fans
Mini-controversy in Columbus, as veteran ref Paul Devorski allegedly responded to taunting fans by showing them exactly what they can do to themselves....

Gilbert Arenas's Full-Court Shot That Wasn't, Then Was, Then Wasn't Again
If not for that pesky buzzer, Gilbert's rim-to-shot-clock-nothing-but-net heave would be that kind of thing that happens only when you escape the Wizards. (In Washington, the ball would have nailed a sick child in the fifth row.)...

Renardo Sidney Is Trouble Off The Court, In Practice, And Now In The Stands Too
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

I'm Kind Of Starting To Enjoy Sidney Crosby, And Other Random <em>NHL 24/7</em> Observations
Last night was the second of four HBO 24/7: Penguins/Capitals: The Road to the Winter Classic episodes. Here, a few thoughts more disjointed than Matt Hendricks's face....

The OSU Punishments Are An Embarrassment To The NCAA, And Show Exactly Who Cares About Bowl Games
Terrelle Pryor and four other Buckeyes will miss five games next year, but will play in this year's Sugar Bowl. An odd punishment, one that illustrates the corporate interests at play and the apparent validity of the "I didn't know" defense....

Last Night's Winner: The Chicago Bulls Kill Christmas
From their rendition of "The Twelve Days of Christmas," we learn that everyone on the Bulls is tone deaf, and one of them might be stoned. Guess which one. Go on, guess....

The Steelers Got A Phantom First Down Sunday
Oh look, the Steelers got the benefit of a call that was an honest mistake, didn't affect the game, and still won't stop everyone's beliefs that refs love Pittsburgh from being reinforced....

Insane Scramble, Hail Mary Win HS Championship
Facing fourth-and-19, with two minutes left in California's D-III title game, Kingsburg needed a miracle. It would be their second one of the year....

Breaking Down The Pens' And Caps' Gameplans, As Captured By <em>24/7</em> Cameras
Justin Bourne does a bang-up job of analyzing what we (and HBO's cameras) saw on the whiteboards in the Capitals and Penguins' respective locker rooms....

Tonight's NHL 24/7 Premiere: "You'll Have To Hide The Kids"
Tonight is the premiere of HBO's straightforwardly-titled series 24/7 Penguins/Capitals: Road to the Winter Classic. Want to know exactly which expletives Bruce Boudreau spat at his Caps during their 7-0 loss to the Rangers on Sunday? Now you will....

Ryan Clark Rocks Out With Bieber, Cries With Ochocinco
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Steelers safety runs with different crowds....

Even Back Hair Performance Art Couldn't Save Appalachian State Football
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Keith McCants Got Arrested On Crack-Related Charges Again
In 1990, the Tampa Bay Buccanners made Keith McCants the number four pick in the NFL draft. Didn't really work out. Yesterday, he logged his sixth drug-related arrest since Feb. 2008....

Wrestling Confronts The "Finger Up The Ass" Menace
A perfectly legal move has landed a high school wrestler in court, charged with a sex crime. What exactly constitutes the feared but misunderstood "butt drag?"...

The NBA Was Silly With Game-Winners Last Night
You know how in a basketball video game, you'll intentionally let the computer tie it up so you can nail the buzzer-beater? The NBA was like that yesterday....

Bus Cook Has Not Heard Anything About Roger Goodell's Ruling On Brett Favre's Penis
We just spoke with Mr. Cook on his cellular device. Q: Anything on Goodell's ruling? A: (Molasses-and-toothpicks drawl) "Nuthin'. And I really don't think I need to be talkin' to you nee-thur." Fair enough....

Searching For...Peerless Price
An attorney by the name of W. Anthony Collins has called on the I-Team to help locate the former Vols/Bills/Falcons/Seahawks/Cowboys wide receiver. He's vanished, you see....