dea Page 497 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Week In Deadspin: Rockin' The Local 138
• We like to listen to John Rocker talk. Jeff Pearlman? Not so much. • Miami-FIU. What could possibly go wrong? • When Joey Porter and Kellen Winslow feud, it's a catfight, MEOW! • Joel Zumaya has BLISTAS ON HIS FINGAS! • Welcome back leather! (And no Berman jokes here!) PETA is not happy. • It's li...
We Always Thought It'd Be Better To Be A Fake Somebody Than A Real Nobody
No matter what you do, no matter how awful ... no one ever thinks that they're a bad person....
PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands
A few people out there have wondered if the entirely reasonable and in no way dramatically and insanely overstepping in the name of a somewhat noble (occasionally) cause folks at PETA have an opinion on David Stern's decision to be with leather again. Well, they do....
Week In Deadspin: The Ballad Of Ron Herpes
• Calling himself "Ron Herpes" probably would have defeated the point. • David Hirshey takes on Bill Simmons. (Kind of.) • ESPN is down with independent films. One might almost call them underground! • Tony LaRussa is ACTING! • You know what's awesome? The BCS! • Ali Rap is bullocks. • USC just ha...
Do We Laugh Now, Or Wait Until It Gets Funny?
We picked you for the job, not because we think you're so damn smart, but because we thought you were a shade less dumb than the rest of the outfit. Guess we were wrong. You're not smarter, Walter. You're just a little taller....
Week In Deadspin: Remember That Romo Is Mexican
• Freddie Mitchell, substitute teacher. Really. • Vote For Rory! • Michael Irvin "apologizes." • The only league left for Justin Gatlin. • Dallas Clark rules all. • Bill Romanowski has some health tips for you. • Scoop Jackson vs. the blogs. • Jimmy Kimmel for new MNF broadcaster. • Melissa Rivers a...
No, YOU'RE Don Francisco's Sister!
Isn't all mankind ultimately executed for a crime it never committed? The difference is that all men go eventually, but we go at six o'clock tomorrow morning. We were supposed to go at five o'clock, but we have a smart lawyer. Got leniency....
Welcome To Deadspin Widescreen
As some of you might have noticed, the design looks a wee bit different around here today; we're doing some tweaking, some minor "redesigning," if you will, and we think it looks quite nice....
Week In Deadspin: See Ya, Larry
• Tony Banks' wife likes to keep him happy. • Gilbert Arenas is a damned genius. • Look out Bobby Bowden: Here comes the eBay! • The Cubs, they spent a lot of money. • Warren Sapp ... poisoned! • David Wright and Jose Reyes, LOOKING HOT! • Bill Simmons made a fantasy basketball trade with Dean Cai...
We're Easy
Y'all take it easy now. This isn't Dallas, it's Nashville! They can't do this to us here in Nashville! Let's show them what we're made of. Come on everybody, sing! Somebody, sing!...
Happy Thanksgiving, Bird Brains
Well, we figure most of you have skipped out of the office for the long weekend, so we figured we might as well do the same; it's off for Thanksgiving for us now. We were considering doing one of those "We're Thankful For ..." stories, that pointed out all the Crazy and Wacky things in the world of ...
Week In Deadspin: So, What's Everybody Up To Tomorrow Afternoon?
• We still can't believe this YWML reference on "Las Vegas" actually happened. • The coolest cheerleader we've seen outside of Tampa bars. • We continue to wait for ESPN Blogs. • No tickets for Nickelback? Come on! • The Lego Ohio Stadium. • Look, an intern! • Jemele Hill debuts at Page 2. • The M...
Excuse Us, You Did Say Your Clock Was Correct?
The mechanism is ... Oh James, James ... will you make love to me all the time in England? Day and night. Go on about the mechanism....
Week In Review: Rutgers Now, Rutgers Forever
• The Sportshuman Of The Year Tournament has begun! • JERSEY! • That's some wide receiver ass. • Everywhere you look, there's Ned. • If Dan Patrick isn't talking to you, he's a dick! • Chris, who let Christian Slater in here? • Hey, watch the dreads! • Drew Tate ... CLEVER! • To steal Drew's line, "...
Cue The Sun!
We've become bored with watching actors give us phony emotions. We are tired of pyrotechnics and special effects. While the world he inhabits is, in some respects, counterfeit, there's nothing fake about Truman himself. No scripts, no cue cards. It isn't always Shakespeare, but it's genuine. It's a ...
On To Victory! (Well, Not Necessarily THAT Kind Of "Victory")
When you're a high school soccer coach, you've got several options when it comes to motivating your team. You can help them practice diving. You can teach them to pick up the football players' girlfriends when they're at a road game. You can even shower them with flop sweat. All kinds of choices....
Throwing An Intern To The Wolves
We've never done this before — to start this off like a Penthouse Letter — but we are here to put out an open call for an intern. This is not because we need someone to fetch us our slippers or to ejaculate as a result of oral stimulation, though, all told, neither of those are necessarily horrible ...
Bo Schembechler Gets Meta On Us
We've told you repeatedly about the Dead Schembechlers, the Ohio State fan punk band that features thrash ditties like "Bomb Ann Arbor Now" and "Chad Henne is A Motherfucking Joke." (Their official site is right here, though someone should probably mention that no one does splash pages anymore.)...
Week In Deadspin: World Series Hangover
• Hey, the Cardinals won the World Series. And, amazingly, we were there. • Ben Roethlisberger is wisely keeping his distance from the motorcycles. • Whoa. The Knicks won. • Harold Reynolds is coming, ESPN, he's COMING! So be ready. We went in depth on his suit. • GARRRRRRRRR! • Eagles fans are havi...
We Haven't Had A Drink In A Lotta Years, But Now We're Gonna Have Us A Cold Beer
There's no one knows your life better than a brother that's near your age. He knows who you are and what you are better than anyone on earth. My brother and we said some unforgivable things the last time we met, but we're trying to put that behind us, and this trip is a hard swallow of our pride. We...