bu Page 534 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Gay Poles Want Separate Seating At Euro 2012 Games
Rainbow Stand 2012 (aka Teczowa Trybuna 2012) bills itself as the Polish national soccer team's first gay fan club. And who knows, maybe they are. Per the Warsaw Business Journal, members have asked UEFA for separate seating during the Euro 2012 tournament which will be played in Poland and the Ukr...

Harvey Updyke, Alleged Tree Poisoner, Is Living In His Car In The Woods
After three lawyers assigned to the case bowed out for various personal reasons, a man in Alabama has finally agreed to take on the case of Harvey Updyke, the former state trooper who allegedly poisoned Auburn's oak trees at Toomer's Corner. The lucky attorney, Glennon Threatt, Jr., went on the Paul...

We Are All Dave McKenna XX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit vanishes like a Redskins head coach after two seasons. Today's installment comes from perpetually ill-tempered new media comedian Buzz Bissinger in...

Here's A Carolina Buzzer-Beater That Has Nothing To Do With Tobacco Road
Coastal Carolina offers up a case study in where not to throw the ball on a full-court in-bounds pass with seconds remaining in a tie game: a rainbow into the middle of the court is never really a safe bet. UNC-Asheville, in its second appearance on this site in two weeks, defeated Coastal Carolin...

Pittsburgh's Brett Keisel Will Shear His Neptunian Beard For Charity
Brett Keisel of the Steelers will be de-bearded for charity on Thursday, Feb. 24 at the Diesel Club Lounge in Pittsburgh. The $25 tickets will benefit the Children's Hospital at the University of Pittsburgh's Medical Center, and if anyone feels the need to truly commemorate the occasion, there will ...

Tree-Poisoner's Lawyer Wants Off The Case Because He's An Auburn Fan
Time once again to play everybody's favorite game! SEC Fans: Big Children or Biggest Children? As a volunteer militia puts Alabama's Bear Bryant statue under 24-hour guard for fear of retaliation, the state gears up for its biggest trial since Atticus Finch defended Tom Robinson....

Let Us Begin Our All-Night Tree Vigil For The Oaks At Toomer's Corner
The trees are cloaked in their customary strips of toilet paper, and a man from Dadeville who named his kids "Bear" and "Crimson" awaits justice. At College Street and Magnolia Avenue in Auburn this evening, Tiger fans mourn the loss of their beloved oak trees. The sites seem to be having a bit of d...

'Bama Fan Who May Have Been A State Trooper Charged with Poisoning Auburn's Trees
Harvey Almorn Updyke, a 62 year-old from Dadeville, Ala., has been arrested for poisoning the beloved oak trees at Aurburn's Toomer's Corner. Updyke, according to his Facebook profile, is a retired Texas State Trooper and a dedicated 'Bama fan (note the patterned hat; he also has a Facebook friend n...

Daddy Loves You, Son, And Fuck Everybody Else
It's sweet that this Buffalo Sabres fan, knowing he'd be sitting up against the glass, made a "Dad Loves U" sign so his kids at home could see it on TV. It's poor timing, then, that the cameras finally found him after Toronto scored the go-ahead goal, and his natural inclination to flip off the Leaf...

Pour One Out For Auburn's Trees Tonight
Toomer's Corner, the spiritual heart of Auburn's campus and the destination spot to celebrate wins, was poisoned with a "very lethal dose" herbicide. Naturally, the perpetrator bragged about it on Finebaum's show. People have heart attacks. People admit to tree-killing. These are things that happen ...

Hofstra's Charles Jenkins Hit A Game-Tying Three And A Game-Winning Three Last Night
Last night against William & Mary, Hofstra's Charles Jenkins knocked down a three to send the game into overtime, and then launched a game-winning 35-footer at the buzzer for the win. And you thought you'd never see a bona fide highlight from ye olde Colonial Athletic Association....

Topless Italian Soccer Player Headbutts Fully Dressed British Coach
Tottenham Hotspur traveled to Italy to face AC Milan in the UEFA equivalent of the Sweet Sixteen today. It was a chippy game which Tottenham won after Aaron Lennon broke away and assisted Peter Crouch on the game's lone goal with about 10 minutes left....

The Real Ronaldo Decides To Call It A Day
The Spoiler was just a whipper-snapper when Ronaldo first came to our attention and he absolutely blew our tiny little mind. He was unbelievably strong, quick and skilful — he's what Jonah Lomu could've been if he'd not lived in New Zealand and made the right life choices....

UConn Booster Goes Crawling Back To The Place That Loves His Money
University of Connecticut Board of Trustees Chairman Larry McHugh announced last night that the academic institution has reached detente with booster Robert G. Burton....

Here's A College Basketball Open Thread
Yes, Syracuse/Louisville and Kentucky/Vanderbilt are already underway. Good Top 25 matchups, for sure. But Ohio State/Wisconsin and Pittsburgh/Villianova are coming up (2 p.m. and 9 p.m., respectively), and since they're Top 14 matchups, they get open-thread timing priority....

Rinku And Dinesh Are Coming To A Crappy Disney Movie Near You
Disney has hired screenwriter Tom McCarthy to write the script for "Million Dollar Arm," the inspiring story of two young Indian men who won a reality show and then got signed by the most miserable team in the major leagues. Rinku Singh and Dinesh Patel requested in 2009 that we not equate their sto...

Sidney Crosby's Season Might Or Might Not Be Over
Sidney Crosby got to talking about his recovery from last month's concussion. He said he hopes to come back this season, but can't say for sure whether he will....

Pat Burrell Is The Machine. Fact.
In a post titled "Pat Burrell Says Hello!," BarStool Sports has seemingly put to rest any questions about the identity of Brian Wilson's special gimp-gear-laden pal, affectionately called The Machine....

HS Baseball Coach Cuts Double-Amputee Pitcher; Quickly Becomes Worst Human Ever
This young man is Anthony Burruto, a sophomore at Dr. Phillips High School in Orlando and an aspiring pitcher. Burruto was born without a shinbone in his left leg and without a fibula in his right, and doctors amputated his lower legs when he was just a baby. He's been playing baseball since he was ...

The Most Pirates Story Ever: Pittsburgh Loses Arbitration Case Against 1-11 Pitcher
Yeah, we know arbitration is about more than one isolated season, and Ross Ohlendorf is better than that record would suggest. Still, this doesn't happen to any other team. [Post-Gazette]...