da Page 1048 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Erin Andrews Has Made It After All
It wasn't that long ago that everyone wondered how Erin Andrews could ever recover from her humiliating and scary stalker episode. Now she's rolling around in lingerie and letting people rave about her ass. Looks like she made it....

Aural Secs: David Ortiz's 30-Second Tater Trot Explained With Music
In honor of David Ortiz's Roger Bannister moment last night, an Aural Secs is in order. Unlike frequent Aural Secs subject Usain Bolt, Ortiz is quite slow, so we're going with the final chord in "A Day In The Life."...

Photos From The World Poutine-Eating Championship Will Disgust You
Last Saturday, Toronto hosted the first-ever Major League Eating-sanctioned poutine-eating contest, and by the looks of it, it was a gravy-and-curd-soaked madhouse. Torontoist has an account of the festivities and more photos like this one of Pete "Pretty Boy" Davekos. [Torontoist]...

Mississippi State Recruit Bodyslams Math Teacher Onto Unemployment Line
Click to view Here's video of Jamerson Love, a cornerback for Aberdeen High School, wrestling now-former algebra teacher Shobul Johnson. Allegedly, Johnson asked his students to "black out the windows" and "move the furniture" before commencing to rumble. Then he got his asymptote kicked. [Rivals]...

Today In Tacky World Cup Marketing: Hyundai's Soccer Car
Soccer-ball wheels, soccer-cleat sideviews, artificial-turf interiors make for one hideous promotional vehicle. At the same time, shouldn't every sport be doing this? I want to laugh at a Ford F-150 outfitted with a Buccaneers helmet, stat. [Copyranter]...

Fat-Ass Baseball Players Get Their Roger Bannister Moment
Per Wezen-Ball's wonderful Tater Trot Tracker, David Ortiz rounded the bases after yesterday's solo shot in 30.59 seconds, a new record by nearly eight-tenths of a second. Yes, mankind has at last shattered the 30-second barrier. [Wezen-Ball]...

Minor Leaguers Mercilessly Teased For Their Giant, Goofy Heads
Big helmet or tiny head? Francisco Cervelli fans (hey, he has some!) have been wondering that for a few weeks now, but in the coming years an entire corps of MLB players may look like futuristic, yet dorky space travelers....

In Dallas Braden's 209, People Get Tattoos That Read "209"
Area code fetishist Dallas Braden went home this weekend to Stockton — the 209 — where he and his perfecto were honored by the Athletics' high-A affiliate. The 209 responded with polite applause and another thousand mortgage defaults. [Minor League Baseball]...

Why Did Fans Boo Danica Patrick At Indy 500 Qualifying?
Helio Castroneves won the pole for next Sunday's Indy 500. But the real story out of qualifying yesterday was Danica getting lustily booed by the crowd. Let's posit some explanations....

40-Year-Old Video Exonerates A-Rod In Dumb Mound-Crossing Controversy
This is a screengrab from the 1971 World Series. And will you look at that? A batter runs across the mound, and somehow the world doesn't launch into a spasm of cock-waggling outrage over a breach of baseball's supposedly inviolable unwritten rules....

And On The Eighth Day, God Ejected Lasorda
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Playing The Blue Jays In Toronto? Leave Your Felons At Home
The MLB Players Association sent a warning to all their player agents that Canadian immigrations officials have recently detained non-Canadian players at the border, due to prior criminal records. Not that agents would know anyone like that, they're just sayin'....

Another Fan Gets Tasered, And This Time It's A Player's Dad
Why yes, astute police blotter readers, that was the father of Boston's Marquis Daniels getting removed from his seat, Tasered, and arrested during last night's game....

What To Do With Hanley Ramirez?
Ramirez embarrassed his team by jogging after a ball. His manager returned the favor, benching him immediately thereafter. Ramirez spouted off to the press about it. We've got a problem here that can't be fixed by the usual news cycle....

Softball Conference Champs Just Want To Dance It Out (WINNER'S UPDATE)
Fresh off winning an Atlantic Sun conference championship, the Lipscomb Lady Bisons debuted a coordinated dance routine. Unfortunately, it brought them neither the replenishing rains that would ensure a bountiful harvest nor a Women's College World Series title....

Paraguayan Soccer Player Rockets In 45-Yard Free Kick
For anyone not satiated by the Lionel Messi goalapalooza from earlier, here is another goal video from a funnily named player in a sports league in a country with which you're vaguely familiar. Somebody buy that man a Baviera. [Goal.com]...

Michael Jordan Likes A Little More Lebensraum In His Hanes
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Cleveland Luminaries Join Forces To Win LeBron's Heart Through Terrible Song (CARL MONDAY UPDATE)
UPDATE: Yeah, that's Carl Monday at the 1:57 mark....

Bill Self To Dance, Dance, Dance The Night Away For Charity
The Hoops Doctors uncovered this video of a leisure-suited Bill Self promoting an upcoming charity event, to be held in Kansas City....

Last Night's Winner: Bob Bradley's Blamelessness
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Bob Bradley's exclusion of Charlie Davies from the World Cup roster, which, thanks to Davies's overly cautious Ligue 1 side, isn't Bradley's fault....