da Page 1217 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
With Your Boys, Talkin' S***. But You're Going Home Alone, Aren't'cha?
If there's a theme to Saturday nights, it's saying and doing things you regret on Sunday. Therefore, here follows a round-up of the various mealy-mouthed guarantees and guarded boasting that amounts to this week's "bulletin board material." You said you're confident in your team's chances of victory...
A Quick Thought On Fantasy Football (Take 2)
I am in four fantasy leagues this year. Last year I was in eight. I'm also the proud owner of two keeper leagues, in both of which I am commissioner. When someone asked me why I would willingly serve as such a glutton for punishment, I replied simply, "I would rather be the guy in charge."...
A Quick Thought On Fantasy Football
I am in four fantasy leagues this year. Last year I was in eight. I'm also the proud owner of two keeper leagues, in both of which I am commissioner. When someone asked me why I would willingly serve as such a glutton for punishment, I replied simply, "I would rather be the guy in charge."...
May Pete Rose Live Long And Die Out
Perhaps you've heard of the new book The World Without Us, Alan Weisman's blow-by-blow account of what would happen on Earth if all human beings suddenly disappeared. But if you think this book is just some environmentalist's wet dream, you're wrong. Dead wrong. People, I give you The Voluntary Huma...
Just Wake Me When It's Over
September, of course, is when baseball approaches my favorite part of the season — the end. I have no genuine qualms with the game or its fans; in fact, I can think of few more enjoyable ways to spend a sunny weekend afternoon than taking in a Greenville Drive game and enjoying moderately-overpriced...
College Games You'd Wade Through A Pile Of $#!+ To See
Only two games this weekend feature ranked opponents going head-to-head. But there are still plenty of intriguing non-conference matchups on the schedule. And you never know when a highly ranked team will shit the bed against an unworthy foe. Could Florida lose to Troy? Anything's possible now....
The Gay Mafia Invade The Mothership
Oh, hello there. We, the fine gentleman from Kissing Suzy Kolber, have been charged with guiding you folks through this, the very first weekend of the NFL season. And we could not be more excited. Not only do we get to watch football, we also get to rush to the computer every five minutes to do HTM...
What Kind Of Sports Bar Societal Dregs Will You Encounter During Week 1?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
ESPN Hires Salisbury Upgrade
ESPN's "NFL Sunday Countdown" has tried all sorts of gimmicks to move the ratings dial up a tick, most famously hiring Rush Limbaugh to defend the long-persecuted white quarterback. But now they're trying something we wouldn't have even thought of: They're bringing in a 10-year-old....
Wade Wilson's Totally Non-Flaccid Excuse
So here's something our Rick Ankiel could use as a defense, when he inevitably addresses the HGH story later today: He was trying to get a boner....
It's Almost Like The Cubs Are Jinxed Or Something
After 100 years of futility, there was really no reason for the folks in the Wrigley bleachers to celebrate early. That's just inviting disaster, isn't it? Cubs fans have only themselves to blame for this one. Oh, and Ryan Dempster too, we suppose. Chicago, leading by a game in the NL Central and f...
Introducing Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo
We are extremely excited to introduce Kissing Suzy Kolber's Big Daddy Drew's brand new column, which will run every Thursday during the NFL season. It'll preview the weekend's action, occasionally digress and mostly revel in the joy and anticipation we all feel at the end of every week, knowing th...
NFL Season Preview: Dallas Cowboys
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that it's today. That's close....
The Picturesque Word Stylings Of Darco Milicic
Sure, I took Serbian in high school — who didn't? — but it's really rusty. So let's leave it to AOL Fanhouse to translate the worst bit of this Darco Milicic tirade against the refs following Serbia's loss to Greece in the European championships. Fanhouse surmises that one of the lines is:...
A-Rod Will Keep Hitting Them Out As Long As You Keep Teeing Them Up
The two-home-runs-in-one-inning phenomenon, usually found only in Little League and the softball game at your company picnic, appeared at Yankee Sradium on Wednesday in the form of a limping, self-satisfied Alex Rodriguez. The two clouts in an eight-run seventh led New York over Seattle 10-2, effect...
The Fantasy Assassins
Considering most of you — unless you happened to draft using Yahoo's fantasy game last night — have already held your fantasy football drafts, you are, today, in the lone moment over the next three months when you won't be tinkering with your team. Right now, you are strong; your team is awesome! An...
Scott Van Pelt Hates Anonymous Internet Garbage
It is amusing to watch a guy like Scott Van Pelt, one of the better ESPN personalities and a guy we certainly have our fair share of history with, struggle with the Internet. He is a Web guy, but he hates the Web; he fears becoming what he most despises....