christ Page 40 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Sacramento Kings Finally Broke Doug Christie
The 26-41 Sacramento Kings were down 74-53 to the 25-41 New Orleans Pelicans at halftime Wednesday night, getting torched by Ryan Anderson for 21 points in the second quarter. Analyzing the first half on CSN California, former King and NBA All-Defensive 1st teamer Doug Christie lost it, pleading wit...
Chaco Giménez Shoots From Goddamn Jupiter, Scores
If Alessandro Florenzi’s wondergoal in September came from Mars, Chaco Giménez’s strike from even further out can only be described as originating from the next planet back....
Christopher Bell Somehow Walks Away From Devastating Wreck On Race's Final Lap
Johnny Sauter won tonight’s NASCAR truck race at Daytona, but everyone’s eyes were on Christopher Bell’s #4 truck after it went tumbling due to a wreck on the race’s final lap....
Hot Damn, Check Out This Christine Sinclair Golazo
Canada and Costa Rica are playing each other in Olympic Qualifiers right now, and Christine Sinclair put Canada up 2-0 with this beauty. This ain’t quite Christen Press’s once-in-a-lifetime first touch, but it’s awful damn good. Poor Costa Rica just keeps getting golazo’d on....
Holy Shit, Christen Press's First Touch Will Make Your Knees Buckle
Oh my god look at this first touch from Christen Press. She doesn’t just expertly control a cross whipped into her, but no-look uses the outside of her foot (her heel?!) to gently drop the ball just a few feet in beside her to wheel around and smash home. It should be illegal to be this skilled and ...
Goddammit, Benteke, Again?!?
If you can’t tell from the angle above, that is Liverpool’s Christian Benteke bearing down on West Ham’s goalkeeper in extra time of their FA Cup replay. If you know anything about the striker in question, you can guess what happened next:...
U.S. Attorney Suggests Password Cardinals Used To Access Astros Scouting Database Was “Eckstein123"
Earlier this month, former Cardinals scouting director Christopher Correa plead guilty to five counts of unauthorized access to a computer for hacking the Houston Astros database. Unsealed federal documents revealed that Correa used an old password to look at confidential information, including scou...
Report: Chip Kelly Was Fired In Part Because He Messed Up The Eagles' Holiday Party
Holiday parties are a wonderful time of the year where you can get drunk with your coworkers, contract gonorrhea from them, or in Chip Kelly’s case, hurry on your pending unemployment. CBS’ Jason La Canfora has a report from the aftermath of Kelly’s firing by the Philadelphia Eagles, and it’s pretty...
Christian Hackenberg Thanks Everyone But His Coach While Declaring For NFL Draft
Penn State lost to Georgia in a bowl game this afternoon. It was an ugly game made uglier by star Penn State QB Christian Hackenberg leaving the game in the second quarter with an injury. His backup threw a cool touchdown, but other than that, nah....
Shut Up, Shithead
Get a load of this Stanford shithead who won’t shut up while ESPN tries to interview Christian McCaffrey, who basically singlehandedly won the Rose Bowl. This clown is relentless. He’s also now become a meme:...
Christian McCaffrey Goes 75 Yards On Rose Bowl's First Play [UPDATE: And He's Added A Punt Return TD]
Christian McCaffrey proved himself to be college football’s most versatile player this season, and the Stanford star continued his reign by catching a Kevin Hogan pass and finding the end zone 75 yards away on the Rose Bowl’s first play. Here’s how it sounded on Russian television:...
Christian Benteke Had Another Brutal Miss Today
Don’t click on the video just yet. Look at the image for a second. Christian Benteke, yards clear of any defender, strolls into the heart of the penalty box with only the keeper to beat. It was right about at that frame when, watching it live, I thought to myself, He’s definitely about to miss this....
Liverpool Storm Four Men On Open-Goal Fast Break, Still Don't Score
Liverpool beat Leicester City 1-0 at Anfield today, holding the league’s most surprising team scoreless for the first time all season. But it should have been a 2-0 victory, as a late open goal break somehow fell apart when Christian Benteke couldn’t find a net left vacant by Kasper Schmeichel. Schm...
Happy Birthday, Rickey Henderson!
Today is a day to celebrate, among other things, the birthday of Rickey Henderson, a man who embodies baseball at its best so completely that it’s hard to do him any justice. Here’s to you, Rickey....
Enjoy Some Of The Most Ridiculous Christmas Wish Lists Ever Written
If you got what you wanted for Christmas, that’s probably in part because you didn’t ask for, say, “A little thing that can turn into anything at anytime.” This would set you apart from the authors of the lists below, some of whom got some of what they wanted, some of whom just couldn’t possibly hav...
What Is The Best Birthday Month?
PROGRAMMING NOTE: I’m outta here next week to go do Christmas things. You’re not getting a Funbag. You’ll have to go mud-sledding or something. Deadspin founder and artificial Georgian Will Leitch will be your Jamboroo guest host. ...
24 Winter Beers, Ranked
Winter beer is a slippery category that used to comprise slightly boozy ales brewed with spices and odd grains, but has long since metastasized to include not only those traditional “winter warmers,” but also just about any damn thing a brewery’s marketing department feels like hanging a snowflake o...
What To Wear To Your Company Christmas Party
Your company Christmas party is your annual opportunity to look your holiday best in front of your coworkers, or at least show the people you see every day that you own more than two shirts. You may agonize over your attire. But I’m here to tell you to do the opposite of what you’ve been told. Don’t...
The 2015 Hater’s Guide To The Williams-Sonoma Catalog
I have terrible news for you, America. I know that you’ve already endured a harsh autumn of partisan politics and mass tragedies and inconsistent NFL officiating. I know you can’t handle one more goddamn piece of bad news right now. It’s too much. It may break your spirit entirely. But I have to do ...