christ Page 33 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Happy One-Year Anniversary To This Bullshit
Has it already been a year? It seems like just yesterday I was watching wonderteen Christian Pulisic, now a wonderman, sob tears of abject despair and humiliation on a ratty old pitch after being knocked out of the World Cup qualifying rounds by Trinidad and Tobago. Let us take a trip down memory la...

The Brewers Have Played This All Perfectly
There is no one way to build a really good baseball team. Historically, the innovative Just Spend As Much Money As Needed On The Best Players Available model has a pretty solid track record, but even longtime adherents of that approach have recently backed away from it due to ... well, we can probab...

Brewers' Big Name Acquisitions Come Through In Game 1 Walk-Off Win
The Brewers got nine innings of excellent pitching in a 10-inning game, and won on a walk-off single in extras from Mike Moustakas, to grab Game 1 of their NLDS matchup with the Colorado Rockies....

Prosecutor In Farcical Brett Kavanaugh Hearing Was Part Of Same Office That Let Kevin Johnson Walk Away From Sex Abuse Charges
Rachel Mitchell, the GOP hired gun who shot blanks during last week’s Brett Kavanaugh hearing, told Republican senators immediately after the public fiasco (but before the FBI investigation had begun) that she would not have prosecuted the nominee for his alleged assault of Christine Blasey Ford....

Report: Crowdfunding Drives For College Football Player In Critical Condition Shut Down Over Fear Of NCAA Violations
Tennessee State sophomore Christion Abercrombie suffered a devastating head injury in the first half of his team’s loss to Vanderbilt Saturday. According to Tennessee State head coach Rod Reed, Abercrombie suffered the injury while “taking on a block” during an otherwise typical football play, and c...

Some Types Of Pain Are More Valuable Than Others
It’s both a truism and true that politics is about power, how it’s used and who it’s used against. But politics are also about the business of pain—about which individuals and which communities bear how much and at what cost, and so implicitly whose pain is worth more than others. Everyone lives in ...

The Horror On TV
That all of this—the unalloyed and dovetailing lust for power of one white male sociopath and the aggregate of white men, the future of the highest judicial body in the country, that country’s total failure to assign any kind of consequence to sexual violence, America’s marrow-deep hatred and fear a...

Everyone Thank The Marlins For Making The NL Playoff Race Fun
Things are getting hot in the National League in the final days of the season. After last night’s results, here’s how things stand: The Brewers lead the wild-card race and are a half-game back of the Cubs in the central division; the Rockies are a half-game back of the Dodgers out west and now hold ...

Brett Kavanaugh Is <em></em>A Man The Right Can Get Behind
Shit’s real weird now....

Wonderteen Christian Pulisic, Who Is Now A Wonderman, Scores Winner On 20th Birthday
Christian Pulisic turned 20 years old today, which means he is no longer the Wonderteen we have all known and loved, but instead a full-grown Wonderman. He showed his newfound maturity by scoring the lone goal and winner for Borussia Dortmund in the 85th minute of their Champions League opener again...

The Reds Are Now The Property Of Christian Yelich, Those Are The Rules
Brewers outfielder Christian Yelich hit for the cycle in a game against the Reds back on August 29. It was a career night for Yelich, who finished 6-for-6 from the plate with three RBI in a wacky Brewers win. Yelich hit three dingers and drove in nine runs in that three-game series, so the Reds were...

Pitcher's HR After A Foul Bunt Non-Call Was The Nuttiest Part Of A Very Nutty Brewers-Reds Game
When Reds pitcher Michael Lorenzen entered the batter’s box in the bottom of the sixth of tonight’s game against the Brewers, he was just trying to do what most pitchers do when asked to hit: his best....

Christian Covington's Ego Takes A Hit As The New <i>Madden</i> Has Him Looking Like A Gelatinous Thumb
Texans defensive end Christian Covington is not a particularly handsome man. He’s not an ugly man, either, just an average-looking one. Still, as unremarkable as Covington’s face may be, he does not resemble the creepy, poorly rendered avatar the folks at EA assigned him in Madden 19, as he has disc...

European Soccer Is Loaded With American Kids Ready To Tear Shit Up<em></em>
American wonderteen Christian Pulisic will begin his march to the 2019 Ballon d’Or this weekend when Borussia Dortmund open their Bundesliga season against RB Leipzig. It’s hard to believe that Pulisic is still only 19, since he’s already got two stellar seasons at Dortmund under his belt and is the...

Clemson Is Ready To Claim Its Dynasty
Welcome to the Deadspin 25, a college football poll that strives to be more democratic and less useless than every other preseason poll. Leading up to the college football season kickoff, we will give you previews of the 25 teams that you, the readers, voted to be most worthy of writing about. Now, ...

Let's Check In On Christian Hackenberg
The Eagles brought in Christian Hackenberg to see if there’s any there there for the 2016 second-round pick, who hasn’t played a regular-season NFL snap and is now on his third team. Today was his first day of full-team practices, and ......

Brian Christopher Deserved So Much Better
In the 1980s, when cable television changed the pro wrestling landscape and push truly came to shove in the industry, only one regional promotion survived in anything close to its original form. That was the Tennessee-based USWA, owned by Jerry Jarrett and his longtime top star, Jerry Lawler. With a...

Liverpool's B-Team Came To America To Get Smacked Around By Christian Pulisic
Wonderteen Christian Pulisic willed Borussia Dortmund to a 3-1 victory over Liverpool in the International Champions Cup on Sunday, in front of 55,447 of his countrymen in Charlotte. The 19-year-old subbed in at halftime with his team down 1-0 and promptly took the game over. ...

The Christian Hackenberg Era In Oakland Is Over After Three Weeks
Three weeks ago, the New York Jets traded former second-round pick Christian Hackenberg to the Raiders after keeping his ass firmly planted on the bench for two entire seasons. Unfortunately, he will not take the field for the Raiders either, as ESPN’s Field Yates reported this afternoon that Oaklan...

Jets Trade: Christian Hackenberg, Never Used
Christian Hackenberg, who really is capable of breaking a huddle, was traded this afternoon from the Jets to the Raiders, somehow....