chicago Page 155 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Leftovers: Don't Mess With Texas
• Texans fire offensive coordinator Chris Palmer. Yeah, that'll turn the tide.* [KSPN • K State RB Thomas Clayton knocks over a couple of guys and speeds to daylight — in a car. [Tony's Kansas City] • Ronaldinho selected world player of the year. There'll be dancing in the streets of Rio tonight! Um...

On The DL: That Drunk, Impregnating Farnsworth
It's time for installment No. 2 of our three-part series revealing the athletes behind some of On The DL's blind-items. Last week, we found out that the ladies say Cubs second baseman Todd Walker loves to flash his wedding ring at strip clubs. Today's blind item: I'm Ok, I sWaRe...:...

On The DL: Athletes Unmasked!
So we've been talking for the last couple of days to the people at On The DL, the blind item sports gossip site that claims to have inside info on the cheating ways of countless Major League Baseball players. We initially had some doubts about their verisimilitude, and even though we still advise ...

Blogdome: The Freefalling White Sox
• If the White Sox actually blow this lead, will manager Ozzie Guillen just starting killing people, randomly? It seems somewhat likely. [Baseball Musings] • Contrary to lazy popular opinion, not all members of the Portland Trail Blazers are on drugs, or even bad people. [TrueHoop] • Was last night'...

Jerry Rice Refuses To Go Gently
We're actually starting to feel kind of bad for Jerry Rice. The guy's very possibly the best player in NFL history and, now that he has been kicked off three teams and has an opportunity to retire gracefully, he's still desperate to play some more. When asked on the CBS pregame show last Sunday wh...

Blogdome: Stay Angry, San Diego
• Has a first place team ever been more unhappy and less fun to watch then the San Diego Padres? [Gas Lamp Ball] • A rare black umpire died. Did anyone notice? [BlackAthlete] • It might comes as a surprise to people outside of New York — or even, we'll admit, us — but Mark Messier wasn't nearly as p...

Today In Oddjack
What you're missing over at Oddjack, the site for both the discerning speculator and the degenerate gambler ... • Bill Simmons has a sure thing. Why do we hear that and immediately think of Michael Keaton in Night Shift? • If you're thinking about going against the Bears this week, Kyle Orton would ...

About Last Night ...
• What you missed while shaving profanities onto your dog ... • Florida State beats Miami in football ... wait, that can't be right. • Jerry Rice decides to retire after Broncos clean out his locker, paint over his parking space and refuse to let him back into the building. • White Sox grind Curt Sc...

Blogdome: It's College Football Time!
News and Views From a Galaxy Located Somewhere Near Your Basement ... • Boy, it sure is nice to see people previewing an actual college football game. [Sporting Fool] • Life can get treacherously dull in September when you're a Cubs fan. [Bleed Cubbie Blue] • Jajaja! [Yard Work] • He may be cuddly, ...

Blogdom's Best: Arena League Shenanigans
News and Views From 40-Year Old Virgins ... • Apparently, they pay you enough in the Arena Football League to afford cocaine. Who knew? [Can't Stop The Bleeding] • Mets fans are losing their collective shit. [Faith and Fear in Flushing] • It just looks kind of weird, the White Sox having a magic num...

Communication Breakdown
Taken by Cubs blogger Bleed Cubbie Blue, the above photo is of Dodgers first baseman and fantasy team kryptonite Hee Seop Choi giving hitting advice to Cubs outfielder and even worse fantasy offender Corey Patterson....

Blogdom's Best: Make The Bad Mustached Man Go Away
News And Views From The Disaffected and Bored ... • It has come to this: People are blatantly begging the Orioles to dump Rafael Palmeiro. On anyone. [Camden Chat] • If Cubs fans could actually bury their team under six feet of dirt, you know they totally would. [Bleed Cubbie Blue] • Tennis players ...

To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch Instead Of Endless Hurricane News ... • Monday Night (Exhibition) Football: Rams at Lions. Remember when they wore the yellow sportscoats with the circle on the pockets? We're wearing one now. • MLB: Dodgers at Cubs. Look ... all the Chicago players are vomiting milk. • U.S. Open, Day ...

A Different Kind Of White Sox
Wondering why the White Sox have been playing so poorly lately? It's the panties. Perhaps we should elucidate. Apparently, ChiSox outfielder Timo Perez, to help end a slump, has been hanging "extra-large panties" around the clubhouse in an attempt to pull the team out of its tailspin....

To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch While Trying To Get Out Of Painting ... · NFL: Dallas Cowboys at Seattle Seahawks: Enjoy a good quarter of people's names you barely recognize. But hey, John Madden's there. · MLB: Atlanta Braves at Chicago Cubs: It's always annoying when two SuperStation teams play each other. · Littl...

About Last Night ...
What You Missed While Watching The Office Ladies Attack The Copy Machine Repairman ... · Clemens Roughed Up In Loss. We tell you, that guy's too old to pitch. · Phils, Nats Split Huge Doubleheader. Sharing is good, you guys. Don't get greedy. · Bears, Benson Still Far Apart On Contract. The good new...

Bill Simmons' Continued Blind Spot
We're sorry to pick on him — really! — but we feel obliged to point out that in his new More Cowbell column, which looks at the American League MVP race, our boy Bill says the National League race — a league that Simmons full confesses to "knowing nothing about" — "can be summed up in one word: P...

Ozzie Guillen, Sexual Profiler
According to resident no-fun-guy Rick Morrissey at the Chicago Tribune, White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen might be a little too loosey-goosey with how he jokes around with his friends....

Blogdom's Best: Adam Dunn, Philosopher King
News And Views From The Land Of Stealing Wireless ... · Reds slugger has figured out why the Cubs always suck. [Red Reporter] · Padres outfielder Mark Sweeney looks suspiciously like Vanilla Ice. [Gas Lamp Ball] · Borderline crazed Angels blogger ready to kill "ASSHOLE UNCONSCIOUS RACIST AMATEUR DIC...

To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as your Hummer actually burns gas just sitting in the driveway ... · Monday Night Football: Dolphins vs. Bears. It's an exhibition game, which means we're going to see a lot more of QB Ryan Dinwiddie than we'd prefer. · White Sox at Yankees. Costanzna, get me a couple of those calzones...